Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات · 3 دقائق وقت القراءة · +100 ·

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Curled Emotions and Experiences

Curled Emotions and Experiences

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While drafting a buzz on water surface tension as a metaphor for human tension a new idea emerged. This temporarily shifted my interest to the idea of this buzz. Just by looking at the photos below you may observe what is the common denominator among them.

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It is curling up into ball shapes. Many livings species shape into balls. Some plants do. Few animals do. Few humans curl up into a ball while asleep. Water drops, and soaps roll up into balls. Few marine species do. Why is that?

There are joint factors between most of them. One factor is the tendency to curl up when exposed to danger. It is not only flight or flight; more a third option is available to curl up into balls. Another factor is for the balls to have the minimum surface area to volume ratio and the fear of losing water through evaporation is minimized by acquiring a ball shape. It is a fear-based shape- the fear of losing water.

Forming into a ball shape allows some animals to roll down a slope very fast and run away from their predators. Many plants have leaves that curl up under stress. It is amazing that humans behave similarly. Some people tend to curl up while asleep under stress. Interestingly, curling up during sleep reflects on the mood of the sleeping person. Studies have shown that our sleeping pattern reflect on us. Of interest here is curling up while asleep- it shows the sleeper is seeking to return to their comfort zone after a stressful day. People who have the habit of sleeping in this pattern are found to be tension-sleepers because they over worry and like to stay in their comfort zone. They worry for fear they might be forced out of their comfort zone. It is not only body language; it is also the sleeping language. The higher the knees and lower the head the more internal comfort these people get because they fall more into a ball-like shape.

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The question that overwhelms me- plants, animals and some materials tend to curl up into ball shapes- where they did learn the same trick to avoid predators? I mean tangible predators and the intangible ones such as anxiety.

Cats tend to curl up when they are afraid. Why some of us tend to curl up while asleep?

Some plants curl up for the whole summer to conserve water. They open their leaves during winter. The fear of losing their water keeps them folded for months. Other plants like the sensitive plant behaves very strangely. Not only of its ball-like head, but also of the behavior of its leaves. Touch one leaf gently and it shall fold inwards. Now, moving your hand to touch many leaves these leaves shall fold inwards and the hidden thorns shall appear. This plant reacts to calculated risks as the reaction to danger is proportional to the perceived risk.

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We need to learn from nature. There are hidden facts that shall only emerge when we unfold “our leaves of ignorance”. We don’t want our minds to curl up into balls and do nothing. Fear, anxiety and demotivating emotions might put us in this state. See beyond anxiety and open your mind to new possibilities. Curling up is stressing. When we feel stresses our toes curl under. Your foot has a strange shape because the muscles, tendons, or ligaments that surround your toe aren't balanced. This causes the toes to bend in an odd position. Relax and free yourself of anxiety.

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@Amy L Thome wrote a heart-touching buzz. In the background image of the buzz the quote by Roald Dahl "...the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places". I say don’t hide your problems in secret places because this shall only lead to curling up on self and suffer from its prolonged stressful effects.

Great buzz, great thinking and soul-illuminating by @Clau Valerio
"Sorry = strength. The images are outstanding, and the meanings are admirable.
Patience and tolerance are considered important values ​​to some extent. However, when someone harms or harms us, responding with patience and tolerance seems to transmit weakness and passivity. This is one of the main reasons why it is so hard for us to forgive others".

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We don’t want to live a stressed life like a scared rabbit living under stress. When rabbits are stressed, it often shows. Separate to sleeping, the most visible sign is a rabbit who has curled up, with their paws tucked in underneath them and ears hanging down. Breathing can also become quicker.

Uncurl your life.


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التعليقات

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #120

#125
Meaning of words get tweaked and change overtime dear Lisa Vanderburg. Now, I understand the origin of the term. Thank you for educating me.

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #119

#124
haha...I looked it up: it's considered an offensive term these day - my bad! It was meant to denote my lack of skills in comparison to Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic's greater command for language and sophistication. ''The term characterized farmers having a red neck caused by sunburn from hours working in the fields. A citation from 1893 provides a definition as "poorer inhabitants of the rural districts...men who work in the field, as a matter of course, generally have their skin stained red and burnt by the sun, and especially is this true of the back of their necks".[9]'' Wikipedia. Now of course, it has political connotations that I was less aware of - most certainly wouldn't have used it if I knew!

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #118

#123
If you were Redneck dear Lisa Vanderburg then who is sophisticated? I don't know the origin of redneck or whether it has to do with the red color, if any. You have the color of sophistication.

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #117

#122
Yes, I know, but...I just don't know how y'all do it - talk about such sensitivities in another language - quite breath-taking! I am a mere redneck by comparison!

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #116

#118
Dear Lisa, it's not about understanding the nuances of English, it's about simplifying things and striving for clarity as Nietzsche stated in his famous quote. Thanks for the empathy. It's always welcome. P.S. Ali isn't the native English speaker also. :-)

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #115

#120
Yes, I think philosophers would also agree with you. :-)

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #114

#115
Maybe you are correct concerning the word love. But love is representative of the broader human condition of life meaning. Its merely a discussion concerning a perspective of this condition and how we interface with the reality. I agree its all a bit philosophical in nature and to some degree weighty in concept.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #113

#118
Indeed, way to go and the discovery journey goes on dear Lisa Vanderburg

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #112

In catching up from #102 to #114: #106 Harvey wonderful prose; talk of dragons and Black Forests and then later 'the need for “emotional intelligence''. It's is with empathy I address you dear Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic, even though I'm unsure if it's welcome, I cannot imagine how all these nuances can be totally understood when English isn't your native tongue! If the tables were turned, I'd certainly be lost! #114 Babel is a mastery observation. We can now see conceptionally, how another dragon could arise - it clearly won't in this case. Way to go Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee!

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #111

#105
So sorry I'm late - I am in total agreement#102 to what you kindly said Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee; I'm eager to see the outcome on Monday!

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #110

#115
Great point and I don't dispute it. This is exactly what I am writing in my next buzz. For me, when love exceeds limits and go beyond the extreme it generaties what I call "antilove" feelings. These include jealousy, possessiveness and the tendency to protect and control the beloved ones. Divorce has many reasons, but sometimes over-jealousy becomes the antilove poison. ANtiloves is coined in emulation of antifragility. Here, love makes us weaker than when we started loving. I shall explain in my next buzz what I mean.

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #109

#112
Simply put, I meant to say that, to me, the whole conversation about love doesn't have a sense. Why overthinking the word love? And what divorce rates depression and opioid addictions have to do with whether love is a noun, verb, or feeling. Overthinking is the antithesis of thinking clearly. :)

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #108

#112
The issue even though sounds easy, it shadows a bigger one. How clear are we of the meaning of many words that we use?

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #107

#111
Believe me dear Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic I understood you, but sometimes it is better to sidetrack an understanding.

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #106

#109
yes this rabbit hole runs deep and rightfully as you state clarity is lost. I do not profess to be in or out of the hole but rather a observer phenomenology Divorce rates depression and opioid addictions here represent relationships breaking down into the loss of “that loving feeling” If this is the case then love the noun “feeling” is not being met by the verb I also sense that the rise in the need for “emotional intelligence is related to this phenomena I am like you in the sense I am conscientious as opposed to openness so I am very much aware of cause and effect.

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #105

#110
Unfortunately Ali, I was misunderstood. :-(

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #104

#109
Oh dear Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic- i Googled if love is a noun or verb and I was amazed by the number of searches I found. As I said before I love you makes love a verb; whereas my love means love is a noun. Yes, sometimes simple things aren't that easy to comprehend.

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #103

#94
Harvey, please don't get me wrong, and I really don't want to be misunderstood, but my engineer's mind just doesn't comprehend the meaning of the "concept of a noun", or how I experience love as a verb and describe it as a noun. :-) I recently read an article where an author even stated that love isn't feeling but a verb. What to say. My mind doesn't work that way. I always strive for clarity without the use of profound-sounded phrases, generally speaking. Although an idea or thought that pops up in our mind may sound worth exploring, thinking deeply about something can be in the expense of clarity.

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #102

#94
Harvey, please don't get me wrong, and I really don't want to be misunderstood, but my engineer's mind just doesn't comprehend the meaning of the "concept of a noun", or how I experience love as a verb and describe it as a noun. :-) I recently read an article where an author even stated that love isn't feeling but a verb. What to say. My mind doesn't work that way. I always strive for clarity without the use of profound-sounded phrases, generally speaking. Although an idea or thought that pops up in our mind may sound worth exploring, thinking deeply about something can be in the expense of clarity.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #101

#106
Yes, I agree that if we deliberately try to "change the path for any other" we are bound to fail. However; it is totally different when it does so without deliberately trying to. For example, I have had many exchanges with you. If I claim that you did affect my path Harvey Lloyd, without you intending to. I experienced this. As for your experience with dragons I find great lessons from them. AT least, you influenced my thinking.

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #100

#105
Am i worthy to the challenge. My stint with corporate America did not need well. I was cocky and thought that if those idiots could do it so can I. This sounded good as i walked out the door of the large conglomerate of a utility company. So with 2,000 in my pocket and enough apathy to make millions i began my business. Apathy gave way to tunnel vision of success and then the stark reality of who the hell did i think i was. Who in their right mind would find confidence enough in me to write me a check to perform a service? It was three years in the dragon pit of slaying dragons of self confidence, secretly. The whole while i was presenting to others this false narritive of success. This dragon alone nearly killed me. But with the help of a few key people and mentors they began to shape my Excalibur. The sword that would create the path out of the pit. It hinged on a single thought. Regardless of who we are we all seek answers to questions posed by ourselves or environment. Success was in figuring out the question and answering it in a way the customer could find security. Sleepless nights of studing this doctrine lead me to many successes. Make no mistake it is a journey through the Black Forest. Slaying every self generated demon one can imagine. I would not change the path for any other.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #99

#101
and #103 - I wonder if you would consider sharing the "dragons of challenges and experiences" that you went through in your life journeys. In them there must be great stories to share.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #98

#103
Wonderful and I imagine that then you are at least in partial agreement with my comment #102 addressed to Lisa Vanderburg

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #97

#100
I would say in this context we curl up in response. Yes dragons beget dragons. With each door we pass we see the world differently. What was past slayed dragons are revived with new understanding. (Our uncle though has created boundaries whereby dragons are not an issue. The world is closed in and rigid. No doors, no journey merely the perfect defense.) Curling is the limbic system response to challenge. Our mind is the weapon we have to deny the limbic systems auto response. But the limbic system is formidable. It gathers all of the sub conscious thought of what could go wrong. Our higher thinking needs to provide the things that can go right and most importantly provide the alternative of doing nothing. I may only have a 2% chance of slaying the dragon, but doing nothing holds the truth i will either die or fight everyday the same battle. This alternative is null. With each days battle of 2% chance there exists a future where wisdom will prevail.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #96

#101
You know Lisa Vanderburg as new thoughts and possibilities emerged in my mind. Love is emergence and a new beginning that shall expose me to new dragons and new challenges. Love is to grow by learning and exploring and not possessive love that make your world small by curling it up.

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #95

#97
Absolutely. We cannot slay the true dragon for it is legion; we can only know that it is there and battle one at a time. You have picked the right weapon for its power and you must carry its heavy weight, but it is so worth it!#93 It is your agape love Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee that understands the immensity (and impossibility) of another's burden, and I know you would carry mine for me without complaint, such is your strength.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #94

#99
Great and I understand from your comment that as we move forward in life new dragons shall emerge unless we curl up like a ball. Is curling up is a dragon by itself?

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #93

#98
I think you described it well. The possibilities are endless beyound the dragons of the mind. With each we slay the turning becomes easier. We now have the key to chaos and its exploration. My challenge is always the alternative. We only have one of two ways to approach things, curl up and make ourselves small or, with humbleness, draw Excalibur and slay the dragon that we have created. Each has its merits within the moment. The choice establishes the dragons we fight tomorrow.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #92

#97
When you refer to the mystical dragon you remind me of the mystical dragonfly, which represents our ability to go in many directions, see many possibilities, explore, sense and hover like a helicopter. So, they aren't the same and that the dragon that developed into a dragonfly learnt it lessons in life. A mi correct?.

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #91

#90
The mystical dragon is an ageless concept that captures the rolling thunder of thought within the universe we call the mind. Amazingly the dragon is what we deny, blame others for, or simply learn to cope. But he is but a beast of thought. We have the Excalibur to slay the dragon. But if it dies then our mind would be lost within a vacuum. Our way of life somehow changed to infinity. What lies beyound? The dragon represents our fears within the present while blocking any thoughts of the future where we survive. Once we slay the first and survive we begin to understand the landscape of wisdom. The dragon is only the key to the next door. I dont think the fairy tales of old were far off the mark.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #90

#95
Emotions lead to actions. Love is a strong emotion and therefore we feel its actions. So is hatred and other emotions. I believe within this context emotions may be considered both as noun or verb.

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #89

#87
Not wrong in context but as we live love it is the verbs aspect that we experience. After the experience we use it as a noun to describe the experience. Hollywood and media have shown us actions that have defined the feeling of love (Noun). These actions when presented to us, by whatever means, defines the noun in our senses. I have never gotten in trouble with the noun. But the verb has gotten me in plenty of trouble. This is more a thought experiment as we look at life and use the word love. Mainly to ask the question what have i put in my bucket where the noun draws the verb to action?

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #88

#91
No disagreement here. Webster did get it right. In reality though we experience love in action. We see hear and feel the act of love and describe these actions within the concept of the noun. Actions define the definition of the noun for each of us. A TV show, movie or personal experience filling the love noun bucket and eventually we have a personal definition of love. We experience love as a verb and describe it as a noun. Would the noun be relevant if first we had not experienced the verb?

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #87

#92
So, I shall deny the dragon inside me do that it shall be your peril dear Lisa Vanderburg

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #86

#86
Such a perfect and fitting tale Harvey. Rolls nicely into #88 your comment, Ali; if we deny the dragon inside of all of us, it will be at the peril of someone we love (verb & noun, as Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic said). And that's #89 why we need accountability to someone beyond reproach.

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #85

#83
Love is a noun and a verb. :-)

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #84

#86
I find my dragon in people of your quality as you are Harvey Lloyd

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #83

#85
You said again dear Lisa Vanderburg "Holding a life is love is illusional...a responsibility that may belong fleetingly, but I have to be reminded constantly, is NOT my job - it's God's". This is consistent with my previous comment addressed to you. So, even love needs protection by something larger than us and outside us. You show great brilliance in these comments even if love fainted your heart sometimes with responsibility.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #82

#84
You bring to our attention dear Lisa Vanderburg a new paradox "we put into jeopardy what we seek to protect". I may add sometimes we may cause those we love to hate us. This happens when our love becomes so possessive that we try to control or protect those we love. They get annoyed and even may become antagonistic to us.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #81

#83
I love you means love is a verb Her love is.. means love is noun. This is a challenging idea Harvey Lloyd. If I consider love as a verb only then my most read and commented on buzz here @beBee means it is wrong because in it I asked what is the opposite of love. I have even to reconsider writing my next buzz. Even in your comment you used the love as a noun "i expose my heart of love". In this context love is a noun. Still; it is a challenging comment because the love of love is reflected in our behaviors. So, love produces action and in this sense it is a verb. Need to assimilate your comment.

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #80

#85
I was listening to a Clinical Psycologist on the YTube and he told a story about his nephew. It may apply here. He visited the boy and the family had said he was having night terrors. Waking up screaming in the middle of the night. One morning at breakfast he opened up a discussion with the young child about his terrors. He explained that he wakes up in a field and these round blobs are coming after him. He takes his sword and kills them but they just keep coming. He said that last evening he looked up and there was dragon spitting these things out that were after him. The Uncle said then what do you have to do? I must slay the dragon. No night terrors that night and the child came to breakfast happy. He had to inquire about the dragon and the child merely stated “he’s dead”. Moral here. Sometimes we are slaying the small stuff while we igonore the dragon that is expelling all small things. Find your dragon, you know what you need to do. ⚔️

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #79

#83
Such a gem of a heart, Harvey! It takes great perseverance to live this life; holding a hand may be small steps, holding a love is life. Holding a life is love is illusional...a responsability that may belong fleetingly, but I have to be reminded constantly, is NOT my job - it's God's. I'm abso-doodly-sure our beloved Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee would agree....this is faith, not religeon. Ane more to the point; this is what I am learning from you giant-hearted men.

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #78

#82
Can't argue with that! In fact, I promote it as something 'forewarned is forearmed' as if we don't see that coming, we put into jeopardy what we seek to protect. A fabulous spin-off, dear friend!

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #77

#81
Love is a verb. Its not a noun. Love describes an act of selfless giving with no expectations of something in return. In relationships we tend to use the word love as a noun and expect quid pro quo. But think about this context. How i define love within the noun is quite different from how my wife defines it. So can quid quo pro actually occur. Through acts of kindness that evolve from deep understanding of my wife’s need i expose my heart of love. SHe is willing to let me carry her heart and her mine. Doesn’t mean i dont drop it sometimes. But we always self correct and laugh once we are past the cleaning up of the heart. This is called life. No perfection, just plain living with the curly hairs that show up over time in a fashion of trust.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #76

#81
Dear Liza- your comment reminds me of sweet things turning to toxic if allowed to go beyond the extreme. Love is one example as I shall show in my next buzz. Sweet roots may turn toxic because we allowed things to go beyond our capacity and thus allowing them to turn direction and interest. For example, with extreme love we may feel we own the other person. This feeling of ownership may turn into a desire to control the beloved one or to overprotect him.her. The beloved one soon starts to get annoyed by our expressiveness to control and/or protect and starts stepping away. Love has its own toxicity. Most likely our friend CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit will not be in agreement with me.

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #75

#77
It takes men of pure hearts to give words to entities such as love and trust; I couldn't define them better as you and Ali #79 did. Thank you. #80 When love is grown on a poisoned root, this leads to addition, idolitry and destruction. If that poisoned root is given from parent to child in the guise of love, it kills much more than potential. Your father was a beacon of the RIGHT way of paternal love, as shines through you today.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #74

#77
It is an interesting comment. The two types of trust. Same with love as it has been classified to have four levels: • Storge—empathy bond. • Philia—friend bond. • Eros—erotic bond. • Agape—unconditional "God" love. Source- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Four_Loves The big question for me is when love leads to addiction- does it stay as love?

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #73

#76
and #78 Dears Lisa Vanderburg- my father was an example of this love. He had to undergo a surgery for stomach ulcer while he was in his thirties.. More than 50% of his stomach was removed. The surgeon couldn't give him anesthetics before the surgery because his body was too weak to even a minor dosage. He was operated for hours while praying. His love for God served him well.

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #72

#72
The love to which you speak, Agape, is direct propitiation to the level of faith an individaul has gained. Fear and faith can not share the same space. I know and admire these same people. They seem to act on a different plain of understanding. I can say its just out of my reach, but maybe their is hope.

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #71

#66
I have always thought of “trust” in two ways. There is covenant trust. Then there is the trust we speak of, Heart Trust. I mean the heart in biblical terms. Covenant trust is what we experience in the world within agreements and covenants like wedding vows. Heart trust is a relationship where you can share your fears for what they are, a person attempting to work through issues. Myself, i only have one other, outside of the wife, that i have this style trust. But this trust is usually only available through a relationship where love exists. Is it reliable? If you dont rely on it then it can never grow within its shared wisdom. So no the fear can make it unreliable. The alternative to reliance though is a rough road.

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #70

#72
I love this comment CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit; agape love. It is very rare to behold - maybe even rarer to maintain as we're commited within the frame work of time. It is so pure I have only felt it in faith or in the innocence of a child to their parent. I know this comment was addressed to Harvey, but I could not hold back; so strong is the desire to see more agape love! Thanks Manjit!

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #69

#74
Will do

CityVP Manjit

منذ 5 سنوات #68

#73
Look forward to reading it, send me a private message when you are publishing it.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #67

#72
I am planning to publish next Monday a buzz based on the sound comments here and surely yours dear CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit shall be referred to. Love is a complex emotion and has many facets to consider. You have already triggered the "the ideas gun" in my head.

CityVP Manjit

منذ 5 سنوات #66

#52
Extreme love is agape, but while i have found a few people who love without condition, invariably because we live in a conditioned world, we have conditioned love., Harvey, one thing that I have been privileged to see is extreme love in action, agape in the full sense of that world. The step beyond Agape is God but I cannot conceptualize the ultimate nor entertain the many prescriptions for what others think God is, for it is beyond my human ability to know - but agape love, that I have seen and it is a very humbling experience when one is witness to that human being with the capacity for this extreme love.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #65

#70
You are correct dear . It is not only fight or flight; it is also freeze. Freezing means no movement, shrinkage, living in fear with all its bad consequences. This is a stressful state and I agree fully with you.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #64

#68
I feel your breath and it is inspirational

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #63

#67
my stupid computer will 'swim with the fishes' just as soon as I work out how to do it....annoying machine. Now I am intrigued; I shall be a fly and visit so I can sit on your shoulder and feast my compond eyes on you! :)

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #62

#66
Oh dear Lisa Vanderburg- I have no problems with commenting. May be it is your computer going into chaos. I wish you were sitting next to me this moment to reveal to you how your comments along with previous comments have kindled my mind and the birth of new ideas. I shall be sharing my emerging thoughts soon with reference to comments here.

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #61

#47
#45 #55 Other thoughts Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee (because I don't think the comment-link is working? Manjit - I looked at my six-pack (I keep it hidden under a paunch of fat) and laughed at your last paragraph, but 'folds' aside, your right...we must be limber as a seal. Harvey - because you reread Manjit's comment, so did I (not an original thought, but hey). 'The reduction of fear would also imply the increase in trust.' Is that really...reliable though? Divorce attorneys grow fat on words such as these, no? Is it possible to reach that point and keep it sustained? Or is our best form of love ''staying on the edge" as Ali said?

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #60

#56
Wish I could claim credit...if it lights your fire Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee, I'm thrilled! :)

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #59

#52
'Love in its extreme form is “pure grace” to another while the giver has no judgement. For man i dont feel we can offer this up in any real form with longevity.' That's the cruncher that erodes; as you say, 'we are broken', Harvey Lloyd. My 'love' is undoubtably tainted. It's judgemental. I cannot in truth say otherwise. When I look at [say] those lovely images of Mother Theresa or read her works, even her capacity for selfless love is still limited to this 'human-suit' we wear. Moreso, if we think we can stay pure under duress, we'll make even more mistakes. That will have a knock-on effect until somebody pulls out or worse. So if we go into a situation knowing it'll evolve/devolve and be in constant flux AND realize we are far from perfect and will have horrid selfish thoughts, only then can we have a hope in hell of even trying on someone elses shoes. Sure as dogs go under porches to die, we can NEVER walk in them!

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #58

#61
I am so glad that I invited you to the discussions dear Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic. I understand you very well for being originally a materials scientist I spent lots of time working with engineers. Yes, when we are fatigued by fear and anxiety we curl up like slab concrete does. You remind me of my the thought of my daughter Sara when she was very young. She told me one day "dad, because I love you so much I stopped loving you". Now, I understand better what she meant. Because I used to travel very frequently she was always woried about me for fear something bad would happen to me. That fear made her bent curl under tension. Thank you dear Lada for your great comment.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #57

#53
With your broad and diversified experiences Harvey Lloyd I find it difficult to tell if I am conversing or making dialogue with you

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #56

#48
Interesting question indeed. One of the greatest examples of the curled structure is the steel and timber bridge over the Grand Union Canal - the Rolling Bridge. It's indeed an engineering feat. https://youtu.be/x0Dj7XA77hw But, we can also see the curling deformation on concrete slabs, thin-walled steel structures or metal cladding, as a response to loading but also to temperature. It's a tendency of a structure to shift when in either tension or compression. When it comes to plain concrete slabs used for pavement, for example, it results in fatigue cracking due to temperature curling, i.e. differences in temperature between the top and bottom surfaces during the day and night. One thought came to my mind while writing this - fatigue occurs when a material is subjected to repeated loading and unloading. As for humans, it means repeated exposure to stress in life. If humans tend to curl up under stress, what the curling process means to our fatigue resistance? What is our fatigue limit before starting "cracking"?

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #55

#52
You shocked me with your comment my friend Harvey Lloyd I decided to write my next buzz on love and what I coined "Antilove". Your comment read almost 50% of what I intend to write. I shall reveal in the next buzz what I mean. I am deeply moved by your comment and your explanations here.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #54

#51
Since reading your last buzz dear Randall Burns

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #53

#50
Thank you for enriching my knowledge dear Lisa Vanderburg. Now, I know the difference between dialogue and conversation. I am conversing with you.

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #52

#35
I am glad i brought a smile. Coffee in the morning with my wife is where we slay the dragons of yesterday to sharpen the sword for the day we find ourselves. You post about Split was heart warming as it told me that others seek this beverage of choice within enlightenment. I feel less alone in the world. Although i enjoy the enlightenment aspects within my personal stage, it is becoming obvious that enlightenment is something that must be metered. Information overload can bring one libation in lieu of caffeine. I have conjured pictures of setting within the metaphorical Split and absorbing great understanding. Thanks for your post and thoughts here.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #51

#49
Great comment and you provided me with a great idea dear Lisa Vanderburg. I visited the link and I am planning to respond in a buzz soon.

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #50

#45
I reread your comment and it dawned on me a great statement within “fear of love”. This really may point to something within our consideration of love. Love is the absence of fear within a relationship. But this, as usual, brings us back full circle to the thoughts of eliminating fear from a relationship. The reduction of fear would also imply the increase in trust. You provoke some interesting thoughts here.

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #49

#51
What an adorable petit choux bun you are Randall Burns - thank you! Like you, I KNOW I'm a tiny stinging ant in the Redwoods, but you then are a wild cat...no barking squirrell work in you, Chef du beBee :) It's an absolute blast hangin' with the big boys......I'm counting you in here!

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #48

#41
I believe Randall Burns gets us started on determining the differences between dialogue and conversation. I converse about topics that i do not have complete understanding. In an effort to explore concepts between different people. Dialogue is a pointed discussion where knowledge is at the top of concern. Generally meaning that points and counter points are displayed by knowledgeable people. I prefer conversation where i need not be an expert but submit my thoughts as any other would. To solicit feedback in like manner. Non competitive if you will.

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #47

#45
Love is a very challenging topic. From my perspective i can only witness “acts” of love. From this i can only interpret the meaning of the act from my own narritive. Given this position what can i compare love to? My narritive is subjective to the experiences and 1st principals as i interpret them. This leaves me with only metophor to describe that which can not be seen but only felt in my own unique way. Your word “extreme” as an adjective is a bit challenging also. Man is broken. We are capabale of love within a limited scope. By broken i mean we really cant cast ourselves aside for another. Externally it may look like we are, but internally there is turmoil that we must digest. Love is an ongoing process where we really see commitment to its end. Sometimes this love is hiding and others it shines like the brightest star. Love in its extreme form is “pure grace” to another while the giver has no judgement. For man i dont feel we can offer this up in any real form with longevity. But Hollywood has offered us a love that only offers up the physical aspects of love. Pain and suffering and total bliss. The closest we get to this pure love is within a child’s eyes. A love that we can interpret what those eyes tell us in only a reflection. This reflection fades as they begin to form their own thoughts and opinions. Love changes at this point to grace. A grace that we see the future of a new being seeking its own understanding of love. Our love is in sharing that journey.

Randall Burns

منذ 5 سنوات #46

#50
Comment away Lisa Vanderburg You're insightful, intelligent, funny, etc. I can't think of any reason why you shouldn't partake in the "conversation". (after all it isn't a dialogue) :-) I jump into conversations way out of my league, that's a learning process. I'm surrounded by intellectual giants here on beBee, (I'm absolutely serious with that comment), how much more fun can we have? I could go on and on but I'm sure every one else is going to chime in. It's an absolute pleasure interacting with you Lisa!

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #45

#41
According to this: https://goo.gl/7693Bq the difference between dialogue and conversation is dialogue is somewhat planned and usualy between two bodies. Conversation is shootin' the breeze....which is why I love beBee. Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic recent https://goo.gl/xqUwXM discusses LI v BB; WAY to out of my league, but I like the conversation here. I do know a couple of people who don't share my taste in discussion and feel that I shouldn't comment on a buzz; they may have a point? All fabulous Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee!

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #44

#45
'Extreme love is the testing limit whether it is love or an illusion of love.' At this point CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit says Fractauls Forever :) LMAO at the 'bear-bait' exchange between Randall Burns...lol Like Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic, I stuggle to put massive labels on small triats: https://www.inc.com/business-insider/11-daily-habits-reveal-personality-traits-science-says.html

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #43

Dear Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic- if your time would allow you I would love your feedback from an engineering point of view on the curled up structures and how it relates to the stability of structures

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #42

#45
#45 Great points CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit. You said it that many people have limited capacity to not overflow with extreme love. This is the reality and what research finds. You remind me of a presentation that I wrote few years back titled "The Problems of Surplus" https://www.slideshare.net/hudali15/the-problems-of-surplus. In this presentation I give examples of issues related to surplus and the possibilities and effects of Going to the extreme has different challenges than staying close or near the middle. Extreme love is an example. Like all complex systems we have now a new and challenging situation being far-from-equilibrium, commonly know as staying on the edge". This time staying on the edge of extreme love. Either the system emerges into a new and self- organizing structure, or collapse of the love shall happen. It is finding the organized zone in the chaotic region of extremes. Your comment is fascinating and I need a dedicated buzz to respond adequately. Dear Lisa Vanderburg- this discussion may be of interest to you.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #41

#45
Great points @Harvey Lloyd. You said it that many people have limited capacity to not overflow with extreme love. This is the reality and what research finds. You remind me of a presentation that I wrote few years back titled "The Problems of Surplus" https://www.slideshare.net/hudali15/the-problems-of-surplus. In this presentation I give examples of issues related to surplus and the possibilities and effects of Going to the extreme has different challenges than staying close or near the middle. Extreme love is an example. Like all complex systems we have now a new and challenging situation being far-from-equilibrium, commonly know as staying on the edge". This time staying on the edge of extreme love. Either the system emerges into a new and self- organizing structure, or collapse of the love shall happen. It is finding the organized zone in the chaotic region of extremes. Your comment is fascinating and I need a dedicated buzz to respond adequately. Dear Lisa Vanderburg- you are mentioned in Manjit's comment.

CityVP Manjit

منذ 5 سنوات #40

#43
Extreme love is great but only a few people are capable of extreme love for the rest of us we mostly live in the fear of love. You have just featured the link to @Lisa Vanderburg and Lisa is a good example of someone who epitomizes extreme love. Extreme love is the testing limit whether it is love or an illusion of love . Love cannot distance us from reality because that is not love, people who lack that reality maybe doing something in the name of love but it is not love, it is an illusion that we feed. In their song "Pride - In the Name of Love'" U2's chorus says it all : "in the name of love, what more in the name of love". https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByuyP1PNqKQ It is not a given that anything that goes to the extreme is bad for us, but we are not ready for a world with extreme love - many of us cannot handle the mildest form of love. When love is a possession or a drug or a fantasy how can that love be real - for real love will test us and for must of us, it is beyond our emotional and physical capacity, so we settle for the illusion of love - and that is why I hate personal brand with a vengeance, because it is a denial of that which is true. Our body itself is designed with many curls that give us more real estate rather than less, whether it is the folds in our brain, or the curly weave of our gut, we constantly underestimate what nature has bestowed within us - and love is no different - for love to travel the globe, it must curl around it or it is lost in space.

CityVP Manjit

منذ 5 سنوات #39

#43
Extreme love is great but only a few people are capable of extreme love for the rest of us we mostly live in the fear of love. You have just featured the link to Lisa Vanderburg and Lisa is a good example of someone who epitomizes extreme love. Extreme love is the testing limit whether it us love or an illusion of love . Love cannot distance us from reality because that is not love, people who lack that reality maybe doing something in the name of love but it is not love, it is an illusion that we feed. In their song "Pride - In the Name of Love'" U2's chorus says it all : "in the name of love, what more in the name of love". https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByuyP1PNqKQ It is not a given that anything that goes to the extreme is bad for us, but we are not ready for a world with extreme love - many of us cannot handle the mildest form of love. When love is a possession or a drug or a fantasy how can that love be real - for real love will test us and for must of us, it is beyond our emotional and physical capacity, so we settle for the illusion of love - and that is why I hate personal brand with a vengeance, because it is a denial of that which is true. Our body itself is designed with many curls that give us more real estate rather than less, whether it is the folds in our brain, or the curly weave of our gut, we constantly underestimate what nature has bestowed within us - and love is no different - for love to travel the globe, it must curl around it or it is lost in space.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #38

#42
Only if love doesn't make us too much curled to talk with other people and so distant us from reality. A very good point CityVP \ud83d\udc1d Manjit

CityVP Manjit

منذ 5 سنوات #37

If fear makes us curl then we must uncurl, but if love makes us curl then who would not want to be in that position !

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #36

#40
Now, I wonder what is the difference between dialogue and conversation. Please remember English isn't my mothers' tongue

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #35

#38
I find the word commentssss restrictive. It’s a conversation 🤔

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #34

#37
Thank you, Ali. To respect peoples' right to differ is almost engraved in my DNA and my parents taught me that from my childhood.

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #33

#29
I would be more than thrilled, and it would be an unforgettable experience, but unfortunatelly the probability of that is the same as if Harvey comments only once on your posts. 😀

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #32

#36
Oh Lada, your comment is differentiated and distinguished. Differentiated because it is different and opposes common beliefs "Personally, I am not a fan of such psychological theories, and I am not convinced that one's personality can be deduced from it. But it's just my opinion". Outstanding because you have sound reasoning and even when you differ you do it with humility. I believe you respect peoples' right to differ genuinely.

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #31

#28
Ali, you got me a bit worried about my comment. I read it once again to see what makes it so different from others. :-)

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #30

#24
Harvey, you put a smile on my face. I am sure that in the myriad of scientific research someone did a study about what drinking coffee reveals about your personality and I'm sure Split is included. 😂

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #29

#33
Beautiful words such as yours Amy come from beautiful people as you are.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #28

#31
We can seat you in a seat filled with water

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #27

#29
As tempting as it sounds I would be a fish out of water But I know the company would be humbling and rewarding.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #26

#27
Dear Tausif Mundrawala- your honest and openness in sharing your life experiences are enviable. Yes, I got to know you better. You see the good side of curling> It becomes a problem if it prolongs for long times. You enjoy the peace with peole you love, but if you curl yourself to stay always within the sphere that could become limiting. I do appreciate your comment. I really wish my dear friend Edward Lewellen would read your comment because he is well-experienced to respond. I hope he would.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #25

#24
Dear Harvey Lloyd?

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #24

#23
Oh my dear friend Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic for your comment is different from all comments here or on LI. I gave the reference to the research on sleeping patterns and anxiety levels. I myself hardly change my sleeping position. In fact, very rarely I do. I know you are an engineer and you want solid proofs. I am just presenting the findings of others to the discussion table. I thank you for your heart-touching words and believe me I think the same of you. As for dear Harvey Lloyd- yes he is a man whose ideas enrich mine. We exchange message and he has inspired me with many buzz ideas. He knows he has a special place in my heart

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #23

#22
What a lovely comment dear Proma \ud83d\udc1d Nautiyal then a nice story unfolds. This is something worthy of further study.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #22

#20
What a great idea my friend Randall Burns that we " it is natural for us to curl up into the "fetal position" in times of stress or sleep". There is a child in everyone of us. It becomes an issue if this situation prolongs.

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #21

#23
I believe i read many moons ago that sleeping on your back meant you were assertive. Side sleepers are confused and stomach sleepers are followers not leaders. I probably butchered the real thoughts but that is the gist of my understanding. I don't put much credence into these psychological readings of humans in the natural habitat either. I also read those folks who wear gold watches are more successful than those that wear silver:) But the best of all is those who drink coffee in Split are wise and calm.

Lada 🏡 Prkic

منذ 5 سنوات #20

Dear Ali, this is a very interesting idea for a buzz. You have a multi-track mind that takes your thoughts in many directions, from one buzz idea to another, always producing intriguing posts and combining seemingly incompatible ideas. One question that came to my mind is how accurately can sleeping position give insight into someone's personality. We change body positions many times during sleeping; we curl, roll out, stretch. I am mostly a stomach sleeper but many times wake up in different positions. So is with foetal sleepers. Personally, I am not a fan of such psychological theories, and I am not convinced that one's personality can be deduced from it. But it's just my opinion. An interesting thing about dogs is that they, like humans, have personal preferences when it comes to sleeping position. PS: Ali, I wonder what your comment threads would look like without Harvey's relevant comments. :-)

Proma Nautiyal

منذ 5 سنوات #19

What a beautiful line, uncurl your life. Babies generally cuddle and curl up in their mom's lap, the place of ultimate warmth and comfort. The lap's their safe place, away from all stress. I totally agree with the point about curling up toes in moments of anxiety. I myself have this case of overlapping toes, almost all the time, because of my anxiety issues. Now I understand why keeping them overlapped makes me feel calmer and in control. Thanks for this interesting buzz, Ali 🐝 Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee!

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #18

#20
In the old days when i traveled with construction crews this was always the statement of warning. The guys would establish the local watering hole and invariably the new guy or the smallest guy would start challenging the locals. My cousin and i would warn them we would be out the door before them. Dont mess with the locals, unless you wanted your hat handed to you.

Randall Burns

منذ 5 سنوات #17

#13
LMAO!!! Harvey Lloyd Yes here in Canada we live by that philosophy and always bring a "bear bait", (slowest runner) on our outings and hikes. Great post Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee I'm surprised that no one has mentioned it but it is natural for us to curl up into the "fetal position" in times of stress or sleep. Our bodies are remembering the warmth and safety of the womb and are yearning to return

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #16

#15
All I can tell you my dear Lisa Vanderburg is that happily you stretched the muscles of my smile and I am feeling relaxed.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #15

#14
But one thing I am sure of my friend Edward Lewellen is that when I read your "hugging and cuddling" comments I release oxytocin. But I am equally sure this release isn't deceptive and is a result of my great appreciation to you and your spirit.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #14

#13
I love your comment Harvey Lloyd. There is always a gem in any comment that you write. This time my gem is "The one capacity that humans have that animals don't, we can evaluate the fears we experience and have attached emotions". This is a hugely relevant point. We may fill a wooden barrel up to its shortest stave. No matter what we try unless we elongate the short staves the capacity of the barrel shall remain the same. Fear and negative thoughts are mostly the shortest staves. WE need to rethink how we see them if we are to increase our capacities. A filling comment by all standards.

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #13

#9
Great point Debasish Majumder rightly cautioned!). #13 Hilarious, Harvey Lloyd: 'You dont need to be the fastest runner when escaping the bear, you just need to be faster than the slowest:)' Takes a fast runner to be able to say that! #11 I second Clau!!

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #12

#8
Comments unread at the moment (always the dessert to your starter and main :) ), I must come back a give this beauty so real love. I have such a huge headache (normal for me) that if I streched now, it would break something! Back SOON - promise Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee, mon ami!

Harvey Lloyd

منذ 5 سنوات #11

When the predator sees the prey it sees lunch. But this is narrow view of the natural aspects of natural actions. Predators evaluate their abilities, size of the lunch and the amount of effort they will have to expend. Giving way to some primitive conscious thought about the next move within survival. Nature offers us a macro framework that we can add complex consiousness. The one capacity that humans have that animals dont, we can evaluate the fears we experience and have attached emotions. Fear and its cousin anxiety are alignments of thoughts where we get eaten in someway. Do we ever evaluate past experience where similar things happened and we didnt get eaten? The predator eventually gets hungry enough that the evaluative process ends and they begin to take risk. Again as humans we have a prefrontal cortex. We need not wait for situations to become epic before acting. We can establsih order within the anxiety and begin working outward to subdue the the predator we have conjured. When we make ourselves small our hope is that the predator will seek a larger meal if they are going to take the risk. You dont need to be the fastest runner when escaping the bear, you just need to be faster than the slowest:)

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #10

#11
I want to thank you dear Clau Valerio for sharing the buzz in a Spanish hive. I truly appreciate it.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #9

#9
I think our dear friend Edward Lewellen then I shall talk. Are you writing a poem? Thanks also for your generous sharing of the buzz

Debasish Majumder

منذ 5 سنوات #8

excellent buzz sirAli \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee! i wonder, when human feel extremely happy they tend to cuddle, unlike fear of other animals! is it also that human too do not want their emotional intensity may not quickly escape from their mental fabric? enjoyed read and shared. thank you for the buzz sir.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #7

#6
I am sure dear Lisa Vanderburg you always stretch your mind. Now, if you stretch your body then your mind shall even stretch more. You are amazing my friend. Because of the responsibilities you have experienced in your life it is about time that you stretch your body and muscles.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #6

#6
You stretch your mind dear Debasish Majumder. Now, it is time to stretch your body for you then shall stretch your mind more. Thank you

Lisa Vanderburg

منذ 5 سنوات #5

A delightful buzz Ali \ud83d\udc1d Anani, Brand Ambassador @beBee! It immediately reminded me to yawn and stretch fully, something my body has long forgotten to do. Getting that lungful of air means nutrients moving to every mucle and ligament in the prolonged stretch - so very refreshing!!

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #4

Debasish Majumder- dear man- I know you shall draft a poem on this buzz. I am eager to read it.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #3

Lisa Vanderburg- I am tagging you as per your request.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #2

#2
Great comment dear Clau Valerio. Fear and anxiety lead to stressful life. As indicated in the reference in the buzz research agree with your explanation on people who curl up during sleep. The idea of the buzz is to show that curling bodies suffer from the same as this is indicative of living defensively. I concur with your sound comment and explanation. You are a great thinker and I am so happy to be connected with you.

Ali Anani

منذ 5 سنوات #1

Amy L Thome- you are mentioned and quoted in this buzz

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