- Producer07/06/2017Forty-Five and Friendless….Am I the Only One?This post originally appeared on my mommy blog: www.mommybrief.comAs I sit here contemplating all the stuff my son needs for his last week of 5th grade, and finishing the never ending baskets of wash and pretending like I am going to bed really soon...
Comments23/06/2017 #20 Lisa 🐝 GallagherHey girl, you rock! @Jennifer 🐝 Schultz :)) My daughter is experiencing something similar right now. Her little girl will be one year old in 2 weeks. She worked as a Nurse until she had the baby. She had friends and was always socializing in one way or another. I think in her case she changed... she was already a wonderful person but her mommy duties come first and foremost. I have a feeling that some of her friends who don't share her new values have sort of abandoned her. I told her to get involved with activities that involves moms/kids and she may meet new friends who do share her values! Life changes so much after we have children and we can even feel as though we've lost our identity. You've got this Jennifer! Your a sweetheart with and I can tell you would be fun to be around. Don't we both live in Pa? I'd love to meet up with you one day! We could even meet half way- that might be Harrisburg? I could even bring my daughter who will be 30 this year, I think you both would hit it off too, even if you had a long distance friendship :))11/06/2017 #18 AnonymousI've definitely found it much more difficult to find and maintain close friendships as an adult. I'm in my 40s and don't have kids, and I always assumed that mothers had it easier when it comes to friendships, because they had "automatic" social circles of other parents built around their kids' school and activities. Regardless of whether you have kids or not, everyone already seems to have their own close social circle.09/06/2017 #16 Brook Massey@Jennifer 🐝 Schultz, I believe that I am leading the dad version of your life. I have many acquaintance friends, but really no close friends. It is hard to squeeze time in between wife, kids, family, work, lawn,... When I have made concerted effort, it seems like everyone already has their own circle. They really are not interested. I am thankful for my wife, kids, family, job, co-workers and neighbors, though. Hang in there. Que sera, sera.08/06/2017 #9 Harvey LloydThis is a discussion my wife and i have many times. Friends are one thing but close friends are difficult to maintain. Not even considering family, schedules and personal goals, we have found that our small business experience for the last 25 years has lead us over paths that most never go on. Its difficult to share an experience with someone who doesn't understand.
We had so many friends in early marriage but they dropped off one by one as our journey to reach goals started to take off. Only one survived the journey as he also took the entrepreneurial path. But we are in such different circles we see each other once a year, maybe.
Relationships require emotional energy. With family and professional goals drawing a heavy demand on this energy it is difficult to muster even more for friends. We have resolved that where we are is a season of focus and that focus is family. Maybe the time for new friends will come after this season.08/06/2017 #8 Donna WoodRecently, I read somewhere that adults (even married adults) are lonelier today than they have ever been before, with most reporting they don't have friends outside of work. I think it's harder to make friends the older we get. We are set in our ways, beliefs and interests. Making time for ourselves to explore those ways, beliefs and interests is probably the first step in finding new friends. The trick is making the time for ourselves.07/06/2017 #6 Jennifer 🐝 Schultz#2 @Jan 🐝 Barbosa believe me, I so appreciate my friendship with my kids and my hubby. It would just be nice to have friends outside my family oasis once in a while! :-) Sounds like you made a great bond with your son - I am confident that he knows what a great relationship you two have and you will once again be best buddies after some of his life experiences.07/06/2017 #2 Jan 🐝 BarbosaMy best friend was my son !!! We went to the movies, saw Dexter, Arrested Development and Parks & Recreation on Netflix... Then poof !!! Yes.. the age when dads become "Old" and just "Dont Get It" meanwhile my wife and me are as different as mice and ostriches 🤔And to tell the truth finding soccer - sci-fi - gamers -fans over 40 is a chore... Guess im not the only one anymore !!!! 😆😆😆
- Producer09/06/201790 Degrees Error https://goo.gl/M9i3pL in your Baby's Horoscope #Astro4all https://goo.gl/BE2OYG #Trading $VIX #NewMom #MarketCrash #2017shift #Saturn #Ophiuchus #Recession #ContentMarketing #Astrology THEY LOOKED How did some people short the subprime while predicting market crash imminent? They...
- Producer08/06/2017The Matt Sweetwood Show • Learn How to Have a BIG Life I'm happy to share and invite you all to join me every Sunday night at 8 PM (EST) for a 30-minutes live discussion about everything that makes your life a BIG LIFE. We'll be talking about Relationships, Dating, Divorce, Parenting, Health,...
- Producer20/04/2017My first Buzz on BeBeehttps://getconnectdad.com/What is GetConnectDad?For the past year, 300+ parents from 26 countries have been answering the question, “What do I want my kids to value?” These parents have shared some great stories and many tips, all focused on, ‘How...
Comments16/04/2017 #1 Liesbeth Leysen, MSc. Brand Ambassador beBee, Inc.so true @Lyon Brave
- Producer"Love's Sacrifice""Love's Sacrifice"by MLTCGM 4/7/17Mommy, I miss you- why aren't you here?Oh honey, I wish I could be- but please know my heart is always near.But Mommy, what are you doing that is more important than me?Baby, you are the world, you are the...
Comments08/04/2017 #1 Devesh 🐝 BhattIf i may, something my grandmother used to say :
But when it is love. You do what you do . When it is love it is no sacrifice to you, but something that must be done.
If thing must be done and you give it all, why the regret?
The thing with people today is this that they are stuck midway. They neither accept the surrender, nor live their freedoms. Both co exist because we chose the direction of freedom.
I do not know if it is right or wrong in your context, but it worked for the one who got it and i believe it works for me :)
- 25/02/2017Wonderful way to reinforce trust between teens and parents, great way to develop mutual respect.
Love x-plan idea!X-Plan: Giving your kids a way out (#xplan)bertfulks.com Friends, as most of you know, I get to spend an hour each week with a group of young people going through addiction recovery. Yes. Young people. I’m talking teenagers who are locked away for at...
- 06/02/2017I was almost hesitant to share this yet because it just got started,
and I like to give things a “minute or two” before sharing it…
You know, let it run it’s course?
But as I was watching and listening to the feedback from the members in
this private group...
I knew you had to see today’s episode right away...
It’s a quick video (won’t take you long to watch) but it’s
literally packed with nothing but content and live results.How Mastering a Skill can yield Huge Resultswww.empowernetwork.com How Mastering a Skill can yield Huge...
- Producer17/08/2016How's *Your* Privilege?I heard a Pakistani immigrant girl on the CBC a few weeks ago complaining about racism in Canada. She told of how she was going to university and her new roommate said that 'Rule 1' of the household would be no cooking curry, because she couldn't...
Comments27/04/2017 #76 Nicole Chardenet#75 Much agreed, Natalie. In the end we all have to get along with each other. Talking about privilege other than white messes with a lot of folks' entitled sense of victimhood. And of course, fighting racism doesn't mean just fighting *white* racism, but the racism within all of us.24/04/2017 #75 Natalie ChickeeNice perspective and it's nice to see that you will admit being of white privilege, not all whites think they are privileged by default. At the end of the day though we were all humans and we need to all learn how to harmoniously coexist. I've mentioned the idea to some other Native Canadians and Blacks from Detroit and stated last week that we are privileged and they hated the idea of that. No white people are the only ones privileged. If you can access university education and a medical care you are privileged. My mom is white, I was raised in white privilege I guess. When I see some minorities who have more than some whites I grew up with, the idea of what that means, the line of privilege gets seriously blurred. Brown people have a different experience than African Canadians, First Nations, Inuits (Native Americans/Canadians). It's interesting they(CBC) didn't give a voice to the so called brown/minorities who have been here living in Canada for a longer time vis a vis, this spoiled person perspective. Shedding a light to give a broader picture of what the real issues other minorities experience in Canada experience and what racism really means in Canada so it can be eradicated. They can learn to appreciate that their parents are probably paying top dollar for them to come to our schools, to access our education. Who is accessing what and why.04/04/2017 #72 Nicole Chardenet#71 Lyon, I'm not at all convinced that young lady's difficult roommate problem was any different from many other peoples'. The roommate was a bully, plain and simple, and whether the Pakistani girl's freedoms were curtailed is unknown - did she bow to the roommate's wishes or demands? Or did she say, "Screw you, I'll cook whatever I want, and BTW your cabbage stew stinks up the house so if we have a no-curry rule, we'll also have a no-cabbage rule"? I had a bullying roommate for a short period of time many years ago (she moved in shortly before I moved out, had nothing to do with her) and she was a bully to *everyone*, dictating who would do this and who would do that and assigning us chores. We were all, as I recall, white. Fact is, the world is full of a*holes, and they never need much of an excuse to be one.
I wonder if the Pakistani girl stood up to the roommate or whether she knuckled under like a good little conflict-avoidant girl. Women's psychology - how does it not serve us sometimes? Explain. Discuss. Debate. :)
Just because I'm white doesn't mean I can't comment on issues of people of colour. Just because someone is male doesn't mean they can't have valid opinions or criticisms of women and feminist issues. If it's okay to support someone who belongs to a group you don't belong to, then it's okay to critically analyze them or that group as well. This political correctness that dictates who can comment on this or that is just a subtle and often bullying way of shutting down opinions one doesn't like. It's time to challenge prevailing thinking.
That's a general comment, BTW, not aimed at you. I don't think you're trying to bully me, just offering your opinion. But it's something to think about. Does political correctness subtly bully others into offering non-standard opinions? Explain. Discuss. Debate. :)01/04/2017 #71 Lyon BraveI appreciate lots of things about you. One you are very bold and honest with your opinions and you are not afraid to tackle race issues that are not your own. I do think all people of color should discuss race issues. However, bullying alone can create server problems. You reported the girl is being denied freedom in her own house and facing a series of ignorant and racist comments. People should feel comfortable and understood in their own house. Cooking curry might be a part of her identity. Perhaps, you should consider that just because something is a lesser evil of hate doesn't make it acceptable. Humans don't always need to share their opinions. And truthfully, though it is your right to write about race issues you will never understand them because you are not a woman of color, you are not brown. However as a woman you are a minority and I hear you. I think many of your points are valid but don't confuse people who report harassment and racism as playing the victim. Victims are often silent. Advocates are often vocal. Please keep sharing and I mean no offense.14/02/2017 #70 Nicole Chardenet#69 Actually, Paul, it's 'negativity bias' and it's a by-product of our evolution, which wired us to always expect trouble (since it was usually just around the corner), constant imminent death (which was usually imminent just around the corner), and to be wary and fearful of anyone who was not of our tribe or not exactly like us (because they were often unfriendly and dangerous).
However, we're not slaves to evolution or our wired brains. We have the capacity to move beyond that and challenge ourselves. And yes, there's a lot of power in victimhood - it will probably be the subject of a future blog post. Watch for my post tomorrow on how "It's all your parents' fault!" (Maybe a bit of a pre-victimhodd-blog-post taste :)12/02/2017 #69 Paul JacksonWe are an imperfect species which only focus on the negative aspects of life, this is a by-product of sin. Humanity was given free will and we have unfortunately chosen to just bitch and moan about everything. O, don't focus on any positivity in the world, that takes away the limelight from the "victims" in the world.09/09/2016 #62 Nicole Chardenet#60 BTW I think you're looking for Ben @Ben Pinto's link https://www.bebee.com/producer/@ben/cause-that-is-how-we-are08/09/2016 #60 Paul "Pablo" Croubalian#57 To quote the Beatles: "I'll get by with a little help from my friends." This rant of yours, plus one that you inspired that I want to link to but can't find (It was titled "because that's the way we are" or something like that) led me to write my https://www.bebee.com/producer/@paul-croubalian/emulsification-racism-and-getting-along .
I was also thinking about this post this morning. It's a quiet work day and I needed to think about stuff for my web-app-with-no-name.
So I got to cooking.
It's my father-in-law's 88th tomorrow, so I made his favs. I started with Jack Daniels infused orange marmalade. It will be served with homemade vanilla/Grand Marnier ice cream on puff pastry boats (now in the oven.)
I have a big-assed batch of basil tomato sauce simmering away to use in the lasagna/cannelloni/manicotti (I haven't decided which yet, but the pasta dough is ready)
I also made some tomato sherbert to use as ice cubes to keep the gazpacho cold. Did I mention the gazpacho?
My condo has waves of various aromas. The marmalade mixed with tomato was getting to me. I opened the windows.
That's when I saw Melissa, my neighbour. She was heading out.
She told me she couldn't stand the smells anymore. Not that they were bad, but that they were making her hungry. She was off to a Weight Watchers' meeting.
LOL08/09/2016 #59 Nicole Chardenet#55 WOW. I think I would have killed my kids (if I'd had any) if they referred to me as a 'white bitch'. What an awesome act, to move them to a whiter neighbourhood where they can learn to appreciate the other half of their DNA. You bring up a great point, which is that racism is ALWAYS wrong. Even when you're not white. 'Victimhood' isn't an excuse.08/09/2016 #57 Nicole Chardenet#52 Yes, and I very much appreciate everyone's support! It still amazes me how it drew little attention a few weeks ago when it was published (and I almost didn't for fear I would get flamed far and wide by the left) but then Paul and you and a few others found it and now it's got over 2,000 views! Thanks so much to all of you!08/09/2016 #56 Nicole Chardenet#50 You can come over to my apartment building and rant about all the curry smells you can find...along with fried fish and Goddess knows what else. I live in an immigrant 'hood in Toronto (and I'm an immigrant myself) and the halls are always filled with food smells. But my reaction is usually, "Oh please, invite me in for dinner!"
- Producer29/08/2016We've All Got One, So What's Yours?Nothing's more interesting than hearing a good story, unless, of course, it's a great or even fantastic story! #thedailychalkboard encourages you to think about yours today. Have a great week....
- 20/08/2016@Karthik Rajan always writes such great articles with lessons learned through personal stories.What My Dad Taught Me Without Even Trying. Something Beyond Twitter CEO’s Famous Advice To Entrepreneurs.www.linkedin.com Have you wondered what makes you who you are? I have. Here is my story. I had wanted to write this for long, never knew how it would fall out. That is the risk of writing about something close to...
Comments23/08/2016 #3 Margaret Aranda, MD, PhD@Deb 🐝 Helfrich: "My dad was comfortable being lost in the crowd and was equally at ease in charting his own narrative. He soothed my world with his work ethic. He made me believe miracles are possible with dint of a warm smile." I miss my Dad now. And love how your children are brought in at the end of the story, to let Grandpa live on. So so touching!20/08/2016 #2 Deb 🐝 HelfrichMUST READ beBee! This is so thoroughly touching that it brought tears for many readers. If you haven't met my dear friend, @Karthik Rajan, this is a fabulous introduction to his trademark A-ha moments that explain human relationships with stories that transcend cultures.20/08/2016 #1 Lisa 🐝 GallagherWhat a beautiful tribute to your dad @Karthik Rajan. I'm guessing after reading this and other articles you've written, you share many of your dad's attributes. Your daughter is lucky, she will grow up having high standards because she has such a great role model, her father! I can't imagine how much you do miss your dad, memories stir up so many emotions. Thank you for sharing!
- Producer22/08/2016How Male Bonding Builds Better BusinessPublished on The Good Men Project 8/20/16One meeting I had last week had a surprisingly different flow.My company is called beBee.com. It is an 18-month old professional social network (think LinkedIn on steroids), and is looking for more investors...
Comments28/10/2016 #30 Robert CormackI've seen this work in a similar environment, Matt. It's called a bar, and we don't care a smidge about race, creed, color or political affiliations. We share our lives, our concerns, our hopes and fears, all of which has a freeing effect, consummated by each arguing over who should pick up the bill. Just kidding. It's been so long since I've been in a bar, but I'd like to think we built the path for bonding in the boardroom. Men do get it, even if women think we're trogs.24/08/2016 #26 Vincent Andrew"From now on, when I hold business meetings (even if there are only men in the room), I am going to insist we begin by sharing something personal or interesting about ourselves. It really does build better business – and I will admit it, it feels good." Interesting idea. Worth a try to see what the effects may be. Thanks for sharing this @Matt 🐝 Sweetwood.23/08/2016 #23 Jim MurrayInteresting insight. @Matt 🐝 Sweetwood. In my advertising agency career I was in a lot of meeting like the one you described (a while ago now) and things never went like that. You tended to find out of about what people were like by their interests, sports, boating, shooting, golf etc. People seldom got personal and in hindsight, I think a lot of those meeting might have gone better, or at least more comfortably, if they had been like the one you just described. It's funny though because whenever I met with a creative director in a job interview situation, the conversation was almost 100% personal. Guess creative people are just nosier.23/08/2016 #21 Mamen 🐝 DelgadoLove that gentleman from the investment firm!! He is a beBee Bee, and probably by now he already knows it... ;) Great experience @Matt 🐝 Sweetwood, thanks so much for sharing it, so you are not the only one who has learned how to hold your next business meeting. Wish you the best!!! And kudos to you about your family story. All my love!23/08/2016 #19 Margaret Aranda, MD, PhD#13 After reading through the comments, yours is exactly where I started, too, @Mark Tillman Davis. You bring up excellent points that apply to a huge population of men, deserving of validation of course! I'm not a man, but I've been the only woman in a Conference Room full of male doctors thousands of times....and some of my best friends have always been men. Back in the day, I totally 'get' that a "man was a man" concept. But...today, the child isn't there just to be seen and not heard...parenting is not "Just do what I said." "BeCauSe I SaiD sO!" kinda thing. I'm raising my third generation of kids (no grandkids, humph!) so I've had my finger on the pulse. I think men should be men, and be the head of the family ~ testosterone wins out! Without going too extreme on what is presented, I'm thinking it may be better to look at this interaction more as 'mentoring' or 'parenting.' Because @Matt 🐝 Sweetwood is a single Dad. I baked my Dad Mother's Day cakes, to honor him as both a mother and father. So perhaps @Matt 🐝 Sweetwood, you are using that skill set here, not the 'crying mascara' 'drama' or talk of 'minutia' or gossip or blabber. Useful stuff. I'm thinking that is the angle. Matt? Being a single Dad has to matter.23/08/2016 #18 Margaret Aranda, MD, PhDI was a bit hindered at a discussion of male bonding instinctually (after working with primarily surgeons for eons and ions)...but here is my take, which took a full-on turn: you nurture your children (honors for being a single parent~so was my Dad); the first man nurtured you; then everyone nurtured one another & that's what women do, by nature. So I'm thinking that women:emotion is really women:nurture. And are we parenting/mentoring/teaching leaders to be leaders during these business meetings? I'd say, "Yes." So I'm Sharing to 'Parenting Hives." And look what you've done! Taught men about meetings and also about parenting and having families! You did it. You do it. Congrats!22/08/2016 #15 Lisa 🐝 GallagherExcellent article @Matt 🐝 Sweetwood. Thanks for tagging me. You wrote, "Everyone took turns sharing about themselves. The whole dynamic in the room changed. It was one of those moments you will remember long after the business part is forgotten." Helps to break the ice and really get to know others on another level.22/08/2016 #13 Mark Tillman DavisI have spent my entire adult life associated with men of "traditional" masculinity. These men would view the author's concept of "enlightened masculinity" as what we refer to as the feminization of men. We "Neanderthals" don't spend much time talking to each other about our feelings or sharing. We talk smack. We cuss. We use the "f" word like a comma. We don't give a thought to each others race or ethinicity or cultural background. It doesn't matter. What we have shared are difficult times in harsh environments. Life and death stuff. I would trust these men with my life, my wallet and my family.
My father and grandfathers weren't big "sharers" either. They taught me my role as a man. Do the right thing in the right way for the reasons because that's what men do...and when you don't, be prepared for consequences. I idolize them and the men of their generations. Bonding between men happens as result of genuine experiences; not from an announcement that "at this point in the meeting, we're gonna' share."
- 16/08/2016If you think running a startup makes work-life balance impossible., just be glad you don't have to balance homework and puberty! Check out this great young entrepreneur!The young entrepreneur with big plans but 'still has to do homework' - BBC Newswww.bbc.com Twelve-year-old entrepreneur Henry Patterson tells the BBC how running a successful business has changed his...
Comments16/08/2016 #1 Margaret Aranda, MD, PhD@Michele Williams - great find! How much can we learn from him? What a genius - I hope he still plays with Legos....just hate to see kids grow up too fast. I'm glad he's still worried about school. And he speaks so freely - tells me that he must have a stay-at-home Mom who saw his brilliance and supported his genius. There's a genius inside of each and every child