U2 TO RECORD NEXT ALBUM IN WHITE HOUSE

Bono told The Lint Screen today that the band’s next album will be recorded in the situation room in the White House.

“I heard the Omarosa track with General Kelly, and I flipped out,” the dreamy Dublin crooner croaked. “The acoustics were incredible, rich and resonant, sonically spectacular. I think that magical space will be perfect for our band’s next album. Don Was will be producing, and he is completely jacked about working in ‘the sitch.’ We're so excited, we may release it on Apple Music, Yahoo, or MySpace.”

The album, tentatively titled Butterflies in a Death Spiral, will begin sessions on August 30. There has been no word if Omarosa or Kelly will make guest appearances.

“We’d love to have them,” Bono said, “if their labels will let them do it.”

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Patrick Scullin (aka PD Scullin) is a founder of ASO Advertising and recently left the ad game to be a full-time writer, wrangling parts of speech to entertain and amuse.

He has two blogs: The Lint Screen (satire, smartassery humor, pop culture ramblings, and advice for people getting hip replacements) and Empathetic Adman (marketing pontification).

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