Lisa Vanderburg

4 years ago · 2 min. reading time · ~10 ·

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Children

Years ago, I used to go once a week to the Children's Home In Tampa, Florida. I'd go with a couple others to introduce Christianity to our 8-9 year old charges. At the last stage, I was pleased that I'd actually drawn a map of generations between Christ and now, clouds, angels and all! I thought it was right, but - tsk! - the kids cared not! 

But initially, I found this exceedingly hard. It was less to do with the kids or what we were doing, and more to do with me 'working with others.' Not something I do well (unless they're convicts (my job))....certainly under the auspices of a church! That said, I grew to it: to the children mainly. They were busted-up kids suffering from excessive need, terrifying withdrawal and probably the worst aspect: hope. One kid used to sidle to another 'teacher' of my ilk...she would recite 'Song of Songs' from the bible...it royally pissed me off. Why? It seemed somehow inappropriate. As it turned out, this wee fella had been taught that encouraging sexual pleasure from an adult was the way to 'happiness'. Truly, it was a way to survive. Mercifully, she left - a hair appointment or five.


Over the three years I went, it came with certainty, and more dread. Naturally, I put this down to me. But during that time, I saw the upshot of prospective parents or 'reformed' parents who came, took home their newly beloved child, and then promptly returned him/her. These dumped kids made me see that the 'boy-who-pleased' I mentioned before, has been shown the 'need-to-last-chance.' Kids dumped back had less and less spirit. They sorta shut down. Can't blame them. I dreaded the times I visited just after prospective parents showed up; moreso, the I mourned at the weeks following.


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Those kids were Kudzu-laden trees. They stood little chance in hell.
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They grew from umbilical to umbrageous. Their roots were phantoms. Just before I, and my most steadfast partner  (whom I grew to love dearly: she was not like me but she honestly understood & her empathy was vast!)  left our session, we herded our 20-so kids into the kitchen for the staff to give them their last snack of the evening: we brought the snack; they brought the drugs. EVERY KID had to take the drugs. I'm sure some were tailored, but sedatives must have been part of that programme. How in hell do you run a 500+ children's home - in barracks - without the absolute need for control? There were every age, in different barracks, spread across a hectare or so of land.


I'm not damning the 'staff' at all. But, sure as shit, I'm damning the need.
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Oddly for me, I cannot find out how many children (age-related) are housed in homes in the UK. I gave to one, but it was like...15 kids? Despite government mandates, I also cannot ascertain to age-grouping of these kids.

Why do we cast off our spawn...like spent sperm? 
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We talk of our planet dying, of polar bears and ice-shelves. Yet, we rid ourselves of the very thing that [apparently] defines us. I am appalled to hear today of a case I've been following: Manchester



Funny that, at the age of 50, my sister asked me the name of our parish priest back when we were nippers - before the great atlantic trip, and I came up with it!

Monsignore Thomas Thomas J Finney was our priest and manager during our rather tumultuous upbringing when I was a child (up to near 7). Funnily enough, that name plucked out of me to my sister's calling - I was 50 then! So far as I know, no one had ever mentioned him, but he came out faster that a magician's bunny. Strange what you remember, yet it was not until then that we could really 'see.'


We worry about our planet. We think 'polar bear.' Shouldn't we wonder about what we've discarded? 

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Comments

Lisa Vanderburg

4 years ago #14

#16
Ya know? I'm ALWAYS late, so I relish even more your comment, lovely Fay Vietmeier! WHEN I'm here, methinks I'm a bit of a Debby-downer. Je scream, je scream! Yet...your words lift me up...you are a love! Thank you....

Fay Vietmeier

4 years ago #13

#15
Lisa Vanderburg Stepping in late Lisa~ It is hard to find the right words to your poignant post … so I’ll respond with some of your own… “They stood little chance in hell…those kids were Kudzu-laden trees” “I'm not damning the 'staff' … But, sure as shit, I'm damning the need” Henry David Thoreau: “It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see.” Oh worms: Why do cast off your spawn...like spent sperm? Such behavior outrageous … umbrageous … in this I am firm! FINE: “worry about our planet … protect “ice-shelves & polar bears” BUT wake-up!!... “Discarded children” … about THIS we should care!!

Lisa Vanderburg

4 years ago #12

#7
#8 I love the idea that we are children at every stage of our lives! Many vaid points and I thank you Oswaldo Enrique Diaz Delgado

Lisa Vanderburg

4 years ago #11

#11
SAVE THE POLAR BEARS!! Too true, Pascal Derrien :)

Ali Anani

4 years ago #10

#10
I have just uploaded my post in which I refer to your great post dear Lisa Vanderburg https://www.bebee.com/producer/@ali-anani/hardening-hearts

Ali Anani

4 years ago #9

#10
Dear Lisa Vanderburg In few minutes I shall be posting my buzz on Hardened Hearts. In this post I refer to your great post here.

Pascal Derrien

4 years ago #8

Hey life is a complex stuff already not always a straight forward answer on why we make it even more complicated..... I got that quote from a polar bear :-)

Lisa Vanderburg

4 years ago #7

#6
Oh, that's a keeper...brilliant man! You are a love!

Ali Anani

4 years ago #6

#4
Each comment you write dear Lisa Vanderburg may be expanded into a post easily. This time I suggest a post by you on "Why do we pine for salvation when we leave so very little to salve? Your mind oozes new ideas.

Lisa Vanderburg

4 years ago #5

#1
#2 Bless you for the shares, mes hommes d'honneur!

Lisa Vanderburg

4 years ago #4

#2
Amiyn, dear friend. I'm sure you have witnessed {by proxy or otherwise] every conceivable cruelty known over your lifetime. You are precious and the best of human. I also know that your heart bleeds a little when I write. No greater privilege is a drop of your blood ever though I know the pain it costs! Lo siento :( Why do we pine for salvation when we leave so very little to salve?

Lisa Vanderburg

4 years ago #3

#1
Ken, my Duke! My mind won't turn away from the plight you're magnificent country's under. I keep wanting to empathise, yet I have the least of all in rooted empathy. You are a precious fella....! Thank you!

Ali Anani

4 years ago #2

Dear Lisa Vanderburg- you are a gifted writer because you know how to keep the reader interested. You described the chaos our societies suffer very well "We talk of our planet dying, of polar bears and ice-shelves. Yet, we rid ourselves of the very thing that [apparently] defines us". Sadly and oddly enough we do the same with our children- they define us and yet some of us not only discard the children, but also deprives them of hope. We leave desperate heats in need to re-instill hope in their souls. Here, I wonder how successful you were with restoring hope for those unfortunate children. Worse, we not only deprive children of hope, but also make them feel they are like what you eloquently described as Kudzu-laden trees. They invade us with no purpose and no benefit. Horrible feeling as children should be what Ken Boddie wrote in his previous comment #1 “I believe the children are our future, Teach them well and let them lead the way, Show them all the beauty they possess inside".

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #1

“I believe the children are our future, Teach them well and let them lead the way, Show them all the beauty they possess inside, Give them a sense of pride to make it easier, Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be.” Whitney Houston’s lyrics ... easy to quote... apparently not so easy to put into practice.

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