Ari Sytner en IT - Information Technology, Administrative, English Principle, CEO • Sytner Coaching & Consulting, LLC 30/11/2016 · 1 min de lectura · 2,6K

Here’s a Quick Way to Stop Those Embarrassing Texts

Here’s a Quick Way to Stop Those Embarrassing TextsThe pen was once mightier than the sword. Today, there is something even more dangerous – the send button.

I am not afraid of the words I write, for they are easy to edit, undo and delete. The part that scares me is that little send button. It represents a tiny, but dangerous window between myself and the rest of the universe.

Who hasn’t experienced the embarrassment of watching a text message being sent, just as your brain registers the autocorrected version of your text? Instead of telling someone, “ I love you”, you might have just accidentally said, “I loathe you”. Slight difference, right?

What about those times where you sent the right text, but to the wrong person? As one of my clients explained, “My neighbor Jody was really annoying me, texting me day and night. I was so frustrated that I texted my sister to tell her how much I can’t stand Jody. The only problem was that instead of texting my sister, I accidentally sent it to Jody”.

Who hasn’t been copied on a group email from their manager, but inadvertently “replied-all” when responding to their colleagues regarding their ongoing frustrations about the boss?

I shudder to think about how many relationships have been derailed, how many jobs have been lost and how many people have been devastated by such impulsive and silly mistakes. All of these could have been prevented if only a little more restraint was exercised before pressing send.

Abraham Lincoln was famous for composing scathing letters to his critics, where he would unleash his wrath against them. The only caveat was that he would seal the envelopes and place the letters in his desk, never to actually be delivered. He found this exercise to be cathartic, allowing him to say what he felt, but to take great care to not hurt the feelings of others. This form of restraint is a perfect example of how one should pause before pressing the send button.

I have implemented a practice of my own, which I call, “The Slow Send”.

Whenever I am sending a text, Tweet or email, I press my finger on the send button, but I do not let it go for a few seconds. Often enough, during that brief moment of reviewing my message, I will notice an error in what I have said, or to whom I am saying it. Without lifting my finger, I can then slide it over to the side, which resets the send button and prevents the message from being sent, allowing me to correct it before it gets away from me.

While we are so blessed to have so many forms of awesome communication, we must be careful in how we use them. The fast pace and impulsive nature of life around us is aimed at tripping us up and, therefore, requires extra pause. I am glad to hear a lot of awareness regarding the dangers of texting and driving. Perhaps the conversation should start by realizing how dangerous texting could be just while standing still.

Consider using a “Slow Send” and please share below to comment and let me know if it works for you! 

Sarah Elkins 7/12/2016 · #12

Good thinking, Ari. That second glance often saves the requirement for many recovery texts - or flower delivery. I have a 24 hour rule when I'm angry or frustrated. I write the message and save in the drafts until I can read it for tone, calmly. Good reminder here.

Gerald Hecht 3/12/2016 · #11

#10 you are quite welcome Elizabeth. It's fun to learn new stuff.

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Elizabeth Bailey 3/12/2016 · #10

#9 @Gerald Hecht you did. I had to look up the word prophylactic. Thanks for adding to my vocabulary.

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Gerald Hecht 3/12/2016 · #9

#3 @Elizabeth Bailey reminders which serve as cues for vigilance are often effective prophylactics with regards to complacency. I like how that almost sounds like I said something.

+1 +1
Gerald Hecht 3/12/2016 · #8

#4 @Randy Keho so there was no misunderstanding.

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Gerald Hecht 3/12/2016 · #7

Some people say "Love means never having to say you're sorry"...I don't know if they say that all of the time...maybe everybody says it some of the time. Hopefully this will be helpful for some folks or maybe partially helpful for all.

+1 +1

"slow send" is a good habit to get into. When I look back at my texts and comments and see mistakes, I cringe. Good idea, Ari.

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Mohammed A. Jawad 3/12/2016 · #5

Perhaps, the greater mess we feel is how difficult life has become with so much of technology and digitalization. Life goes all erroneous when we become unmindful.

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