Weiner's iPhone Confiscated By Wife

He's in Dutch with the ol' ball and chain for sexting. The 147th time he's been caught. <em>Wha-wha-wha!!!</em>

His wife, Huma Abedin, an aide to Hillary Clinton, has snatched his iPhone from his horny little hands after Weiner was caught sexting another woman.

"I've about had it with him," Abedin told <a href="http://www.thelintscreen.com">The Lint Screen</a>. "In fact, today I called Tim Cook at Apple and told him to begin development on an anti-Weiner software update for all iPhones. My husband must be stopped. Now! Anthony seems to have a bit of a problem, and if technology can't solve it, I don't know what I'm going to do. I tried getting him to play Candy Crush, and all he did was take crotch shots and send them to I-don't-know-where!"

"I guess I'm a rascal," Weiner confessed. He smiled and looked down at his feet, at least that's where this reporter thought he was looking.

He has two blogs:  Empathetic Adman (marketing pontification) and The Lint Screen (satire,  smartassery humor, pop culture ramblings, and advice for people getting hip replacements).