- 19/02/2017Quick Tip For Overcoming Fear Of FailureQuick Tip For Overcoming Fear Of Failurewww.podbean.com https://www.aurorasa-coaching.com...
- 10/02/2017New Podcast Episode: How a small word can change your worldThe Power of the word Anywaywww.podbean.com https://www.aurorasa-coaching.com Special offer of the month: Brain Entrainment Contact me for custom sessions for personal or commercial...
- 08/02/2017Do you know the power of appreciation? 85% of people are unhappy with their career. We all have goals and we are always trying to keep up with the Jones’. Goals are great to have but don’t let life pass you by without enjoying the journey you are on.
Count your blessings not your problems.
Comments08/02/2017 #2 David B. GrinbergExcellent message, Brian, I couldn't agree more. Three saying come to mind:
1) As Dale Carnegie instructed, "Give honest and sincere appreciation. One of the most neglected virtues of our daily existence is appreciation. Be hearty is your approbation and lavish in your praise."
2) To paraphrase USA Founding Father Benjamin Franklin: I shall speak ill of no person and all the good I know of everyone.
3) If life was a race it would be a marathon, not a sprint.
- 02/02/2017Hyggelig ('hug-ly')
3 Beautiful MinutesTV 2 | All That We Share We live in a time where we quickly put people in boxes. Maybe we have more in common than what we think? Introducing All That We Share. The English...
- Producer01/02/2017My Don’t Quit Coffee Cup“Don't Quit” is two verses of a poem on my favorite coffee mug. Do you have some favorite mementos? Something, whether expensive or not, that reminds you of something significant in your past? I was just making another mug of...
Comments01/02/2017 #5 David B. GrinbergThanks so much for this inspiring and motivational buzz, Lance. I also like these sayings:
1) Quitters never win and winners never quit.
2) Those who never fall never climb.
3) It's always darkest before the dawn.
4) You're closer than you think.
Actually, I'm reminded of your Gold Rush blog post with the image of the miners. That's because some miners who worked for a long time ended up quitting when they were so close to striking the gold vein. If they only would have persisted a little bit longer, they could have hit the jackpot.
Nice buzz, mate!01/02/2017 #4 CityVP 🐝 ManjitThe alternative is to be sent to Robben Island. One way or another, the world finds a way of making us.
Last year @Graham🐝 Edwards provided a profound view of broken china and a different way at looking at brokenness http://makezine.com/2015/08/17/kintsugi-japanese-art-recognizing-beauty-broken-things/ This introduction to "kintsugi" altered my perspective.
The long shot is even if that mug is highly valued, if it required kintsugi, the original meaning of it is not lost, but the new lines it supports makes the idea of challenge beautiful. Beauty in the brokeness rather than the struggle not to break, if we have this art.01/02/2017 #2 Max🐝 J. CarterThis was great @Lance 🐝 Scoular. When I am working with people one on one or in groups I often tell them to rest but never quit and I don't remember where it came from for me however it is something always in the back of my mind for several years.
I may start giving them this poem which is a great tool to have and thank you for sharing it with us in its entirety.
- Producer29/01/2017Surrendering to CourageWe belongThis was written a number of weeks ago, and maybe its the time to be published. Right now 'courage' is needed more than before in my lifetime and maybe yours. I have a vested interest in this world, and so do you. We live here. We breathe...
Comments04/02/2017 #46 🐝 Fatima Williams" You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face " #quoteunknown
But this is what comes to my mind when I read this buzz. I see a women challenging fear and who has gained confidence, courage and a beautiful soul every step moving forward. #bebeesforver :)04/02/2017 #45 Sushmita Thakare Jain#44 Ohh my my...i'm missing out on wonderful posts out here...
Well all face the Courage in some form or the other each day
I connect with you emotinally, its difficult to find your Courage and surrender to it...but thats required...
Thank you for tagging me in...📝01/02/2017 #38 Brian McKenzieThere is no money in Peace - if there was; that would be breaking out everywhere. Fear and Low Info are the payday for Money and Power - and they have been that way for Millennia. It will not change in our life time. The current color revolutions in play by Soros & Clinton prove that. It's a recipe as old as Marx - too bad too few care to read it. Too bad so many still crave and love the Pavlovian Kibble.01/02/2017 #37 Lisa 🐝 GallagherMy grandfather served in WWI- just not to date myself too much, I had a much older grandfather. My other grandfather served during WWII and my dad during the Korean War. They all signed up voluntarily, so I came from a family of strong men, sadly they all left too soon. It was my mother who raised 5 children on a mealy wage that inspired me to dream, anything is possible and to never give up. Times have been tough lately. I have been more silent because my brain is trying to heal. But, in numbers there is strength and I/WE shall prevail! PS: Marches coming up, speaking of strength in numbers: https://www.facebook.com/groups/progressivearmy/events/ Thanks @Donna-Luisa Eversley01/02/2017 #35 Pamela 🐝 WilliamsBeing the daughter & sister of service men who faced 'the enemy' in Korea, Vietnam, and the Gulf, the former wife of a police officer and a single mother for my daughter's entire life, I can say this; courage is love in it's purest form. We can try to separate them, but they are one and the same. I did not see myself as courageous for being a single mother because I love my daughter so much there is nothing I won't do, nothing I won't sacrifice for her well-being and happiness.
When my brother left this earth I was his executor and supervised all the funeral arrangements. A cousin came up to me at the services and whispered: "You're the strongest person I've ever met". I wasn't strong., I wanted to scream at everything and everybody, BUT, my brother had suffered mentally and emotionally his entire life and because of this many looked down on him. I was going to make damn sure that his passing was seen as a great loss to us, because it was. Courage is love. Love will give you the strength of 10.30/01/2017 #31 Aleta CurryThank you for this reminder, @Donna-Luisa Eversley. I believe in courage; I've seen it in action. I won't piggy-back on your post, so I'll save the story for another day, but I know what's in us and I believe humans summon up the best when their backs are to the wall.30/01/2017 #30 Laura MikolaitisA timely and relevant buzz @Donna-Luisa Eversley. One of my favorite quotes about courage: "“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow.” ~ Mary Anne Radmacher. I love this quote because courage does come in all shapes and sizes, and it resides within us even when we don't realize that it is there. We are presented with circumstances and challenges every step of the way so I believe that courage definitely plays a part in helping us along the way. Lately, for me, it has been that little voice at the end of the day. Thanks for a lovely piece of writing and reflection, Donna.
- It´s not necessary to understand the affirmations. Your brain will.Affirmations for Self Esteem - Subliminal Brain Entrainment Sample. Best with headphones. Full sessions at http://aurorasa-coaching.com Disclaimer/Warning:...
- Sample EQ Brain Entrainment Sample from the new EQ Brain Entrainment Album with monaural beats and isochronic tones. Powerful yet effortless. Get your full album with over 4 hours of...
- 30/01/2017New Podcast EpisodeHow to make more money - realistic versionwww.podbean.com There is a simple way to making more money. It´s not a short-cut. The link from the announcement: EQ Brain Entrainment I will upload the samples promised in the podcast episode right...
- Producer29/01/2017Open Minds Vs. Closed Minds- which is better?The questions that occupy my day are considering open vs. closed situations. Examples include: Do you prefer open-minded or closed-minded people? Do you opt for open systems, closed systems or both? Example: Windows vs. Apple Do you...
Comments15/02/2017 #105 Ali Anani#104 My dear friend and author @Edward Lewellen- first- it is my genuine pleasure to read your comments again. I hope your health is great as much as your brainy ideas are. Your example of open offices reflects on a real life experience and I share your point of view entirely. Yes, sometimes when we have only two choices we rush into selecting one without considering consequences, as your story example pointed out. I wrote in a later buzz that having choices may generate new choices. You again revealed a great example. You mentioned introverts started building walls of books.
You enrich my my mind my friend.15/02/2017 #104 Edward LewellenMy dear friend, @AliAnani, your ongoing use of nature to teach inspires awe of creation! You correctly write that we quickly jump to this binary decision, open or closed. I found myself doing exactly that! As in most things, to make a generalization of "all" or "none" seems to find exceptions to the rule. I recently became aware of a company that went to an open-space environment for most of their people. The executives thought, as you pointed out, that it would increase interaction, response time, camaraderie, etc. The executive I was speaking with asked me, "Do you know what happened?" I said, "let me get my crystal ball out and tell you. The people who are Extroverts loved it. They ended up engaging with each other more than before and wasting more time than before. The people who are Introverts started building walls for themselves with books, file hangers, pretty much anything they could find." His jaw dropped and he said I have pinpoint accuracy of the reactions from the employees. Unfortunately, executives have what they think is a great idea and then they generalize it into "one size fits all". People are too variable to make something good for all the people all the time.31/01/2017 #97 Sara Jacobovici#95 Thank you to @Ali Anani for bringing my attention to your comment @Donna-Luisa Eversley. I appreciate you saying that being open to one perspective does not close you to the existence of another. I like the way Dr. Ali worded it by saying that "open and close coexist." Maybe making a choice is often difficult when someone can not imagine being able to hold both that which has been chosen and that which was not.31/01/2017 #96 Ali Anani#95 You never amaze me with your sharpness @Donna-Luisa Eversley. I enjoyed your comment immensely. Your writing "I will relate open and closed to choices and how we share our point of view. If I am open to sharing good thoughts and kindness, I can't be closed off from the fact that bad, negative, and hate exist. For one to be highlighted the other must be present". So, open and close coexist. You are a pioneer in your thinking and your observation that hugging was accompanied with hate in some comments is the proof.
Because of @Sara Jacobovici is writing a buzz on similar issues I invite her to read your comment Donna. I have no doubt dear Sara shall enjoy reading it.31/01/2017 #95 Donna-Luisa EversleyWell I guess because I snore I will prefer open, Hahaha.. Quite an interesting topic. I will relate open and closed to choices and how we share our point of view. If I am open to sharing good thoughts and kindness, I can't be closed off from the fact that bad, negative, and hate exist. For one to be highlighted the other must be present. I shared a post on hugs and was surprised that it could elicit hate in some comments. Yet, there I was looking at the thoughts of another. I'm okay with choices once it does not become abusive or obscene. Thus by all means keep your mouth closed when sleeping, but I'll keep snoring with mine open and give you some earplugs 😊
Much food for thought @Ali Anani30/01/2017 #88 Ali AnaniLove your mention of the tipping point @Donald Grandy. This gives the image that open/close are not on the opposite ends of a straight line; rather on a curve. This possibility opens my mind to many new thoughts and possibilities. I therefore greatly appreciate your illumination and sharing of the buzz. Thank you.
- 26/01/2017Symptoms of Depressiongoo.gl It is now 20 years ago that Steve jumped from the rooftop of the office building in Frankfurt, Germany. My colleague AND friend, Steve (Dr. Steve...
- 25/01/2017Why people have grey text on blogs is beyond me, but the content is good.The Scary Power of Negative Wordsgoop.com Words are extremely powerful tools that we can use to uplift our personal energy and improve our lives, though we’re often not conscious of the words we speak, read, and expose ourselves...
- 16/01/2017How Mindfulness Cured My Headachescorygalbraith.com For weeks, I experienced strange headaches. Of course, when this happens, most people fear the worst possible scenario. Brain tumor? I thought it may be a sinus problem so I took sinus pills. They...
Comments16/01/2017 #7 Phil FriedmanGreat post, Cory. My experience is that almost always tension and it's outward physical symptoms are a trigger for headaches. And I can also see from my experience how Mindfulness can work to alleviate such headaches. Now if I could, in my life, eliminate the many pains in my ass, I'd be in truly good shape. :-). Cheers!
- Producer15/01/2017Finding the Needle of the CompassKnow your direction and where to go is a basic concept of strategy. If you don't know where to go then you may end up anywhere. We need a compass to show us the direction. In our highly unstable and volatile world we may have a compass to show us...
Comments17/01/2017 #54 Ali Anani#51 You are truly a wonderful strategist @Devesh Bhatt as evidenced by your reference to double accounting and by giving a real example to explain what you mean "..One is marketing dept and one is planning dept...Don't isolate...Structure and simplify functioning 8 hrs in office is an extremely long time". Great thinking...17/01/2017 #52 Ali Anani#49 I thank you dear @Jeet Sarkar for your mind-challenging questions. As I said before in a response to a comment here, sometimes having many choices may be confusing to the mind. The birds utilize fixed facts to take fixed directions such as the position of the sun and the magnetism of the earth and this way they may use simple rules in this complex world. We need sometimes to have fixed rules to follow to limit down our options and find a simple direction to follow.
We may also recall that the magnetized beaks, for example, are not permanent magnets; in fact hey are only magnetized under certain conditions so that the molecules within may be magnetized under certain conditions. How about a similar thinking? We are not magnetized, but creative enough to learn from nature.17/01/2017 #51 Devesh BhattFollowed by sounds and then smell.
I say smell as the third because if you observe the 24 HR cycle, rarely do both nostrils operate simultaneously in a lifestyle where we are usually seated in AC environment.
But eyes and ears usually operate together.
If we equate with the human body, why do we assume sight as one input, why not assume two parralelly functioning eyes...I compare it with operational and accounting double entry...In strategy we look at accounts but often are lazy to view operational entries simultaneously... The linkages behind the numbers.
Similarly two ears not exclusive in inputs but outputs...Factual and hearsay...Outputs being same..Outlook
2 nostrils, for risk and opportunity simultaneously...One is marketing dept and one is planning dept...Don't isolate...Structure and simplify functioning 8 hrs in office is an extremely long time..These things can be done in under 20 mins with practice.
And yes, practice to sharpen the senses.17/01/2017 #50 Devesh BhattTalking about paradoxes
Evaluating inputs of our senses is done by the brain. This evaluation is not within the realm of our conscious rationality, but serves as an input.
Our body evolves as per experience, senses improve with higher variations in the environment, and rationality improves with sensory inputs and practicing rationality.
So the best method of sharpening senses is through varied experience, which can be natural or experimental as prescribed by rationality.
The very discussion of senses tilts our evaluation towards the rational side and we are conditioned to assume rationality and sensory inputs as exclusive and a matter of choice and not complimentary.
Hence the first step as reflected in your posts ..Is rational acceptance of our senses, The second step hence must be experience of the senses, effective modules for sharpening our senses...The easiest being sight17/01/2017 #49 Jeet SarkarEvolution is the key by virtue of which fins of a fish are able to modified into the wings of a bird, this evolution makes the aves group very special. They have some outstanding abilities. The comparison and the metaphors you used are as usual beauty of your post. But I wonder if the human eyes and nose , two critical sense organs, are magnetized then what will happen about viewing and sensing the the decisions and strategy? How human beings will reciprocate it?because magnet can only work with the limited number of metals. An intriguing post by the way sir @Ali Anani I must say! enjoy reading . Thank you very much for sharing it sir .16/01/2017 #48 Ali Anani#46 This is the irony @Alan Culler- we are still not sure of how birds do it. How birds sense their direction? As I mentioned in the buzz- nearly all the methods you summarized in your thoughtful talk. I myself believe like molecules send messages in our bodies, there are also molecules in birds that make them aware of direction. How? I am still trying to understand. The journey is a long one my friend.16/01/2017 #46 Alan CullerIn the US a few months ago we were treated to the annual migration of the Canada Geese - a great 'V' of birds in the sky flying South. It is tempting to thing that they all follow a leader at the point of the 'V'. On further observation, one sees that the point position is rotational -the leader drops back to the position on one of the wings of the 'V."
The ornithological hypothesis is that the point position encounters greater wind resistance and is therefore very tiring -therefore the rotation. But how do the geese all know the direction?
Is it visual based upon landmarks?
Is it sound based -communicated by that incessant honkink as they fly overhead -or when the gaggle mills about chaotically on the ground?
Or does the magnetism of the poles and lines of longitude and latitude speak to them all?
Or is it memory -individual and species memory that directs them?
Or all of these things?
And how would we as humans learn from this -seeing -feeling- connecting- talking -joining and moving together.
Thank you, Ali -I always enjoy the mental adventures you lead.
Alan16/01/2017 #45 Alan CullerAs usual, Ali Anani a beautiful post tapestry with so many threads:
Personal purpose, inner direction and vision direction
Strategy -understanding direction and over-coming the "conflicts and frictions" that will get in the way of execution.
The how of purpose or vision detection -Magnetic perceptions -. or sense driven -sight and sound -more concrete -but just as hard to understand.
And the collective behavior of the flock -all moving in the same direction.
I'm thinking a lot about that -Thank you.
Alan16/01/2017 #40 Ali Anani#39 Dear @Mohammed Sultan- thanks again for engaging my mind. When scouts of bees find a good resource they waggle dance to let other bees find out the new location and the direction how to get there. The bees need to know not only where to go, but also the direction how to get there.
As for birds that migrate to the same place annually they know the destination well ahead of time. They could travel more than 1000 km to get there. They need now more the direction how to get there because they know the destination.
So, I agree with you and your son if birds were to migrate to different places they need first to find the destination. This what bees do as they scout different flours . They send scout bees to find a new source. The destination in this case comes first.16/01/2017 #39 Mohammed SultanBirds immigration or businesses journey is not set for specific direction,so both need focus to dwell in promising areas that worth the energy and attention given to their long journey.Setting a proper direction without focusing on what you do better than others will keep you floundering or at best just a runner.The journey often comprises a set of milestones with objectives,and with ever stopping a new direction may need to be set.Just as people may become lost,adrift,and aimless once they have reached a goal.My son, a diplomat, has once told me that- we are like the immigrating birds, every year in a different duty station, so many of us suffer from what we can call it an "arrival syndrome" or "immigration syndrome".It's not the direction itself that's important.it's the challenge to find what you thrive for.16/01/2017 #38 Ali Anani#34 I thank you heartedly dear @CityVP 🐝 Manjit for writing a lovely comment. Till now scientists are not sure how birds do it. We know birds and animals do it, but how is still a challenging question in most cases.
You bring two hugely relevant points. Yes, Serendipity has played a major role in our lives and has led to great discoveries. So many chemical and other discoveries weren't planned for; through serendipity they emerged. X-ray is one example.
As for the rational thinking of man- yes, and this is an asset the man forgets to use and I feel sometimes it is better than have it and neglect it is worse than not having it at all. As I mentioned in my response to @Franci🐝Eugenia Hoffman how much rational thinking goes in the stock markets when greed becomes a dominant force and all lessons and data are burnt by greed.
Inner compass and inner motivation- and now inner compass and outer compass- a great point to expand on my friend.16/01/2017 #37 Ali Anani#33- I am very glad you referred to the instinct as Donald Grandy did as well. Your lovely comment and definition of intuition supports the idea this issue merits a buzz on its own. I thank you @Kevin Baker View more#33- I am very glad you referred to the instinct as Donald Grandy did as well. Your lovely comment and definition of intuition supports the idea this issue merits a buzz on its own. I thank you @Kevin Baker for visiting and commenting. Close
- 15/01/2017What happens when you blow soap bubbles in freezing temperatures. Captivating.....Soap bubbles @ -15 degrees Celsius Soap bubbles freezing over at roughly -15C. Video inspired by this article:...
Comments15/01/2017 #1 Liesbeth Leysen, MSc. Brand Ambassador beBee, Inc.beautiful!
- Producer15/01/2017The Dark Side of MindfulnessMindfulness is extremely useful in everyday life. Mindfulness and meditation can change your brain and help remove the "scars of life". It´s a powerful tool to help with depression and anxiety and can increase your level of happiness - and therefore...
Comments15/01/2017 #1 Mohammed A. JawadToo many things, busy life and work schedules, and fast paced worldliness has left human being 'a puppet in the age of machination and digital world'. Presumably, a little mindfulness to examine self and little mindfulness to remember the Almighty Lord is essential in one's life.:)
- Producer09/01/2017I Challenge You...The song "You raise me up" never fails to bring tears to my eyes. It does not make me sad. If anything, I am filled with a passionate feeling of courage and a desire to excel. There are many songs which will inspire and some can motivate action -...
Comments12/01/2017 #26 Donna-Luisa Eversley#12 @Preston Vander Ven , yes I love this song. I agree with you , it is beautiful. If we can all be challenged to raise up another, for no other reason but because it is a heart's desire to make someone happy. Of course to respond to you I am listening. Thank you...stay blessed :-)12/01/2017 #22 Donna-Luisa Eversley#17 @Devesh Bhatt I like your directness.. hahaha. Who knows what the future holds, in the meantime can I point you in the direction of trying a 'live buzz'... and if you have done one please send me the link. I do hope to do many more live buzzes than I did in 2016. Lets spread some happy and culture!10/01/2017 #19 Ali AnaniI enjoy your mind and the juicy buzzes come out of it @Donna-Luisa Eversley. I agree with you on all fronts. I may just add sometimes times constraints limit my ability to "discover" new bees from their writing. I made a promise for myself that for every four comments I write on buzzes by affiliate bees I shall write a minimum of one comment for a new bee. This way I have the potential of increasing my social interactions at a reasonable rate without harming my "old roots".09/01/2017 #13 debasish majumderabsolutely stunning post @Donna-Luisa Eversley! William Shakespesre or O'Henry or Robert frost, none i know personally, neither by virtual media, yet, i resonate with them, feel them without their presence in my life. i strongly align with them! however, in your case too, i don't know you physically, neither virtually. but, i can feel you by your writings and unhesitatingly i share your post without bothering who else is reading and engagement it is deriving. equally, this post too i share without any reservation of my own as the post itself contain the gravity of sharing. however, enjoyed read. thank you very much for sharing the post madam.09/01/2017 #11 Franci🐝Eugenia HoffmanThank you Donna-Luisa. I'm up to the challenge and will do my best! 😀 I miss a few thus the reason why I don't mind being tagged! With the influx of newbees, it's important that we make them feel welcome. I try to read posts from our new bees, as well as bringing older posts back in the spotlight.
- 09/01/2017Vera Rubin Quotewww.azquotes.com In a spiral galaxy, the ratio of dark-to-light matter is about a factor of ten. That's probably a good number for the ratio of our ignorance-to-knowledge. We're out of kindergarten, but only in about third...
- 08/01/2017Newsletter is out01-08-2017 - Predictions & Painarchive.aweber.com
- Producer03/06/2016Expectations Have Stories to TellThe story began when my friend got "A" grades in all his intermediate exams. On completing his final exams he visited me and had this scenario of "chain surprises". I did better in my final exams than before. You know, I am entitled not only to...
Comments08/01/2017 #51 Harvey Lloyd#48 I wanted to address this separately. "...expectations moved from a process of cause and effect predictability to a belief system"
This is a profound statement. We have lost our way in the fact that our value system is slowly being replaced by a system of expectations both met and unmet.
All goals that start out successfully are developed within a value set that is empowering a win-win outcome. If expectations cause us to lose this "meaning" and slowly replaces the values along the way.......then we are now operating within a storm of changing viewpoints across the team.
This is a point to ponder.08/01/2017 #49 Harvey Lloyd#48 I belive yiou summed up what the discussion is. But i was signaling that the goal should be our focus.. Certainly expectations are a part of the process, but we should "imagine" that between the start and goal success that expectations will be met and redirect the process.
We have all heard the term, "Well i thought.....". Usually this surrounds a team members understanding and expectation. Its when they cant get focused on the goal that we begin to experience the defense. So unmet expectations begin to manifest.08/01/2017 #48 Sara JacoboviciGentlemen, @Ali Anani and @Harvey Lloyd, I don't know when or how it happened but expectations moved from a process of cause and effect predictability to a belief system. One word that I haven't seen mentioned (unless I missed it) is meaning; what meaning we attach to an expectation, its "belief" and will influence how we then manifest its outcome. The fact that emotions are so strongly attached reflect how individual each attachment is to that particular expectation. It would be interesting to look at patterns created by expectations. In relation to the quote that Dr. Ali brought to my attention, "we have control over our expectations, but when they are unmet then it's someone else's fault". My gut reaction is that we set ourselves up to think we're in control of the expectation and then when it is not met, we can not blame ourselves and so transfer the responsibility somewhere else. The paradox may be in the individual assuming he is in control of determining something which in reality is not in hs control. As always, gentlemen, thank you for the opportunity to engage in such a dynamic discussion.08/01/2017 #47 Ali Anani#46 Great thoughts again @Harvey Lloyd. I enjoyed reading your alert "A fail in expectations is merely a challenge within the journey. But when expectations are the goal, the challenge is now life or death".Very true and we turn expectations into a trap because we make them the goal instead of a challenge in our journey. When we treat them as challenges we learn and evolve, but when we turn expectations into goals we poison the journey and ourselves.
"Unmet emotional needs will always manifest themselves in other ways"- this is a powerful quote. I wouldn't argue about its legitimacy for a second.08/01/2017 #46 Harvey Lloyd#45 "Unmet emotional needs will always manifest themselves in other ways" Roger Dawson. Your comment and this post describe this concept. This quote was discussing that within the paradigm of win-win we avoid this outcome. The opposite being when we practice win-lose we can expect the looser later on to take advantage of the same game play, with you. My world view is we have developed a cycle of win-lose. Leadership is establishing expectations based on poor performance of the culture, while culture is blaming the leadership for their unmet expectations. How do you break this cycle? How do you eat an elephant, one bite at the time.
One of our start-ups was a counseling business that we spawned through our education group. The gentlemen we choose to start up with was actaully very amazing. He made a very tangible statement. "I only have too change one person within the family unit and the rest will follow." My initial response to this was poppycock. However i watched this practitioner train staff and support families with this methodology and change did happen. Some incrementally and some drastically. Lead from where you are. You can engage in change today in your office and start a trend in your very local department.
Expectations blind us to reality. Goals that we shoot for are a better way to approach success. Goals allow us to set expectations and navigate towards the goal. A fail in expectations is merely a challenge within the journey. But when expectations are the goal, the challenge is now life or death.
If i could metaphorically hang the hat of entitlement on a hook, i would label it expectations. Because i was top of class, got an A or many people told me how great i am, my expectation is set, or is it? The goal should set the expectation for the short term, the goal will change the expectation as we meet the challenges of the journey.08/01/2017 #45 Ali Anani#44 I shall edit and change in accordance with your suggestion @Harvey Lloyd "I believe your diagram may need to exchange the word sadness for expectations as the leading cause of sadness"".
Your comment brings so many ideas to my mind. The paradox of what you wrote "we have control over our expectations, but when they are unmet then its someone else's fault". I love this thought even if it reflects sand situations. I tag @Sara Jacobovici for this extremely important observation. I think you shall love it, too.
I also greatly appreciate your reference to the role of media. May be an off-shoot idea is soccer matches. You read the expectations of results and that the strong team is expected to beat the opponent by a score of 5 to 0. The result may be the underdog beats the "inflated" strong team. Expectations have a hidden evil- they inflate the strong to look down at the opponents and only to lose. We have witnessed the same in business where a strong company ignores a weak opponent- till the expectations fall on their faces.08/01/2017 #44 Harvey LloydI believe your diagram may need to exchange the word sadness for expectations as the leading cause of sadness. Expectations or reliance on others performance has become the leading cause for depression in our country. You tap into the social media aspects of this when you say,"...viewership of posts to reach certain numbers...". One of my partners quoted from a book, cant remember the name, but the quote stuck with me. " Each morning we arise and paint a picture in our minds. We spend the rest of the day forcing our environment to fit the picture." I always follow the quote with what happens when everyone shows up with a picture?
The irony of this discussion is that we have control over our expectations, but when they are unmet then its someone else's fault. When we look at Maslow's hierarchy "Safety" is where expectations are born, can we never question this ourselves, internally?
Many folks confuse effort within expectations. If i do everything right then my expectations will be met. From my purview of age i have found hard work although cathartic and part of meeting expectations, there is no guarantee. I can work hard shoveling a hole in the ground, spend hours and meeting expectation, a backhoe can show up and in ten minutes do what it took me hours. Is my work any less or more important now? The answer is all predicated on what my expectations were in the beginning.
Media sets expectations high. Until an individual becomes self-actualizing enough to recognize that they are allowing the environment to dictate expectations and they CAN change the expectation..........buy anti-depressant pharma stocks.
Your diagram explains the issues well, @Ali Anani.08/01/2017 #43 Ali Anani#42 Like your star example, you guided me with this very thoughtful comment dear @David Navarro López. Your comment is rich in its wisdom:
"When I set them, both need to be achievable, being the short run ones much easier to be achieved. This way, by having success with the later, it encourages me to go on"
"Above all, expectations should not be intended to be a goal, but a path in our life.
To accomplish an expectation should not be the end of the path: should be the beginning of it"
Great ideas and I truly love them.08/01/2017 #42 AnonymousExpectations is a wide matter to work on, and a milestone to achieve happiness, at least in western countries. Oriental mindset tries to discard expectations, considering it a kind of pride which needs to be put away to avoid frustration or sadness as you mention.
In my personal life, I try to set two kinds of expectations: long run and short run expectations, in a way that the short run ones would lead me (but not exclusively) to the long-run ones. When I set them, both need to be achievable, being the short run ones much easier to be achieved. This way, by having success with the later, it encourages me to go on.
This "strategy of life" has given me more happiness than sadness, as when I don't get what I expected, I don't allow sadness to empower the situation, by taking two actions: one, learn what it went wrong, and try again harder, and two, to be open minded about discovering new targets to be achieved which get inevitability unrevealed after a failure.
Above all, expectations should not be intended to be a goal, but a path in our life.
To accomplish an expectation should not be the end of the path: should be the beginning of it.
As the northern star, nobody thinks about reaching it, but using it as a guide.03/06/2016 #36 Lisa 🐝 Gallagher"Seeing 'the star in the midnight of sadness" Very poetic and if we are able to see this star, we are better off for it in the long term. One must reach deep within and be open to finding the star first. I agree, focusing on something beautiful or good in the midst of sadness.03/06/2016 #35 Lisa 🐝 Gallagher#26 My son visited Istanbul in 2005 @Ali Anani and @Anees Zaidi. He found the culture extremely interesting, said the people were extremely nice and I saw the photo's, just beautiful! People sadly, make judgements about others and their countries based on what they see on the news because the news only posts negative issues. They never focus on the many positive attributes of other countries, the people etc... I would suggest to anyone who is unable to travel- watch documentaries which showcase other countries in a fair and wonderful way. There are pro's/con's to all countries.
Comments08/01/2017 #13 Aurorasa Sima#11 Glad you like them! I made 20 with music to send a positive vibe to people suffering from anxiety too.
https://www.bebee.com/producer/@aurorasa/20-powerful-affirmations-to-reduce-anxiety08/01/2017 #12 Aurorasa Sima#8 If you are lucky enough to find one with that credentials, good for you.
100 % agree with the definition of meditation. Just would like to add that by being present you actually get away from everything.
Yes, rewiring is possible, takes about 90 days but will not happen if you meet the 08/15 doctor that puts you on meds.08/01/2017 #8 Don 🐝 Kerr#6 However, if you are working with a psychotherapist with an understanding of neuroscience then the benefits of mindfulness based stress reduction practice and it's ability to assist on the neuroelasticity front, i.e., it is never too late to rewire, progress can be made and sustained. I don't ever (now) underestimate the genuine benefit of mindful meditation. While it is far from 'affirming' since it demands that you face adversity and explore it with curiosity and openness leading to acceptance and love, it is effective for many. "The point of meditation isn't to be peaceful, to be better than where you are now, or to get away from everything. It's to be present. Present with whatever is." Waylon Lewis08/01/2017 #7 Franci🐝Eugenia Hoffman#6 I would trust in neuroscience since it is a scientific study of the nervous system, rather than psychotherapy, which could be made up of those in the field but with varying degrees.
Interesting discussion, Aurorasa, especially relating to traumatic experiences.08/01/2017 #6 Aurorasa Sima#4 I learned three years ago that EI is not always enough when I discovered that 8 years of traumatic experience had changed my brain.
Similar to anxiety and depression, traumatic experience changes our brains in a way that regions of the brain that do not serve us when it comes to achieving goals and happiness become part of our default mode network (the DMN turns on when we "turn off" = relax).
Affirmations can never be more than a short positive sprinkle for a depressed person, for as long as they did not retrain their brain - for which everyone is in needed to check out my offering.
I don´t trust in psychotherapy. I trust in neuroscience.07/01/2017 #1 Franci🐝Eugenia HoffmanThank you for sharing, Aurorasa! This is an inspiring selection of positive affirmations. Depression is difficult to detect as it can tuck itself away deep in the mind. There are some obvious signs but not always. It's transparency is frequently elusive and treatment is a guessing game. Depression=the hidden disease.
- I like this.Fred Luskin, PhD: What Is Forgiveness? This video series is a dialogue between Dr. Fred Luskin, who holds a PhD in Counseling and Health Psychology from Stanford University where he served as...
Comments07/01/2017 #1 Liesbeth Leysen, MSc. Brand Ambassador beBee, Inc.forgivenes is KEY
- Producer20 Powerful Affirmations To Reduce AnxietyVideo version with soothing music or if you want to download the affirmations that resonate the most with you, grab them on slideshare. Downloadable Powerpoint Version: HERE -- Aurorasa SimaEmpowermentalist/Coach/Emotional Intelligence Trainer...