The Down Side Of Over-exaggerating Problems
If we are incapable of finding peace in ourselves, it is pointless to search elsewhere. ~Francois de la Rochefoucauld
I was walking on the trail, and it was raining and snowing at the same time. The gun metal bluish colour of the clouds predicted much more wind and weather to come, while the forest, devoid of any colour other than grays and blacks, danced and swayed in the wind, meekly absorbing the onslaught of the elements. The immensity of the morning was awe-inspiring. To me, this kind of weather is perfect for recharging my batteries. Careful not to step on any ice or in any water, I picked and hopped my way along the trail, trying as I went to become one with my surroundings.
About half way down the trail, I felt a small pebble in my shoe and because it had started raining so hard and I didn’t want to stop in the rain, I just kept going and tried to forget about the pebble. A little while later, I could feel a couple of pebbles tumbling around in my shoe and it was starting to get very annoying. “Just forget about”, I thought, and kept on going. It seemed that with every step that I took, the pebbles got bigger and bigger. It got to the point that I was sure that they were going to cut into my foot if I left them there any longer. So, leaning against a sheltering tree, I stopped and took off my shoe to dump out the boulders. What nimbly rolled out of my shoe were two of the smallest pebbles that you could imagine. Dumbfounded, I stood there in the rain and snow, embarrassed at myself for making such a big thing out of something so insignificant.
Isn’t our stress and anxiety a lot like those pebbles?
We go through our daily lives, skipping and hopping over the obstacles that we encounter, trying every day to be as successful as we can, when we get a pebble in our “shoe”. So, what do we do? We leave them in and attempt to continue on, hoping they will go away, while in the background, these pebbles become seemingly insurmountable. Then, because we have chosen to have had them in our “shoe” for a while, they just become a part of who we are or who we seem to be. Without realizing it, these pebbles affect our attitudes, our relationships and our thoughts.
What are some of these pebbles that we encounter?
Here's a few: someone who said something mean to us and we refused to forget it, someone who didn’t do something in the way that we wanted them too, people who don't clean up after themselves, a product you bought that wasn’t up to your level of perfection, a look you got from someone, a discourteous driver, a flat tire, a broken window or even a misunderstanding with a coworker or family member.
We all know that if we leave a wound uncleaned, it will fester and get infected, so too will a wound in our thinking and our attitudes. The infection is usually called pride or ego, but it appears in many forms, and if not let go of, will alienate us from the people in our lives who can give us support and happiness.
If we continue to hold onto the stresses and worries and petty annoyances that we carry around with us, we will become bitter at the whole world and everyone in it. We will get so tired of carrying these burdens that we will cease to care. On the other hand, if we give ourselves permission to let go of these stresses, we instantly feel better about, not just ourselves, but everyone else with whom we come into contact with. The magical thing about all of this is that this gift costs nothing and it can be given at any time of the year. All we need to do is to choose to let go, and it will be there instantly. Ultimately though, we must ask ourselves if we want to be bitter or better, or if we want to be happy or crappy, but we must ask the question and we must choose.
The choice you make will determine the amount of happiness you have in your life.
Choose joy. Right now we need more joy in this world.
A Bit about me...
My vision is quite simple: to make an impact on the lives of the people who have been entrusted to me: You (for reading this article), my family and my clients.
I coach people. Direct, practical, innovative, meaningful.
I coach for excellence.
I love what I do... and so do my clients.
Over the years I've noticed that business coaching that was supposed to make us stronger actually took away our confidence and made us doubt ourselves. Confidence and people skills aren't developed just by measuring and planning everything, they grow through doing and learning from experience and by taking risks. People want to make a difference. Build teams. Be better understood. Live more confidently.
I founded IBC Impact Business Communication Inc. to create a world where business people communicate and act with confidence to create better worlds for themselves. Worlds where they feel powerful and free to express themselves. Worlds where something as simple as conversation creates energy, understanding and impact. Worlds so exquisite, I couldn't imagine doing anything else.
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