- Producer23/06/2017I Had a Dream...“Have you any dreams you’d like to sell?” Stevie, Nicks, Fleetwood MacThey say we dream four to six times per night — which is more than I want, believe me. I had one last night where a town was so corrupt, nobody cared anymore. Citizens got crazy...
- Producer23/06/2017A Fearsome Friday Funday Face!We've all heard of Grumpy Cat, right? Well, the picture above adorned a friend's (Kathleen Carper) recent post, and I just had to use it. Never saw a bug that looked so obviously grumpy. (Turns out it's a bee; who knew?)And just so we won't see that...
- Producer20/06/2017Sean Spicer’s Replacement AnnouncedJules is known for his uncanny ability to communicate without words.Washington is abuzz with the announcement White House press secretary Sean Spicer will be stepping aside and mime “Jules” will be replacing him.“Sean did a great job,” White House...
- 20/06/2017Who let them in anyway? Don't they card at this place??? @Susan 🐝 Rooks
- 15/06/2017A follow-up to one of @Paul "Pablo" Croubalian 's shares . . .
- 15/06/2017Apparently, artificial intelligence has a hard time distinguishing between fried chicken and labradoodles. :)
Comments12/06/2017 #11 Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee#10 I once had what I thought was a friend in New Hampshire. We went to visit for a few days. I went outside with her one dark night to help her get her clothes off the line. She thought she saw a bear outlined in the dark. We ran back to the house.
To my surprise, she took the time to turn and push me backwards in an effort to make me a feast for the bear to effect her escape.
We never visited again.11/06/2017 #5 David 🐝 Martín AlonsoNo hay testigos, pero hace justo un año corría yo despavorido colina abajo después de intentar fotografiar una hacienda abandonada rodeada de girasoles con una puesta de sol (Foto perfecta que no conseguí, obviamente), toda una colmena, enjambre de abejas me persiguió, me cazó, pero no me llegaron a picar. ¿Sería una premonición?.
El susto fue mortal, aunque sigo vivo
- 10/06/2017LOLThe Mermaid - Police Station Scene w/English subs Sorry for the motion blur, didn't realize it was there until the video went up and I'm not rendering this...
Comments22/06/2017 #1 Barbara HensleeI'm here, I'm here! Your soulmate is here! It took me a while to get through that dumb door. I thought it was locked, so I stood there waiting until this 5 year old kid walked up and pulled open the door for me. Oh, now I see how it works. Then, I had to go through that revolving door thingy. I must have gotten confused because I found myself back at that dumb door again. I knew better this time, and tried to pull open that door (fool me once as they say). I think that kid locked it, the little bugger.
- Producer08/06/2017Comey’s First Draft of Written Testimony Reveals Literary TalentIn a blockbuster exclusive, The Lint Screen has obtained some notes from the first draft of former FBI Director James Comey’s written testimony. It follows“It was a dark and stormy night. Dark as ink in a windowless closet, wet as a drunk...
- Producer06/06/2017I Will Help You (and President Trump) Become Better SpellersMy on again, off again search for a second career has come to an end. I firmly believe I have found an ancillary vocation that will provide me steady revenue in my golden years; or at least enough disposable income to join, guilt-free, the other...
Comments06/06/2017 #6 Greg Schwem#1 @Susan 🐝 Rooks Just so you know, the Microsoft spell checker has absolutely no idea what those words are that the Bee finalists spelled correctly. When I typed the column and included those words, they all had the squiggly red line underneath and the phrase "no suggestions" when I tried to "correct" the spelling.06/06/2017 #5 CityVP 🐝 ManjitNew York Times are making great profits, CNN is making record profits and when even the chief tag line is stolen from Ronald Reagan, the actor who became to be known as one of America's great Presidents, we get to know what the line now means "Make American Media Great Again".
Now, a spelling-bee contest only makes moolah if it is empowered by media, but I am not and most likely will never be the poster-child for proofreading - and so me earning $200 per hour as a spellchecker is as likely as me becoming President of the United States, which is never because I was not born there.
American media has never had it so good, and that includes the stand up comics and talk-show hosts. He (The Donald) has made American Media Great Again, and his like will never be voted in again - if anything there can never be too much covfefe to make American media great again, for America's media really do need this covfefe.
America can now laugh its way to global bankruptcy and more crashes while the 1% have the real last laugh, being that they own most of the media that dined on Trump's ratings while drowning out coverage of other candidates. Thankfully no one has to spell check that six letter word that ends with "ed" and aptly describes the current American experience.
To think Roger Daltery sang about not being fooled again.06/06/2017 #1 Susan 🐝 RooksHah, Hah, Hah -- love (l-o-v-e) this, @Greg Schwem! LOVE IT! Funny and on-point. And good luck with Drumpf -- I fear he's way beyond our poor powers to help in any way.
But your post is wonderful, and I so needed a good laugh this morning!
Of course, I'm not sure that spelling in and of itself is a useful tool (spellcheck performs that job very well), because those kids are learning odd words that even the best crossword puzzle lovers (cruciverbalists) will never need. But maybe it helps to stretch their minds . . . I hope so!
Oh well. Back to dreaming of a world where apostrophes don't float from plural to plural and the Oxford comma is finally awarded the honors it should have had all along.
- 04/06/2017This guy from Malawi is so witty and funny. His name is Daliso Chaponda.
Simon Cowell: "You are one of the funniest people we've had on this show. I love the fact that you are so fantastically non PC"
Alesha: "You made uncomfortable topics funny".ROFL! Golden Buzzer Comedian Makes Judges Can't Stop LAUGHING! | Semi Final 5 | BGT 2017 ► ► ► CLICK HERE to Learn How To Sing ► http://MusicTalentNow.com/Learn-To-Sing ◄ ► Daliso Chaponda Britain's Got Talent 2017 Semi Final Full Audition...
- Producer02/06/2017Washington Post Humor The Washington Post held a contest years ago in which readers composed and sent in their worst analogies. Of the many entries received, about fifty made the shortlist for the prize of the worst analogy. Below are some of the final selection of wry,...
Comments03/06/2017 #28 Ken Boddie#24 And so, Gert, it appears that .....
Each analogy's a tragedy,
And bears no similarity,
Whilst criticism of neologism,
Will wear no popularity,
Then, dearie me, just who are we,
To disagree or to agree?
It seems to me, quite obviously,
To circumvent profanity,
We can't persist and must desist,
So we'll maintain our sanity. 😩03/06/2017 #22 Ken BoddieGert, I couldn't agree more with you that these analogies are the worst, with some of them being particularly dragged out for no apparent reason ..... unless, of course, you were to suggest that they aren't the worst, in which case I wouldn't agree with you, but, in order to avoid propagating a needless and somewhat pointless argument, I'd probably suggest that we agree to disagree ..... but only if we were actually to disagree, and since we don't appear to disagree then let's just leave it at that .... unless, of course, you have anything else to add, or to substantiate that we are actually in agreement? 🤔
- 04/06/2017Darren Schoonbeart - Owner/ President at Ace of Carts in Saskatoon, Sk. responds to delivery of "Power Play" painting with the winning bid for the Flin Flon SPCA.
"Yes Sir. Looks awesome!!!"
- 01/06/2017A reminder: One semester of Spanish does not make you Julio Iglesias ;)One Semester of Spanish - Love Song Learn how to romance a girl with one semester of spanish put to a catchy song. Download this and other runawaybox mp3s for free at...
- 01/06/2017Inspired by the buzz share from @Flavio 🇯🇵 Souza 🐝
- Producer31/05/2017The "Parent-ial" Generation ExplainedI was discussing family with my buddy Fletch during a break in recording a podcast for his employer, business communications provider Avaya. “I want to be a ‘Parential,’” he said “You want to reappear ever year?” I asked,...
- Producer30/05/2017Longer, Thicker, Harder, Massive!The NASA Rover "accidentally" drew this on Mars in 2013. That's what they claim anyway. That's their story and they're sticking to it.(Warning: Not Safe For Work! This first appeared on my blog in May 2012.)I have a dirty little secret. I miss...
- Producer28/05/2017Wisdom Imparted On College Grads, An Entire Generation Is Enriched(The following is Patrick Scullin’s commencement address given to the recent graduates of Ohio State University. Enjoy!)Hello. It is an honor being here today. As I stand up here looking out on this enormous crowd of fresh faces, I’m curious how...
- Producer24/05/2017Wouldn't It Be Splendid if We Stopped Saying 'Awesome?'Go ahead. Admit it.This Bebee post is awesome.I realize you’ve only read nine words up until now, but that should be plenty for you to categorize this column’s brilliance by using the currently most overused, and thereby most annoying, word in the...
Comments25/05/2017 #7 Todd JonesWell above average post, Greg. In addition to "awesome", my personal pet peeve is the "Not a problem," response that is becoming an increasingly popular response to my offering of "Thank you." I don't know if it is regional thing, but it is very common in NY now.
Your post gives me an idea. The next time a waiter or waitress indicates that bringing me another beer or some ketchup is "Not a problem," when I say "Thank You," I will respond with a sarcastic measure of "Awesome."25/05/2017 #5 🐝 Fatima G. WilliamsAhhh Greg You are super funny. I just laughed out awesomely reading this buzz this morning. You make some valid points on the usage of awesome. Which makes me wonder why did you pick only awesome What about cool. I hear that alot. Btw this buzz is super awesome 😁😁😁😁😁🤣🤣🤣🤣 #stayawesome my favourite word 😊😊😊😊😉😉😉25/05/2017 #4 Paul Walters@Greg Schwem In Bahasa Indonisian the translation for Awesome is 'yip' Try that one out next time. It's easier to say, its shorter and the recipient will have no idea of what you just said. Next post please deal with the over use of the adjective " amazing!!!!!" Thanks great read
- Producer24/05/2017Bill Forces First Lady To Hold Prez’s HandRep. Emmett Russell III of Alabama has proposed a Congressional bill that would force the First Lady to hold hands with her husband.H.R. 321, “The Palm-to-Palm Act”, would make it a federal law that America’s First Lady must hold the hand of the...