Andrew 🐝 Goldman en Life coaching, beBee in English, Social Media Entrepreneur & beBee ambassador • Andrew Goldman 30/11/2016 · 2 min de lectura · 2,7K

The Family

The Family

Hello, friends! Andrew Goldman here. Just as I promised on my latest stream to write a post about the family, here it is. Our world is a magical place. Everything is connected to one another. We are a part of one. But when it comes down to our families, we sometimes think it's a different case. What's about it?

Every day we communicate. Even when we stay at home alone for the whole day, we communicate. With ourselves, by watching TV, listening to the radio or switching the web. The connection is a basic need. We all require it. We all get it. But why the connection with our relatives seems to be tougher than with other people? The answer is simple - higher standards. When you don't expect anything from others and you get something, you'll appreciate it. But when you expect a lot from your family members and don't get it all, plus something above, you get hurt. Or angry. Or pissed off.

Is it out relatives problem? No. It's our standard. They might have helped us create the one, but it's our decision. We often forget that aspiration and ambition are totally different from standards. They have a different meaning. And create different passion. And you get different results.

I see a huge shift between families in the developed countries and in the developing ones. And that is easily understandable. In the developed countries, people try to stand on their own feet. The sense of competition exists. Significance. And you have more opportunities. In the developing countries, people have a lack of income and opportunities so sticking together with your family is a survival must. All the basic needs are the same. People are the same. Situations are a little different.

Now when we are all a part of one world, it is easier to learn. The family is a foundation of life. The first place where you get the knowledge, ideas, and love.

At the same time, what ruins it is the high standards that people create. Or even double standards. Like children always acknowledge that their parents could treat other children well and be different with them. Because they could have different standards for their own children and the children of others. Does it bring more love? NO. Does it create respect? NO. But it brings hate and separation. The most exciting thing about it is that parents mostly do that for their children. Because they think having higher standards will help their kids grow and have a better life. And it often ruins their relationship.

Happiness could only be based on love and appreciation. And we are the ones to make it and grow it. Lead by example. Everyone is individual, but all want the same happiness. All the beliefs of people come up during the lifetime. We were not born with them. Even terrorists were born with different beliefs. But they were taught by people and life to be that way. And they didn't question it. Or didn't' give it enough resistance. And it becomes a disaster not only for them and their families but for other people around them as well.

The family is your foundation. And anyone can do an impact. If you are not feeling loved enough, love more yourself. Lead by example. When you don't feel like your relatives care about you, start caring about them. Just imagine that if your home is your stronghold. It also means that your family members are your knights that protect it. One person can do a lot. When there are 2, 5, 20 people having the same goals and supporting each other, that's a game changer. Especially when they are your foundation. If you don't have it yet, be the one to start the change. You can and will. Love your relatives and have an awesome life!

Andrew Goldman

Andrew 🐝 Goldman 3/12/2016 · #14

Very true, thanks for a great comment, @Irene Hackett#13

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Irene Hackett 3/12/2016 · #13

You state many strong points such as family being our foundation and taking personal responsibility to lead by example. I agree with these points 100% and I appreciate the encouraging manner in which you have expressed it. I would like to address another point. To the many who were born into a highly dysfunctional and unhealthy environment - I am talking about physically and emotionally abusive environments: It is good to distance yourself from such environments in order to heal and to discover there is another way to live - goodness, harmony & love can be found once our hearts are healed and we are open to receive it.

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Andrew 🐝 Goldman 3/12/2016 · #12

Very true, @Lisa Gallagher Thanks for a great comment! #11

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Lisa Gallagher 3/12/2016 · #11

Love this buzz @Andrew Goldman. I am reminded by my grown children a lot of the positive impacts I had on their lives and sometimes they remind of the not so positive. We have to be open to hearing the 'not so positives,' in order to continue to grow. It's rare my kids share negative memories and even then, they aren't as bad as I would have envisioned because parents can be very hard on themselves as it is. I love the positive impacts they speak of because it leads to further conversation and how they are choosing to raise their own children now. This stood out, "One person can do a lot." Yes, if one person does something positive it can have a ripple effect.

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Andrew 🐝 Goldman 3/12/2016 · #10

Thanks for a great comment, @Ken Boddie! Have an awesome weekend! #9

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Ken Boddie 2/12/2016 · #9

Our family members, Andrew, like everyone else, have a range of personalities. If we attempt to understand these differences and acknowledge then with our loved ones, then we'll all be a lot happier. You'll see what I mean in this buzz I published previously, using 'Modern Family' members to illustrate the personality types:

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Andrew 🐝 Goldman 1/12/2016 · #8

Great comment, @David B. Grinberg Thank you! I believe that love and respect starts with us. It is hard but possible even for people with no relatives. After all everyone in the world is a relative. #7

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David B. Grinberg 1/12/2016 · #7

Nice buzz, Andrew. You offer many words of wisdom. I think some of the problems in America and elsewhere stem from a breakdown of the so-called nuclear family, particularly in urban areas. I imagine it's gut wrenching for a child to be raised by a single parent, not to mention perhaps never knowing who the other parent is, where they are, or why they left. This replaces love and security with feelings of abandonment, guilt and remorse. Thus, the importance of family structure cannot be overstated IMHO.
I'm sharing this on three hives. Keep buzzing, my friend!

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