Selah Ave. Gallery of poems -- Volume 3: The Basement's Dark room
These copyrighted poems span 20 years of my darkest moments, which, when fully developed, produced memorable snapshots in my life -- ultimately not all bad as they seemed. Jill Scott sings, "If you have a nightmare, do you stop dreaming?" A country song I love says "I thank God for unanswered prayers." Some of these poems were painful cries of my heart.
Doctors say I have a murmur,
an echo in my heart
a loose flap on its skin
I say all that double beating is cause inside my chest my heart has a twin
One bleeds for world suffering and my repeated loss of those I called friends
In perfect cadence it recalls the hurtful last words of those I let in:
With each heartbeat it swells, till it fills my chest and drowns its sister out
The other heart beats fast in frustration, each full patter, a push-pull, push-pull of emotion
Like watching the moon wax and wane in fast motion
Or waves ebb and flow at double time in the ocean
They beat and patter, pound and flutter until sweat seeps from my eyes, and tears of blood seemingly drip from my skin
Is it HOT IN HERE?
My twin hearts burn with empathy
ache with longing
and betray my emotions
If I could just get them to stop for a minute!
To die: to sleep;
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd.
I am the beautiful half of a golden hurt
I am the shooting star that no on sees because everyone is sleeping
I am the warm summers air that no one experiences because they 're cooped up in their air conditioned cars
I am the awe-some sunrise that God himself pushes open the curtains of the universe for my debut-
but no one notices as they rush to school and work
I am the answer of a prayer that is fantasized but never prayed
I am that 'just what you were looking for' but never stopped to look
I am the we