- Producer11/05/2017Mordiscos de realidadHoy os voy a contar algo , respecto a mi vida. Hace apenas unos días estuve reunida con mis médicos , y me comunicaron que los resultados de mi TAC , no eran "normales" veían una imagen donde se puede ver un nódulo apróximadamente de 2 centímetros ....
Comments11/05/2017 #5 CityVP 🐝 ManjitI began with checking if my Spanish was improving so I took a guess that "Mordiscos de realidad" looks like "My Real Dad Likes Disco" and clearly I am useless at Spanish. I ended with a stunned expression as I realized that I was not reading a translation of Spanish, but a translation of humanity and there is so much humanity in what I ended up reading here.
The message here is very personal and it is directed to all of us to take care of ourselves and not gamble with life. In that message is also the bitter reality that represents a wake up call to all of us. Now I know what "Mordiscos de realidad" actually means I am humbled. I had to read it a few times because I wanted to think that this is a very well written story, because in this way we can soften the truth of this, and yet the way it is written is a bitter reality and so one cannot escape from "say it is not so".
The fact that this is in story form demonstrates a tremendous creativity, and the words are powerfully written but this is real, it is not an anecdote, it is happening now and the message is that it could have been caught early with a check up - but it has been checked - and what would have happened if it were left even longer?
I tried to figure out what this was, the only thing I could relate it to was thyroid disease but again I am guessing
I wish the meaning of this buzz was "my real dad likes disco" but it is Mordiscos de realidad - and I will include this in my physical intelligence piece because the reality of this does bite hard . I can only wish the best whatever the actuality is here.
- Producer30/04/2017To Catch A FishFear of death resides in the abyss of our minds. We claw at its inevitability at some point in our lives. Immortality reigns in all of us then fades, leaving the clear knowledge that yes, we all die—shit, me included. We go through life with...
Comments30/04/2017 #11 Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee#9 Astute observations, as always, Manjit. I have known of people in their 20s killed by our disease. For the very young to face death in the full bloom of life is difficult to swallow.
Facing death at any moment brings thoughts of, "it's too soon." I remember the temporary death of my legs in 2012, and this is what came to mind. And the little deaths when we are alive are what grieves us when we're still breathing.30/04/2017 #9 CityVP 🐝 ManjitIn the year 2117 not one of us will be contemplating this question unless we discover some strange transhumanist secret to lengthen our biological clock or some tech way of extending our nervous system through machines.
We have no idea what tomorrow brings. I know a couple of young girls who have already passed away who did not reach the age of 20, and it's humbling when what is constantly hidden from us is all the human beings on the globe who will pass away today having faced terrible life circumstances. It gives pause for thought, and perhaps even more so when death is not a rumination about the great unknown, but an actual death sentence.
Even when I listen to Randy Pausch in his coming to terms with his own death, it is difficult to know how we are to handle this:
A brain that loses oxygen loses memory, whereas an Alzheimer patient literally begins to die while they are still alive, which begs the question why memory would be generous to us after our death and reunite us with long-lost loved ones? The other part of death that is the most uncomfortable proposition is this idea of reincarnation. If I come back as something or someone else in a future life, my present life is gone, and that is what makes dying so challenging, that we only find out what comes after life once we are dead. Until that moment, the alternative is to live life fully and become wise about the nature of loss.
Learning to handle our own death, and especially when it is imminent is a challenging form of learning and wisdom formation.30/04/2017 #8 Tausif MundrawalaMany of us go to fish in the pursuit of achieving something. Everyday sat around the window seat of train i hold a fishing pole i.e my newspaper to attain a power of knowledge. Though the quest is a never ending process it makes my heart to quell this thirst as and when I can. Joyce,my friend, please give regards to Tony and relay my message to never stop fishing. It's a feeling of delight to recall our experiences here on beBee with our friends and family. My family sometimes enquire about my different feelings evoked by different buzzes here and I heartily share my experiences with them. You are a prolific and artful story teller my friend, @Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee30/04/2017 #6 Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee#3 heheh. Thanks, Fatima. Just a little blurb to complete my Sunday morning, and something that's been buzzing around in my head for a few days now. This was a refreshing write regardless of the subject. It has diverted me from more serious matters and I am grateful.30/04/2017 #3 🐝 Fatima G. WilliamsYou are actually way to cool @Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee and to repeat Gert here you just caught a fish.
When we do things that satisfy us and all we want to do is provide and create the same satisfaction for other's around us we are fishing away to glory. Great buzz Keep buzzing 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗 Keep fishing 🐋🐳🐬🐟🐠🐡🐋
- Producer23/04/2017DeceptionI’m not driven to tears often. I see myself as staunch and stoic. Last night, however, I found my face bathed in that salty fluid as I listened to myself assure a victim of a crime that justice would now be done. “They know about him now,” I...
Comments24/04/2017 #14 Tausif MundrawalaThis heart wrenching story of a little girl spoke volumes. A little girl meant to enjoy her childhood was subject to such a heinous act. What would such men achieve by hurting these little angels. I can't say much because such disgusting acts deserves strict punishment.
I am glad that you shared with us my friend, @Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee24/04/2017 #12 Cyndi wilkinsPedophiles are not particularly popular in prison because a very large percentage of those incarcerated have been molested at some point in their own lives...usually during childhood when they were most vulnerable...of course not all offenders retaliate by offending others, but many resort to violent crimes in an effort to vent the fury they feel as a result of being violated. Throw a pedophile into the snake pit with a bunch of angry and heavily burdened souls and you will have a blood bath for sure...Seems a fitting demise for those who would hurt children who are already suffering in their lives with dysfunctional families...Makes me sick to my stomach that so many so called 'professionals' would turn a blind eye to protect their own sorry ass...I have one word for them all...KARMA...It'll get you every time;-) No one gets out of here alive...and karma makes sure you pay your dues before you leave.23/04/2017 #11 Joanne GardockiThank you for your courage and brave heart, @Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee . Your story is a sad statement of failure to protect children. We are seeing change now. People are coming together and standing up, requiring prosecution of predators. May those who suffer finally find safety, trust and the road to complete healing. Your compassionate listening and willingness to act is a shining example in a dark place. I know it is not enough but thank you.23/04/2017 #10 Lisa VanderburgAs small kids, me and my sister were left in the care of a Monsignor Thomas Feeney, Iowa. Later in life, unable to quell a concept that had stayed in me and one sister's minds, we looked up this priest - sure enough, he was part of a large ring of pedophiles. Even though I was only 6 when we left Davenport - that name had stuck with me all my life. I don't know what happened - never will, I guess. http://www.bishop-accountability.org/news2005_07_12/2005_08_06_McGlynn_OutOf.htm
Thank you @Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee for sharing this discovery - takes courage! Only because you have, am I emboldened to do so. You should feel proud - the shame belongs to these soulless perps.23/04/2017 #9 Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee#8 Check back in a day or so. If you think these pieces ar emotionally draining to read, imagine writing them. I flesh it out online because there is pressure to complete. I've added things--conversations and the like. Hard to condense 30 years of research into a 2-minute read.23/04/2017 #5 Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee#3 He probably died in his bed. He resigned his license to practice medicine in order to avoid prosecution. Believe me when I tell you the locals would not prosecute because it would have revealed their complicity in hiding this dangerous predator. It's why I linked the documents. Proof.
- Producer20/04/2017Anxiety and How It Can Interfere With Vacation PlanningHow Anxiety Disorder Can Dampen Vacation PlansThe excitement of going on vacation is replaced with incessant fears Photo Courtesy of Unsplash.comI have been fortunate over the past 20 years because I’ve been able to vacation each year, something...
Comments26/04/2017 #27 🐝 Fatima G. WilliamsI kept sharing this cause I know the heart and mind that wrote it and to show you I am there to support you in any way. I learnt alot about anxiety and how it can affect us through your stories. I would like to say "You Got this Lisa and your going to have a fantastic trip" :)20/04/2017 #19 Lisa 🐝 Gallagher#15 Hi @Renée 🐝 Cormier, sadly with GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder) thoughts do control you in a strange way. That's one of the reasons I'm in therapy working on reprogramming my brain per se. Intrusive thoughts are unwanted thoughts that play over and over like a broken record in your mind no matter what thoughts you try to replace them with, they return instantly. I never realized how much my thoughts controlled me until I sought help. That is *one* of my issues and I actually thought for a very long time that I was weak and should be able to control my thoughts- I worked hard daily w/out success and just became more worn down physically, When people are inflicted with intrusive thoughts they beat themselves up more than anyone. Logically, a person will keep saying, "This is BS, I need to stop thinking these thoughts, re-direct... think about all the positive things going on, think of wonderful memories," eg, it's only a temporary (very temporary) reprieve. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a negative Nancy no matter how it may appear when I write. I agree, we can choose our thoughts but we aren't always in control. I appreciate you taking the time to read this. :)20/04/2017 #14 Robert CormackYou'll excuse my language, @Lisa 🐝 Gallagher, but one of the most therapeutic things you can do is tell your brain to "f**k off." I know it sounds crazy but our rambling minds can sometimes create panic that goes way beyond reality. Every time you feel anxious, just use those two little words. Say them to yourself or say them out loud. And just keep saying it until your brain calms down.20/04/2017 #10 Ali Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBeeI just wonder if your attention is spread over many issues if this would lead to increased anxiety @Lisa 🐝 Gallagher! You seem to enjoy trying variety of things and this may ead to some anxiety. I wonder if I am right. Great buzz because you share your own experiences and therefore the reader trusts you. Sharing20/04/2017 #9 Lisa 🐝 Gallagher#8 My son is doing a race at Pikes Peak this summer! Every year my son, my brother, and brother in law do Mt. Evans bike race, it's become a yearly tradition for them. Pikes Peak I've yet to see. I think my son wanted to drive me up there the last time but I said no... Isn't that where you can see the Continental Divide from?
- Producer06/04/2017Lonely Numbers: Demons in my Closet/Monsters in my HeadThis is dedicated to those who feel that suicide is the only answer. Seek help. Be not afraid to take that step in seeking the help you need or of what anyone will think. You are important. Rise up and be strong. Do not succumb to the...
Comments12/04/2017 #17 Joel AndersonThat through any direct or tangential activity in our daily lives, each step-each personal interaction-each scientific discovery can, in their own way, help all of us understand the warning signs, the mechanics behind the gray matter, the "fractals" in our heads and the bifurcating inputs and outputs that morph someone's brain into deviating from one path to another much more devastating and horrific. In understanding the thought processes of our brains, where all hope fades and choices for help and alternatives seem to become all too elusive it is my hope in writing this, that we can share with others that they are not alone.12/04/2017 #16 Joel AndersonI do not care about the politics behind efforts, but we consistently see things like the "Brain Initiative" that has permeated multiple aspects of government sponsored research for advanced technologies. In that initiative and other similar activities I just feel compelled in my personal journey to try and understand it all. Understanding the thought process, striving for a deeper understanding of how the brain works and functions, and despite some of the focus and orientation on technology could have some residual effects on the broader impacts.12/04/2017 #15 Joel AndersonWhen I was younger and experienced extended members of my family that took this path, it was taboo to discuss or even contemplate saying anything to try and understand why, yet alone write about the subject. I fundamentally hope that in doing so, somehow, in our navigating the busy and chaotic "fractals" and experiences of our lives that we can take the time to listen, see and hear and in doing so we can make a difference one person, one step at a time. The statistics remain alarming. The scientific research and deep intellectual capital that has been spent on trying to stem the tide still leaves us scratching our heads with the hind sight questions of why, what did I miss, what could I have done differently, how could someone think this way?12/04/2017 #14 Joel AndersonI have however, been personally affected by it with family, friends and colleagues choosing its path and that is why I wrote this. It is my hope that in putting these thoughts down in writing, trying to think through the things that haunt and persistently dog someone into thinking that suicide is the only alternative, that somehow they can see that there is hope. That others may just struggle with demons in their closet and monsters in their head, yet they keep looking for the dawning of a new day and the continuation of their journeys despite the challenges.12/04/2017 #13 Joel AndersonI am not a polished poet or writer for that matter. I am not a PhD, Scientist or expert in neurology. Whether this poem is an attempt at free verse or narrative or combination there in, it really doesn't matter. I do not feign an answer or any fundamental insight into the mind or the thought process of those who choose this path. Far too often we lose sight that people are behind it all and our collective efforts can lead to new initiatives. understanding and making a difference.08/04/2017 #11 Joel Anderson#9 @Lisa 🐝 Gallagher Thank you and thank you for referencing #WHO #MentalHealthAwareness. The subtleties of one day, one subject and those who struggle that far too often go unnoticed. Know that your insights and passion are truly appreciated. Keeping making a difference.08/04/2017 #7 CityVP 🐝 Manjit#3 One is too many is spot on. BTW I had no idea that Harry Nillson wrote "one is a lonely number", I had assumed it was Amy Mann because it was featured in the movie Magnolia and I did not know that Three Dog NIght were the one's who had the hit with that song. Song is absolutely appropriate for the message being delivered here.08/04/2017 #6 Joel AndersonThanks @Javier 🐝 beBee and @Milos Djukic for sharing this. As I said to @Deb 🐝 Helfrich in my response below: "If this article helps just one person think differently and seek help, or energizes one other to help another in need then it has served its purpose." I struggled with the numbers on the graphic as statistics will point out different daily numbers (22, 41, etc...) but think @Jon Rueck is right, as arbitray as they are, 290 1s get the point across. Regardless the statistics and numbers in and of themselves are alarming. We have to do more to make a difference: one step, one person one life saving conversation at a time. Thank you for helping me do just that by commenting and/or sharing.06/04/2017 #5 Joel Anderson#4 @Deb 🐝 Helfrich Thank you and absolutely agree that one conversation, one observation, one caring comment, and conditioning our selves to hear what is said or in understanding things left unspoken the act of doing so takes concerted concentration and effort but in the end, is worth the time and effort to show someone that we care. "One is too many." If this article helps just one person think differently and seek help, or energizes one other to help another in need then it has served its purpose.06/04/2017 #4 Deb 🐝 HelfrichThank you for a profoundly necessary message, @Joel Anderson. We must acknowledge that part of having a human mind, is that it can conceive of its own end.
It is important we look out for anyone on the verge of an irrevocable decision, as one conversation may be all it takes to see another step forward through whatever fog seems unnavigable in a moment of despair.
- 20/03/2017Beauty does not in our physical being but in our hearts. In our beliefs of what we are capable of. In how we can influence the world in a good way. To show that a physical or mental disability lies simply in the mind of a person and not in the body.To show that all it takes is belief in ourself along with the undaunted support of our loved ones. A inspiration of self-belief and to bring out the best in us even during our worst times.Abandoned Girl got Angel Voice Without Hands Sing n play piano 'Golden Buzzer' Girl without hands sings like an angel a beautiful Lesson of Life. Nothing is Impossible! Follow Your Dream..Follow Your Heart..~Dream will come True. Just...
Comments20/03/2017 #5 CityVP 🐝 Manjit#2 Joyce, while we watch these video's that touch us on an emotional level, there are amazing technological developments in the area of thought controlled prosthetic. https://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/21/technology/a-bionic-approach-to-prosthetics-controlled-by-thought.html
As these technologies mature, the idea of people covering their faces with pity will be less prevalent, and when these times arrive, we will look back at video's like this in the same way we do when we think about novelty acts in PT Barnum circus acts.
Look at the wording above, it leads with "girl without hands sings" - what I see is a human being who knows how to sing, who just happens not to have hands. If we want to change human views about disability, they start with our gut reactions.
I know what you would have seen Joyce, you would have seen the words "Abandoned Girl" and your tears link to this reality more. As we make these realities more explicit, we begin to learn to see the human being and then the innovation that adds new functionality.
The innovation in MS would be a cure for MS. http://www.sciencealert.com/this-radical-new-cure-for-ms-reboots-the-immune-system - these are very tiny steps but the more focus we attend to these steps, the more we set attention towards seeking proactive marvels and transformations through science/tech.20/03/2017 #3 🐝 Fatima G. Williams#1 Thank you to this beautiful girl actually Phil. I cried watching this. Very inspiring young lady. The song she sang is very beautiful too.
"A million stars tonight are rising from your heart
A million dreams will do come true
A million stars tonight make everything go right
‘Cause all those dreams are made for you
Under the shelter of love
We will always survive Sorrow and pain fade away, far away
Love is here to stay"
- Producer20/03/2017What To Do When Someone Tells You You're Not Good EnoughThroughout my career, I've been plagued by people telling me I'm not good enough. I've been rejected for more jobs than I care to remember. I've heard every excuse in the book for not being hired. Some of them were quite absurd and hard to...
Comments21/04/2017 #31 Ella de JongThank you @John White, MBA! for making me watch Sean Stephenson! I love the quote!! "Never believe a prediction that doesn't empower you." .
I've been told "Doing your best is not good enough." at a very important occasion. I was devastated. I'm always impresses by titles and years of experience or education in a field where I just started. But since then, I have found "me": it's my way of training/educating people (not their way, they aren't used to it and I had to fit in). It helped me to put it in some kind of extreme: I want to be a mother Theresa and Vincent van Gogh at the same time. Caring for my attendees and being creative while conducting a training. That's me!
So, it actually helped me, but gosh, what a nightmare it was ...
Glad you made the wise decision so I can read your helpful posts!!22/03/2017 #25 Jerry FletcherJohn,
I've come to the conclusion that there are three kinds of people in the world:
1. Those who don't know what they don't know and hence are not capable of giving advice
2. Those who know what they know and what they don't and can give advice on matters in their knowledge base
3. Those those that ask for advice from the knowledgeable, listen and then find out for themselves.
Of these the last is what I believe we should aim for while avoiding the unsolicited little voice in your head that says, "what makes you think you can..."21/03/2017 #24 Brian McKenzieMost people do not have the spine to have the conversation, "You are not good enough" ~ so they will passively aggressive ghost you in standard non-reply mode and hope you will get the hint......of course they made this grand decision of you in about 6 seconds between their Angry Birds game and live Instagram feed update 8?/ This is both Dating and HR - draw your conclusions and Venn Diagram as you will. PS - the military was always ready and eager to tell you what a worthless piece of shit you were - it built character.21/03/2017 #23 Marisa Fonseca DinizExcellent reflection! All professionals without exception have skills to perform certain functions, but there are few who are able to recognize their failures. It's no use having a huge bag of knowledge and experience if you do not have your self-esteem elevated, for whatever you do will be considered by others a disaster, that's how the world turns. The superego is also not the best solution, but it is what masks the shortcomings of many of the bosses currently employed in the labor market. Throughout my career I have also been rejected several times in companies that I considered excellence, but I realized that many were afraid that I would take on a smaller position and be able to take their position as manager over time, comfortable position of boss, and look that some even came to tell me this, but I never let myself be beaten by the negative words, quite the contrary, then later I realized the good that they themselves had done to me. I would never have the knowledge to grow in my career with people who had nothing to add. Beginning to write a blog, a book or articles is really a very arduous task, especially when we have the ardent desire to show all those who rejected us one day, that we have enough knowledge and experiences to share with anyone who knows nothing, but it is the determination and self-esteem that keep us going. And over time we realize how much being a blogger or writer or an author does us well, and make us leverage not only our career but also highlights us in the environment we live in, that is making a difference, not just behind of an office desk thinking that it is changing the lives of subordinates, the organization, or even their own career. Everyone should experience this experience because they would know where their strengths or weaknesses in their professional career lie.21/03/2017 #22 Aleta CurryAnd not everyone will tell you you're not good enough straight to your face. If it's implied rather than expressed, well, that may be even more destructive. One can respond to a direct put down with a sound 'FU', but when the put down is implicit, it plants insidious seeds of doubt in the mind.
Then there are those who tell you what you can't do out of sincere desire to keep you from failing.
Thanks, John for another thought-provoking article.21/03/2017 #21 Liesbeth Leysen, MSc. Brand Ambassador beBee, Inc.this is really a beautiful message @John White, MBA, you will touch many hearts with it!21/03/2017 #20 Robert CormackVery interesting post, @John White, MBA. I've had my share of firings and toxic bosses as well. Interestingly enough, every time I've been fired, my boss has said "You do good work, Robert, but we're letting you go." I may write about this one day. It seems the day you stop nodding your head, you're a target. Head nodders always last longer than head shakers. Nobody has a problem with a "kiss ass" but if you fight, you have legions of people wishing you'd just go away. Thanks for the post.21/03/2017 #19 Steve JonesJohn thanks for writing this. I occasionally ask myself what motivates me and one thing I always come back to was back in the late 1970's when I totally messed up my GCSE's, (too much partying). My English teacher told me I would never amount to anything so I left school with very few qualifications and have WORKED ever since. I have never been out of work, even after redundancy. I'm lucky to have met and worked with some fantastic people over the years who have helped and supported me, but I'd also like to thank my English teacher who told me I'd never be good enough.21/03/2017 #18 Anonymous@John White, MBA Great to hear a story of recognition of what holds us back and what supports us in moving forward in our lives. If I surround myself with people who have higher expectations of me that I have of myself, then I will exceed my own expectations. My grandparents, my parents, my wife, my first manager, my friend who taught me squash, my friends, I can recite a long list of those who had higher expectations of me than I had of myself. There is a long list of detractors and belittlers but their names and roles have been crossed out so heavily I can't recall the names. Kia Kaha John, you do good service here.21/03/2017 #15 Lisa 🐝 GallagherThis article still inspires me @John White, MBA. For some reason, some people's titles have intimidated me. I think it depends on how they treat others with regards to being intimidated. I just wrote a small story about midlife and some feelings/fears I'm facing. My husband said, "Why do you write negative things when you do so many positive things in life?" I told him, I write what comes to mind and my writing does depend on my mood. Even articles that some may view as negative well, others can relate and I've found it can start conversations that lead to putting our heads together. At other times I admit, it's just cathartic. By the way, @David B. Grinberg tagged you, your company & I added your publications to the tag on my last post which is on Thriveglobal. You are an inspiration to so many and one day I would love to chat with you on the phone when you have time. I have a few ideas and I could use sound advice from someone like yourself! Kudos to you for ignoring the haters and letting them ignite your flame!21/03/2017 #13 Laura Donnelly@John White, MBA - enjoyed this post --- what helped me was accepting that I was good enough (coming from a family of perfectionists, this was a big step for me!) This quote: "Always remember, the people who say you can't do something can't do it either!" So true - and when you do it, they really don't like you, so better to leave them in the dust!21/03/2017 #12 CityVP 🐝 Manjit#5 This is very topical because I saw an interview with Matt Damon where the interviewer asked how his mentor in what was a regular school in Boston end up producing three Oscar winners in Damon, the two Afleck brothers. It is the way he fondly remembered his mentors that showed me just how many people in life are unsung heroes.
I believe that when we have that level of gratitude, that emotive energy can be sufficient to override the negative batteries that drain us of energy and life.
We know when we come across a negative battery, for their only purpose is to drain us, and so it is important to recognize these effects but also supplement positive effects that Matt Damon expressed in his great affection and tribute to his high school drama teacher, a man who selflessly taught his art so others could achieve the impossible dreams. We cannot let our lives be defined by tormentors when there are these mentors that you have expressed in our life.
- Producer13/03/2017The Price of BeansI wrote this during difficult times. My point, however subtle, was that bullying has a distinct cost to society. I experienced bullying in school, and it was terribly disruptive to my education. I implored school officials to intervene to no avail....
Comments14/03/2017 #12 Sandra 🐝 Smith#11 You raise a really important topic here Joyce. Bullying is widespread, and often authorities are out of touch with who is causing the problem, or reluctant to 'lay blame.' This means the bullied end up withdrawing and become further isolated. I read a heartbreaking story on Yahoo the other day about a 14 year old girl who took her own life after being online. It's not just in person now...14/03/2017 #9 Liesbeth Leysen, MSc. Brand Ambassador beBee, Inc.this article is a good deed thank you @Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee14/03/2017 #8 Lisa 🐝 GallagherPeople have been brainwashed in this country to believe that Social programs and expansion programs IE: Medicaid are free give outs to lazy people. They don't put a lot of thought into the long term effects these programs have, everyone becomes a dollar sign to others and kids get lost in the fray thanks to decisions Adults make- decisions Politicians make and those who listen to ditto heads instead of trying to become self educated are enablers of the lies, enablers of a price tag placed on everyone.. which happens to be a very low price tag if you are not part of the Elite in our society.14/03/2017 #7 Sara JacoboviciThanks for tagging me @Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee. You are calling out that the Emperor has no clothes. The tragedy is that most people are turning a deaf ear. "Falling through the cracks" is a phrase I despise. I have heard it too often across the board when it comes to education and health and mental health care. We can analyse and develop theories as to what led us to these cracks and how we respond to their existence, but that is like laying some cement over the crack and pretending the reason the crack is there is in the first place went away. Right now, anything good is coming from individuals like yourself and groups made up of individuals like yourself, who are Aristotle's gadflies (yes it goes way back). There is a reason for the expression, "It takes a village to raise a child." No one, not one parent, not one teacher, not one health care professional, can do it alone. The community needs to be a strong foundation in which, if cracks appear, they're filled in quickly and appropriately, by rallying around the child together. Wishing you (and us) all the strength. A difficult battle but one worth investing the effort in.14/03/2017 #6 Deb 🐝 Helfrich@Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee this highlights something I believe strongly, we have let our society build up rules that separate us, and allow us to live in fear and we simply don't even see how unloving and unsupportive something as crucial as the education of our children has become. It is all about statistics, when it should be all about caring.
If we look at anyone who commits an atrocity there was a long line of people - not by any stretch just the parents - who did not have enough adequate support to figure out how to turn a troubled child into a productive person.
We have to stop caring about financial results and return to caring about humanity.
- Producer20/02/2017Baby DoeThis is a difficult piece for me. I remind myself every day that five children in the US will die today. Baby Doe already had her deathday. She is, for me, a poster-child for what happens when we deny the incredulous—parents and caretakers kill and...
Comments20/02/2017 #7 🐝 Fatima G. WilliamsThis is very sad @Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee An episode liked this happened hardly a week ago. A 7 year old Little girl Hasini was abused and killed out of fear Rather was burnt to her death by her neighbouring Boy 22 year old engineering very good looking student. ( Can be googled) Very depressing to hear. May her soul R.I.P and all little girls who had died cause of some heartless swines.
When I think of people who behave like this. I just want their brains to explode with some feelings or conscienceness of their actions. #Hopingforabetterworld20/02/2017 #5 Todd Jones#4 Worse than animals, these people. The lottery of birth is apparently no different for children than it is for a dog. I have been pushed to my limit of anguish today. My deepest respect for you, and the incredibly difficult toil of social workers that labor in the trenches of suffering every single day.
- Producer14/02/2017The PursuitThe pursuit was on. Equality of the contestants was not issue. Their goals were not the same. The stalker had in mind to catch her prey, who wanted only to escape. Survival was the issue here. The prey would do what it had to to survive....
Comments15/02/2017 #5 Praveen Raj Gullepalli#4 Well as a kid I performed the craziest of escapes to avoid a hair cut...chased half a mile across the neighbourhood by an uncle... even hid in a trunk half a day on one occasion...child's play can go either way! Sad to realise it was a misleading designation in your case though. And there goes the childhood!
- Producer13/02/2017My Story of AbuseWhat is the view of child abuse? I struggle with that question. I've found that child abuse survivors are viewed as damaged goods. I see pity in people’s eyes. I say, don’t see me and my ordeal—understand that there are children out there right...
Comments13/02/2017 #9 CityVP 🐝 Manjit#7 Last year there was a site called about.com and they had this facility called "collections", where you collect people under their interests - I thought the idea was brilliant and I ended up setting up 95 categories and had read and collected over +5000 profiles.
Then someone there decided that they were going to a new system and announced that in the "collections" pages will be scrapped. It was their site and their decision. This is how marketed human beings are - it has nothing to do with personal. They were not interested in what this media meant to people, it did not fit their business model and so employed a more simpler model of focusing on personal brand.
In noticing your fight it is not the first time I have come across people with your fighting spirit. At about.com I had come across over 20. Just like that the site was wiped clean of all collections, but not before I realized that some people dedicate their "work" to this form of seeking justice for others. Abuse does not start as canyons, it starts as tiny cracks.
What you write is tell your story, but what you actually do is fight for justice. That was the name of that collection I once had at about.com "fight for justice". I have zero respect today for about.com but plenty of respect for the stories of those people I encountered, people whose names I should have recorded but did not because I naively thought info on a cloud stayed there.13/02/2017 #6 CityVP 🐝 ManjitWhen I first found the web my curiosity revealed my naivety. The first niche social network site I joined was back in 1998 and the site called yoni.com and such was my naivety that even as I interacted in the discussions there, I did not know what a yoni was. The moment I saw what it was, I could not believe that I could not see it, it was just a case of OMG.
That OMG pales in comparison to one particular discussion I had. The discussion was about bulimia. As a naive individual I wanted to understand bulimia and why this condition of self-image effected women. One of the answers I received I was not ready for and even today the chill of the answer registers to my bone.
I was curious enough to initiate a private chat with one of the women who took part in this group. It is in this conversation that I both realized that I had ventured into something much bigger than me and that I was a million miles removed from.
I asked this woman about bulimia and explain what it was. I will never forget her answer. She told me that as a child her father asked her mother to hold her while the mother watched and he would thrust his penis into her mouth. If this isn't horrific enough, this woman was disabled and so was objectified as a thing by her parents.
This discussion group that discussed bulimia was a gathering place for women like her to share their humanity and not simply there misery, this was not a place where someone liked me belonged. What did I get from that woman is the hidden truth of what sits behind these conditions that we call bulimia. This was one woman's story about what happened to her. One is enough.
It is not bulimia I am talking about here it is abuse. Later I discovered the horrific accounts of disabled people to widespread abuse simply because they were disabled. Those that want meaning to be about work miss the meaning of home, they miss this.
- 13/02/2017@Eva Pérez Duque brought my attention to a problem of streetcalling in Latin America - it is not that I can solve it, but being aware of this means I can make one more person I know aware of it.Buenos Aires Wants to Outlaw Catcallswww.citylab.com Officials in Argentina, and beyond, are finally taking catcalls more...
- Producer12/02/2017TurmoilHe’s dead. She wondered how those words would feel rolling off her tongue: She toyed with them, letting them trickle through the screams drifting through her head. He’s dead. She looked at the silent form beside her: a boy lying on an...
Comments12/02/2017 #11 John ValledorArtists use colors on canvas in unique shades, patterns, and strokes to share and convey one-of-a-kind impressions. Joyce, your clever use of words--strung together uniquely, eloquently--conveyed an indelible image (impression) in my mind (the anonymous reader). I felt as if I was truly present in that emergency room--powerful. For me, that puts you on par with artists that create similar magic on canvas. #10
- 08/02/2017Cry…let the hero take a seat!donnaluisawordslayer.wordpress.com Mr. Achilles and my heel! I had to see a new doctor today for an evaluation. I’m just so tired of having to rehash November, 2014. I’d like to forget it. Every time I think I’ve...
Comments21/02/2017 #12 Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBeeBeautifully put. I can so relate. I remember the doctor telling me I have MS and asking, "So how do we fix this." I knew what her answer would be. I strive to be stronger even when I can't. In simple terms, it sucks to feel helpless. Hope you have recovered.09/02/2017 #9 Donna-Luisa EversleyHahaha, trust you to make me feel on top of the world with a few strokes of the pen @Ken Boddie. Thank you. That outpouring was a mere hour after the visit, and it felt good after letting it out. A little vulnerability every now and then is cathartic .
So what have you gone and done with your back. Gymnastics and jumping off planes are for James Bond! I do hope you feel better soon. I like your thought of a series of tunnels. Thought at the end of one that was it, but they do persist. Its a good thing my melancholy state remains for very short infrequent periods :-) Thanks my friend #409/02/2017 #5 Devesh 🐝 Bhatteither now or for times gone by,
If you hurt, you must cry.
Even tigers shed some tears.
When sly men attack with poisoned spears.
They cry for strength, live and endure.
A few days slow, he feasts on boar
Silly silly mashup translation
Cry a little. Smile a little. Have a feast.09/02/2017 #4 Ken BoddieYou asked if any of your post resonates with us. Well here I am, flat on my back in bed, recovering from food poisoning, and I've put my back out again. But hey, I'm stuck in a short tunnel and the light at the end is clear and bright. Sounds like your tunnel may be a bit longer and the light more difficult to see. Or else you've just come out of one tunnel to go into another. Just remember that every tunnel has a light at the end. Sometimes we may not know where it is yet but deep down we know it's there. And if that light happens to be a train coming towards you, step aside, count to ten, then move forward again. You can cry if you want. You can do anything you want. After all, you're DLE from T&T. 😀
- Producer05/02/2017The 6 Toxic Beliefs That Makes Your Life DifficultThe thing that makes your life difficult is produced in your mind, it controls you and make problems manifest into your experience. If you do not collapse and let go of your toxic beliefs, it will continue to control you, produce the cycle of...
- 02/02/2017Sometimes I say to myself "just shut up and observe" and then having observed, take a deep breath and honour what it is you have seen. The play Wit by Margaret Edson is to observe that which I would not wish upon my worst enemy - the experiences from cancer treatmentThe Play Wit- 2001 (Margaret Edson) Wit by Margaret...
- Producer15/11/2016Love hurtsIt's Care-giver month again....think I'll have a nap. Don't get me wrong - for other carers, I care. I'm sure they do a stellar job and remain blissful, serene and contented. Well done!Alas, I'm the other type: bemused, confused and cranky with it!...
Comments02/02/2017 #17 Lisa VanderburgI am humbled at your considered understanding and empathy, Sir! You've clearly identified this 'dance' we're in - a little like the film 'They shoot horses, don't they'; we're both fairly knackered and probably should be melted down for soap:) I spent a few years writing about the med side of PD, but it sort of seems a little like I've run out of words for the time being. For my hubby who puts up with my endless crap, we have a lot of laughs based on the British-way-of-caustic-wit: sarcasm. That gets us through!
Thank you kindly @CityVP 🐝 Manjit for adding those links; especially that righteous video! I'm grateful!02/02/2017 #16 CityVP 🐝 ManjitIt altered my view of love when I first visited England and saw my aunt as a carer and all that she had to do to look after my uncle whose Parkinson's steadily got worse. Over successive years I learned how unforgiving Parkinson's is. It was made even more tough because my uncle was a naturally a fiercely independent man, who found it difficult to be subjected to loss of control.
I tried looking after him for just one day - one day when I discovered to experience life living in my aunt shoes and by the days end I was exhausted, and it was beyond me how she did this day in day out - how can observing this not alter my view of what love is.
The luxury I had is that I was there on a business trip and I got to get back home. Through this buzz I am learning for the first time highly detailed interventions. I checked out DBS, RBD and PLDM
DBS = http://www.parkinson.org/understanding-parkinsons/treatment/surgery-treatment-options/Deep-Brain-Stimulation
PLDM = http://www.mountain-sleep.com/index.php/sleep-disorders/plmd-rls
So the gravity of the words "Still, my beloved – the one I choose to love daily" is that much more powerful to absorb.
The carer is not spared but can fight back in small ways and it is a privelege to have read this buzz, for the creativity and spirit, as also shown in this video "Parkinsons is a Thief" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=InFY3s-UgY016/11/2016 #14 Cyndi wilkins#7 The wave hit hard...an ocean of emotion...I'm still picking the seaweed out of my hair...But I'm getting there;-) Yeah, that whole sickness and in health thing isn't all it's cracked up to be...Don't get me wrong...I love, honor and respect the kind of love that it takes to be a care giver...But sometimes it hurts like hell...experiences like this will awaken that sleeping dragon in anyone...I suppose if it were easy, there would be no lesson in it...We are all our own greatest teachers...sending you LOVE:-)16/11/2016 #11 Lisa Vanderburg#10 I hear you, @Irene Hackett! It seems wimmin are bent to this role; God love the male care-givers, but they are a rarer breed....must be the anticipation thing; we corral wobbling toddlers and crashing kids, so it's just an ergonomic problem :) Just for laughs: my father died in 2010 - I had been assisting my step-mother in his care. It was my night - his last. He was his usual cranky self (not in pain, mercifully) and was struggling to get out one side of the bed which was blocked, while I tried to steer him to the other side. He got so mad he had his final event. His last words were, 'oh SHUT UP woman!!'15/11/2016 #8 Lisa Vanderburg#5 You called it dead to rights, @Deb 🐝 Helfrich! It crept up slowly - all this....mayhem. I think I have come to terms with my 'lot'. I have no illusions as to what the future holds, so I set my eyes on the goal: to be in control when the proverbial really hits the fan! After that, I imagine no more - it's not of consequence. That's not a sentimental statement or plan, it's merely the truth! To think my sister (years back) used to believe in reincarnation - ha! I'd say to her, 'who in their right mind would want to come back to this world of pain??' But I could think of less-lived lives!15/11/2016 #7 Lisa Vanderburg#6 Good Lord @Cyndi Wilkins - I am so very sorry for your angst. I can totally empathise when you say, ''The only saving grace for me is that he also suffers dementia and has no memory of what has happened to him...'' You HAD to put him in a nursing home: you had no choice, and I hope you're not still beating yourself up for that. I have the dubious benefit of having to care for my spouse until 'death do us part'. That gives me the onus to be both pit-bull and dragon for him (the upside :) ), and I apologise in advance for those that will feel my wrath should they ignore or neglect my charge! The lines are just too bleary when it's your parent - it warms my heart though; you're clearly mutual love.15/11/2016 #6 Cyndi wilkins"But I’ll tell you what’s exhausting: anticipation. To have to be on full-alert for when he’s going to ‘go’ (potential fall), to know when he’s going to crash into something or other requires a fair amount of following like a guard-dog." Oh dear Lisa....I feel this soooooo profoundly right now...I've been living this nightmare of dragons and demons ever since I found my dad one morning several weeks ago like a turtle on his back in the bath tub...He had a stroke as he was making his way to the bathroom in the night and fallen over...I thank God every day that he was still conscious and not severely injured, however the stroke took it toll...After several weeks of trying desperately to care for him at home I have had to make the heart wrenching decision to put him in a nursing home...The emotional backlash is like being dragged into an undertow and not being able to surface for air...The only saving grace for me is that he also suffers dementia and has no memory of what has happened to him...My heart goes out to you.15/11/2016 #5 Deb 🐝 HelfrichFrom my humble perspective, embodying the dragon, for your own good, is the most sane approach. Get thee to someone who can begin to comprehend. It is isolating trying to explain something that is inexplicable.
And self-care! I see the challenge so clearly. The need for vigilance. But that very vigilance is actually probably part of what created the situation to begin with. It will be reflected back on you at the most poignant of moments. After caring for weeks non-stop, the slightest diversion of focus will result in some sort of catastrophe either physical, or much, much worse, the allegation that insinuates that you have been selfish.
In a very tiny, miniscule way, I can identify the cycle with my puppy days. It wasn't the damage to the objects being chewed so much as the inability to see chewing and swallowing as harmful that ravages the companion's mind, which is walking its own tightrope of sleep depravation. Wondering if there are any puppy-proofing sorts of options in your vastly more complex scenario?
Caring about you from afar!15/11/2016 #3 Lisa Vanderburg#1 Oh, I am touched by your words and your wisdom my friend, @Ali Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee! I am so far from a super-anything, I look at amoebas in awe :)
Life is one long prat-fall; a losing battle with decrepitude. It's the same for everyone - those with chronic disease (especially neurodegenerative) just KNOW they're losing earlier. Borrowing from your pensive and beautiful buzz, Adaptations to Emotional Flooding, I just have a little root-rot!15/11/2016 #1 Ali Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBeeI am deeply touched by your buzz @Lisa Vanderburg. Your story is full of anticipation and I understand fully your saying that anticipation makes us edgy. I almost "melted" like an ice cube while reading " I have strong opinions, but clearly more lily-livered about my own set of values, because the lines keep changing or blurring. They didn’t always. If it appears I’m describing a stranger; we’re getting closer"! This is a deep description of many of us and I am not sure I could ever expose my feelings so eloquently and creatively. I wonder how do you make the time to write and comment. You are a super human.
- Producer29/01/2017Surrendering to CourageWe belongThis was written a number of weeks ago, and maybe its the time to be published. Right now 'courage' is needed more than before in my lifetime and maybe yours. I have a vested interest in this world, and so do you. We live here. We breathe...
Comments28/02/2017 #47 Savvy RajA beautiful dedication to the spirit of courage in us all dear @Donna-Luisa Eversley.and I loved and reread these lines which I certainly believe in .
We all have it - courage, but it stays hidden until we let it out!
In a world where all we see is war, I pray for peace, love, and everyone.04/02/2017 #46 🐝 Fatima G. Williams" You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face " #quoteunknown
But this is what comes to my mind when I read this buzz. I see a women challenging fear and who has gained confidence, courage and a beautiful soul every step moving forward. #bebeesforver :)04/02/2017 #45 Sushmita Thakare Jain#44 Ohh my my...i'm missing out on wonderful posts out here...
Well all face the Courage in some form or the other each day
I connect with you emotinally, its difficult to find your Courage and surrender to it...but thats required...
Thank you for tagging me in...📝01/02/2017 #38 Brian McKenzieThere is no money in Peace - if there was; that would be breaking out everywhere. Fear and Low Info are the payday for Money and Power - and they have been that way for Millennia. It will not change in our life time. The current color revolutions in play by Soros & Clinton prove that. It's a recipe as old as Marx - too bad too few care to read it. Too bad so many still crave and love the Pavlovian Kibble.01/02/2017 #37 Lisa 🐝 GallagherMy grandfather served in WWI- just not to date myself too much, I had a much older grandfather. My other grandfather served during WWII and my dad during the Korean War. They all signed up voluntarily, so I came from a family of strong men, sadly they all left too soon. It was my mother who raised 5 children on a mealy wage that inspired me to dream, anything is possible and to never give up. Times have been tough lately. I have been more silent because my brain is trying to heal. But, in numbers there is strength and I/WE shall prevail! PS: Marches coming up, speaking of strength in numbers: https://www.facebook.com/groups/progressivearmy/events/ Thanks @Donna-Luisa Eversley01/02/2017 #35 Pamela 🐝 WilliamsBeing the daughter & sister of service men who faced 'the enemy' in Korea, Vietnam, and the Gulf, the former wife of a police officer and a single mother for my daughter's entire life, I can say this; courage is love in it's purest form. We can try to separate them, but they are one and the same. I did not see myself as courageous for being a single mother because I love my daughter so much there is nothing I won't do, nothing I won't sacrifice for her well-being and happiness.
When my brother left this earth I was his executor and supervised all the funeral arrangements. A cousin came up to me at the services and whispered: "You're the strongest person I've ever met". I wasn't strong., I wanted to scream at everything and everybody, BUT, my brother had suffered mentally and emotionally his entire life and because of this many looked down on him. I was going to make damn sure that his passing was seen as a great loss to us, because it was. Courage is love. Love will give you the strength of 10.30/01/2017 #31 Aleta CurryThank you for this reminder, @Donna-Luisa Eversley. I believe in courage; I've seen it in action. I won't piggy-back on your post, so I'll save the story for another day, but I know what's in us and I believe humans summon up the best when their backs are to the wall.30/01/2017 #30 Laura MikolaitisA timely and relevant buzz @Donna-Luisa Eversley. One of my favorite quotes about courage: "“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow.” ~ Mary Anne Radmacher. I love this quote because courage does come in all shapes and sizes, and it resides within us even when we don't realize that it is there. We are presented with circumstances and challenges every step of the way so I believe that courage definitely plays a part in helping us along the way. Lately, for me, it has been that little voice at the end of the day. Thanks for a lovely piece of writing and reflection, Donna.
- Producer23/01/2017Difficult times make you strongerInspirational Uplifting Quotes For Difficult Times If you’re going through a rough time, reading some uplifting quotes can help you remember that life isn’t always bad.Every struggle in your life has shaped you into the person you are today....
Comments02/02/2017 #67 Preston 🐝 Vander VenA great analogy of a difficult time in life is like a fire. It can be used for something of beauty or it can be ignored. Imagine a difficult time in life as an obstacle that we learn from. When we do this, you and I are like Silver or Gold put into the fire. Yes, it hurts, but through this learning process we can be refined stronger and more pure. We learned from our mistake and now we can move on.
If we choose to ignore that the difficulty exist's or play the "Blame Game", it can run wild and destroy everything in our path.26/01/2017 #64 Mohammed SultanDifficult times always reveal the "teachable moments" from which you should benefit..Do't use the word mistake but talk about the challenge.When you do a mistake but you do't learn the lesson you are going to be passed over even if you are in the right track.To be strong means your attitude will always be aligned to creating opportunities rather than solving problems.Doing mistakes but learning from them will even make you stronger and when you become stronger, you will be looked at as a "guarantee" of being responsible rather than casting blame.25/01/2017 #58 Graham🐝 Edwards"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat." - Teddy Roosevelt25/01/2017 #57 Renée 🐝 Cormier"There are no problems; only solutions." My former boss used to say this all the time. It resonated with me because it is true. Every challenge in life is only as challenging as we perceive it to be. If you focus on moving forward, you will realize you never really had a problem. Life is all about the choices we make. Choose solutions over problems, positivism over negativity, progress over stagnation, happiness over misery...25/01/2017 #56 Mohammed SultanEverybody can be strong- that's easy; but to be strong to rapidly bounce back from failure and see an opportunity in every setback and to be optimistic in a sea of bad news ,that's not within the strength of everyone and is not easy.Thank you @Javier beBee or sharing such inspirational quotes.
- Producer24/01/2017SYSTEM FAILURE- A SOCIAL MALICE?Aloke Majumder, a promising entrepreneur, is truly become successful in a very short span of time. After completing his engineering studies from a premium institution of the country, instead of accepting lucrative job from reputed M.N.C’s, he...
Comments27/01/2017 #6 Ali Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBeeThis is truly a sad story dear @debasish majumder. Greed led to the loss of lives and leaving behind two orphaned children. When we cheat and expose other peoples' lives to the risk of death we forget we expose ours as well. A terrific story and the lessons are deep.
- Producer07/01/2017On the Limits of Free ExpressionWE MAY ALL HAVE THE RIGHT TO FREELY EXPRESS IDEAS AND OPINIONS BUT IS ANYONE OBLIGATED TO LISTEN, LET ALONE ANSWER ...The issue of what is and what isn't acceptable expression on social media comes up frequently, particularly on platforms such as...
Comments23/01/2017 #85 Donna-Luisa Eversley@Phil Friedman had a slower read of this super post and find it even more relevant today in a broader sense than when you first published. I appreciate my freedom of speech more now than ever before. I even appreciate my freedom of choice to listen, respond , follow and engage with others worldwide, many of whom must be guarded in their own responses, for fear of possible reprisals. Social media may bring us closer as units of this world but it also makes it a lot easier to divide us all.
Just thinking out loud while reading :-)09/01/2017 #82 Phil Friedman#80 Excellent simile, Pascal. It's where I've finally arrived after several years. 1) On MY posts I speak my mind. If you come onto my post to comment, then expect that I will respond. If you don't want that, don't come to the comments on MY posts. And let's drop the "Phil's a meany and started it all when he hit me back." 2) I am making an extra effort to respect the sensitivities of others these days by not making critical comments on the posts of others unless a) I've been invited to comment by a tag or a shout out, or b) I have an established relationship with the author of the post and know he or she will accept the critical comment for what it is. 3) I leave it to management to eject rowdy, obnoxious fellow-customers — although I personally prefer that management exercise that prerogative sparingly. Thanks for joining the conversation. You make a lot of sense, as usual.09/01/2017 #80 Pascal DerrienI was thinking in very practical terms that social media is you do what you want in your own house, you respect other users in a public park and the management reserves the right to admission to the restaurant providing you comply with basic rules of engagement otherwise you can be escorted out thru the exit door... :-)09/01/2017 #78 Phil Friedman#76 Donna-Luisa, you are, I think, correct. There is always a tension between a desire for intellectual engagement and the need to protect oneself from emotional predators.
To my mind, "trolls" almost always fall into the latter category. For they literally draw sustenance from the negative emotional energy they elicit. And in some cases, it becomes a game of King of the Hill -- which is why it is so distressing to them to be ignored.
As true bullies, they've learned as well that making people uncomfortable frequently gets the what they want, in a recreation of buy-the-bully-off, otherwise known as the Stockholm Syndrome. As always, thank you for you insight and thoughtful comments. Cheers!09/01/2017 #77 Phil Friedman#75 Mohammed, thank you for reading and commenting. I understand your concern and the moral imperative which you recommend. And I have sometimes been able to act in accord with it -- in several instances using tolerance and playfulness to draw out a supposed troll into communicating openly without a hidden agenda, and becoming part of the community.
In some few cases it works, and is gratifying But most times it doesn't. Because, I 've concluded, such people usually do not want to join a community. For they truly lack empathy and see others as objects to be used. And are most times, are best ignored.09/01/2017 #76 Donna-Luisa Eversley@Phil Friedman I have noted your efforts to ignore being baited and found one individual quite upset and persistent by your lack of response on one of your posts. I was confused initially about why you did not respond as it became creepy and obsessive. It was interesting to watch, but also uncomfortable. I am guilty at times of really shying away from negativity which is offensive. However, I have learnt in 2016 that I don't need to read or respond to anyone I choose not to engage with. Your discussion on free speech matters , because it is critical to deffrentiate between trollish behavior and an opinion of disagreement. The lines seem blurred on what offends sometimes, and it can be quite subjective. My only fear and concern is we lose when all thoughts mirror our own and there is no yin to yang. Disagreement can protect against fake or fraudulent information dispensed via social media by psudeo experts. Quite an interesting discussion and much needed.09/01/2017 #75 Mohammed Sultan@ Phil Friedman.Fruity trees are always thrown by stones.You either ignore the troll or support him.Those irrational people are acting emotionally ,so they need to be understood and supported until they balance their emotion with reason.In the workplaces there's many who are trolling others ideas because no body listened to their ideas.We always advice companies not to suppress their views or get them blamed for their behavior because they are often me - too people.Their capabilities depends more on their feelings ,emotions and hidden knowledge rather than relationships with others.Show them the glint of light on their broken heart after they had trolled.Kant the French philosopher said "In how a man is guilty,who he violates the rights of others,in ethics he is guilty if he only thinks of doing this." Phil, patience is a true sign of authenticity that provides you with the energy to go further.09/01/2017 #72 Phil Friedman#71 Thanks, Franci, for reading and joining the conversation. For the most part, I agree with your summary. I am moved, however, to caution everyone about the too-free use of sanctions. In the matter of freedom of expression, I think it is always better on social media to err on the side of being too liberal, and use official sanctions only when it is obvious that the issue cannot be cleared up by the free reigning interactions of the community. Cheers and best wishes to you for the new year 2017.09/01/2017 #71 Franci🐝Eugenia HoffmanThank you for your professional approach to freedom of expression, Phil. Perhaps, a fragile subject but one worthy of being addressed. We can agree and we can disagree (not referencing you and me, per se), and that's fine because if we didn't we would be complacent and drab souls. If we don't test the waters, then we don't know which way the river flows.
IMO, your post is more about freedom of speech than trolls. And it is about writers: those who use written words in various styles and techniques to communicate their ideas.
And it is about listeners(commenters) and their freedom of expression. Both the writer and listener(commenter) should be respected and show respect, as well.
With that said, relating specifically to beBee we have a gift at our fingertips where we can meet, greet, engage, discuss and have freedom of expression and freedom of listening(commenting). I feel it ours to use, but not abuse and not let anyone else abuse it, as well. @Javier 🐝 beBee has proven that abuse will not be tolerated, which is one of the reasons I'm proud to be a bee.
To sum up, my rambling, IMO, it boils down to respect.
Buzz on and be the best you can bee.08/01/2017 #68 Anonymous#66 @Phil Friedman, This is the one of the key aspects necessary for sustainable development of any social network. Unpleasant experiences and unrealistically high expectations and hopes, in contact with other people on social media, should not cause disappointment and loss of faith in humanity, kindness and the importance of helpfulness.08/01/2017 #67 Phil Friedman#62 Tetyana, thank you for commenting. I cannot speak to the charge that there are paid professional trolls on social media, who are agents of various governments, and that such agents use complaints and reporting functions to silence critics of their masters. But I can see that it is definitely a danger. Which is why it is so important to protect the rights of the minority to speak freely against any possible tyranny of the majority. And to make sure that the reporting function is not used unfairly as a tool of repression. Cheers!08/01/2017 #66 Phil Friedman#57 #61 Milos and David, in the main, I agree with both of you. David makes an important point: It is critical to avoid allowing the reporting functions from being used as tools of retaliation and vendetta. The only way to accomplish that is to assure that every complaint is properly investigated before action is taken against the user being reported. As well, I think it important to understand that simply not liking or being made uncomfortable by what somebody says is NOT, nor should it be sufficient for having that person's account closed down. Freedom of expression has primarily to do with protecting the rights of the minority (or less powerful in the situation) from the overbearing power of the majority (or the more powerful in the situation).
I think it should also be recognized that some bees might be upset by what some users say, but that in itself is not sufficient to squelch the speaker's free expression. I was aghast recently by reading a comment by a beBee user that lauded some of Hitler's ideas. And so I muted that bee, and when the block function goes live, I will block that person as well. However, I would not want that person's account closed down simply because I found the remark offensive and unacceptable. For that would itself do more damage to free expression than the objectionable remark itself.
I think Milos lays out some useful criteria in intention, form, and function. And I believe further that a balanced objectivity must be maintained.
That said, I for one trust @Javier beBee and the beBee administration to act with care and good judgment, as has been amply evidenced to date. Cheers!08/01/2017 #65 Anonymous"Philanthropy"
"1. The effort or inclination to increase the well-being of humankind, as by charitable aid or donations.
2. Love of humankind in general.
3. Something, such as an activity or institution, intended to promote human welfare."
- From thefreedictionary.com (http://www.thefreedictionary.com/Philantropy)
- Producer06/01/2017CONUNDRUM WITH BRAND VALUE!Modern world invoke to create brand Whether personal or organizational, in grand Human beings, a social creature They genuinely having a tendency to promote an affinity of mixture To churn out with a prolific gesture Beckoning...
Comments07/01/2017 #5 Ali Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBeeDear @debasish majumder- nothing turns people blind as much as greed in my opinion. We see it everywhere such as the sock markets worldwide where greed drives people to great losses. Greed that says me only and if I win and others lose it is ok. So, this part of your poem resonated strongly with me
Only impregnated with mere greed
Is it containing any holy essence?
Where greed is rudimentary in its presence
Why we only trigger to develop brand
What is exactly grand, apart from gross errant?07/01/2017 #4 CityVP 🐝 ManjitDebasish I discovered that I was born with a personal brand gag reflex. Lately I was doing so well after a few decade finally trying to embrace this reality that we are all branded property, and now having read this I have fallen back to square one again.
It all began with a Tom Peters article back before the age of 40 https://www.fastcompany.com/28905/brand-called-you because there was something intrinsically wrong with comparing our lives as something that Procter and Gamble or Unilever would sell.
Brand was great for product that is until we all officially became product courtesy of "Brand You".
- 26/12/2016Dulce Pontes - Lagrima ....nao te quero, eu digo que nao te quero, y de noite, de noite sonho comtigo...(...I don't love you, I say I don't love you, and at night I dream of...
Comments26/12/2016 #1 CityVP 🐝 ManjitProfound depth and a beautiful voice and composition. It represents for me the profound nature of experience, where sadness and the things in life we die to are not a death but a becoming and a humanity within us, that shape wisdom if we are capable of knowing this depth and where we have the courage or capacity to grow from the sensitivity of our own experiences.
- Producer20/12/2016Black Mirror: What If I Can Only Hear You?You give me different names, you have written so many different stories about me in so many different languages that it’s hard to believe I was just a man.You talked about love and about all things above and then you started to build a bomb with a...
Comments21/12/2016 #45 Praveen Raj Gullepalli#44 Good narrative however. But I never cease to be stymied at the fact that so few...sometimes just one individual...can do /does so much damage while the millions and billions of others...with righteousness on their side, and so much collective strength, allow such damage to be done. Of course they do have their reasons but the fact remains.21/12/2016 #43 Harvey Lloyd#41 No i really don't have much to comment to the religious aspects of the comment. Our spiritual journey is our own and yes i have a spiritual leader but it is not necessary for you to agree or disagree. I guess the focus of my comment was that mankind will decide its own fate.
I would rather die fighting for mankind than be drawn into a endless debate about who's fault it is. God or evolution may have created the world but, it is clear to me, we can make of it what we want. Those who profit from the debate of dichotomy's are the ones with the microphones. I am challenged by those who support their false arguments and join the herd. They will have made their riches and died while we suffer under their past ideals.21/12/2016 #42 Praveen Raj GullepalliI have always believed that it is the capricious, selfish blinded-by-reason Human that walks away or turns away from the Divine and not the other way around dear Pascal! And it is always the Human/s who empower another Human (actively or passively) to grow into a monster. By not acknowledging the right of all other Humans to live a dignified and happy life and supporting it forthright.21/12/2016 #41 Pascal Derrien#39 I think I like the analogy ''Many more will die in the fight of mankind'' and also that religion is a distraction comment. It would probably encompass what I was trying to say with my own words, indeed I was thinking that maybe the gods have abandoned us because they could not take anymore and maybe it has happened a long time ago and we did not even notice... now that's the hypothetical view from an atheist I have no faith no religion etc.. but I feel you may have a word or two on that one :-) last many thanks for a great directional comment :-) Harvey21/12/2016 #39 Harvey LloydI have watched this discussion from afar and seen the winding road of comments circle the true depth of your post, none to easy to comment directly. With respect and an open mind i would suggest that the true topic you discuss is that God has abandoned us as we look at the history of Man. If this is an inaccurate assessment of the post forgive the following comments.
Most religions, (I hate that word, but lack a better descriptor that groups the logical, of all beliefs.) offer man free will. Man is offered the design criteria pen of existence, if you will. From your post i sense you and i share that the design pen has been used more for those of power than for the masses.
If i were to convince 80% of the population that the tooth fairy was real through writings and teachings, would the evil of the world be caused by the tooth fairy?
I sell nothing here nor ask that you consider some form of faith. But would state to blame a god for what man has done ignores the very existence of success we seek in our lives. In essence we lack free will.
Many more will die in the fight of mankind. Some for their beliefs others because of their greed and still others because they rival another. But these will happen just like they have in the past, because man is exercising free will, while good men/women watch.
The God debate is a distraction while free will of individuals bent on various egregious activities to rule the world move forward. One need not believe in anything, but to exist we have to believe in each other. The God debate pits us against each other just like republican/democrat, majority/minority and many other polarizing divide and conquer strategies.
You exist, they exist and I exist. We must learn to do it together and identify those who stretch their, very human, free will to enslave us all. Power comes from exterminating others free will.21/12/2016 #37 CityVP 🐝 Manjit#36 The one thing that does connect traffic accidents with global murder is ignorance. Movies like "Blood Diamond" attempt to show us the price we pay for a material existence. In traffic accidents, it is the very material that kills us, in genocide it is for the control of that material. In Nazi Germany they called it "lebensraum" or living space for the master race. Notice how this holocaust account http://www.holocaust-trc.org/the-holocaust-education-program-resource-guide/lebensraum/ focuses on the relationship between possession and identity.
Economist Amartya Sen takes an optimistic view to solve identity in "Identity and Violence", it echoes a call to look at our similarities rather than our differences, rather than appreciate difference as diversity. It echoes the sentiment of why we could as a human race get along, whereas the "Why can't we get along?" in the comedy Mars Attack is perhaps going to be truth until there is an evolutionary renaissance of humanity https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MPMmC0UAnj0
Our evolution as human beings has not come to a climactic end for we are still emerging from the dark ages, but how future generations evolve is definitely a part of our collective legacy - because it is in individual transformation - perhaps which may well be genetically coded in our DNA that evolution becomes genetic rather than merely memetic. It is similiar to when civilizations first appeared - similiar evolution occurring at the same time https://www.forbiddenhistory.info/?q=node/67 - though this particular link theorizes that there was one advanced global culture that was decimated by some powerful agent like climate change - rather than the way humans evolve is already encoded in those parts of our DNA that today seem to be doing nothing - inactive DNA.21/12/2016 #31 CityVP 🐝 Manjit#28 Pascal, as much as I now go deeper and learn about Post Rock and what that is courtesy of sites like Wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post-rock View more#28 Pascal, as much as I now go deeper and learn about Post Rock and what that is courtesy of sites like Wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post-rock, I can also ask questions that have been asked for nearly 70 years.
Here I find the term "Never Again" - a mantra set by the United Nations in 1948 - Here is a piece about that http://ir.lawnet.fordham.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1667&context=ilj and then when I drill down to particular genocides such as Rwanda e.g. https://www.globalpolicy.org/component/content/article/201/39226.html I get into the weeds of assaults on humanity - and then with Rwanda I go deeper still to those who are considered by their nation to be heroic e.g. https://yvesengler.com/2015/12/28/the-fairy-tale-about-a-brave-canadian-general-in-rwanda/ and I come to an existential WTF moment.
It is cool to hope, nice to be positive, wonderful to inspire and marvelous to motivate - but the best thing I like opening up things is to peer into new insights. For me "Post Rock" is a new insight - but here is the rub - until we have an education system and a polity for depth, for wonder, for learning, for truth and for the humility of insight - we are the few who have hopes for the many. Even so our steps in whatever direction make us a little more wiser, a little more awed and a little more informed than is the general cause. This is the best we can do until others also choose for themselves this energy for enlightenment.
I am not a seeker of agreements or disagreements, I am not vessel of persuasion or dialogue, what I welcome most is people like you who open up new vista's, new questions and new ways of looking at our world - and then I explore and I welcome that. Close20/12/2016 #29 Aleta CurryI just can't be that hopeless, especially not at this time of year. I always hear the words of the beautiful 'I heard the bells on Christmas Day'. This line gets me every time: 'And in despair I bowed my head, "there is no peace on earth" I said; for Hate is strong and mocks the song of "Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men"'.
Our atrocities may be legion; our inhumanity great, but then so is our love. It's easy to say 'look what a mess the world's in. Look how humans behave. It's hopeless'. Yet every single day, thousands...hundreds of thousands?...millions?...of people perform small acts of kindness and love for fellow beings out of a Goodness that springs from we know not where and without expecting *anything *at * all in return.
Sure, we could each make a list of history's monsters which, if combined, would make a helluva long list. But our list of history's angels, (if we only had the knowledge to create it) would be even longer. I'm not just talking about the list of documented Good Guys, I'm talking about another list, the true list, the A-Z of Humanity. It starts with some unknown bloke named...I don't know...maybe 'Aaron', ends with another unknown fellow perhaps named Zachariah, and includes YOU.20/12/2016 #28 Pascal Derrien#25 the genre is defined as Post Rock, they are almost neighbours , they are not really well known even in Ireland past music nerds like me, interesting discussion point you are brining but I don't know about he comparison with road accident, I am actually a crash survivor myself in theory I should not be here writing this I kind of think that we cannot control the butterfly effect or destiny but conflicts can be avoided, shorten or simply stopped at least that's what I would like to think @CityVP 🐝 Manjit :-)20/12/2016 #25 CityVP 🐝 ManjitFirst of all thanks Pascal, I would never heard of "God is an Astronaut" never mind considered listening to ambient music, but having a listen to Age of the Fifth Sun https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJPTcLbGS_I View moreFirst of all thanks Pascal, I would never heard of "God is an Astronaut" never mind considered listening to ambient music, but having a listen to Age of the Fifth Sun https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJPTcLbGS_I those Kinsella twins are putting together some good beats and they have some cool artwork to go along with it as can be seen on their website .
As for the murder of people whether one calls it genocide and holocaust, the reality of that speaks for itself and it is gruesome. Just as gruesome is the comparative number of deaths that occur on roads. Take this article from Progressive Economy where Edward Gresser claims that Traffic accidents kill 1.24 million people a year worldwide; wars and murders, 0.44 million. http://www.progressive-economy.org/trade_facts/traffic-accidents-kill-1-24-million-people-a-year-worldwide-wars-and-murders-0-44-million/
We have preventable tragedies often within 10 miles of where we are or live and we can't stop that - how does one address the global conflict when the local collision is arms length - that we weep for the people far away but spare less time for the people closer to home - a home magnifying across the world in similiar tragic circumstances.
We don't react to road accidents because we protect the injured and killed for their privacy otherwise we would see as gruesome pictures on our roads as one finds in the murderous actions in our world. When we are confronted with mass numbers we become numb to the size of the loss - but we echo sentiments of empathy and compassion, as if we are washing away the horror, while the extent of local loss passes us by because the sheer extent of it would send us into psychological disorder if we were to on-board such pain and loss that happens all around us daily.
Pick up a local newspaper and needless death is there http://www.mississauga.com/news-story/7004138-funeral-friday-for-teen-killed-crossing-mississauga-street/ how can we heal war when we can't heal our own roads? Close
- 10/12/2016Guns N' Roses - Civil War with Lyrics Enjoy the song ! Lyrics: What we've got here is failure to communicate. Some men you just can't...