You Can Run But You Can’t Hide: How to Coach and Be Coached.
Behind every mask that we wear, lies another just waiting to be exposed.
Dan and I were sitting in his car, just finishing up lunch when we got into one of the most meaningful and productive conversations that I have ever had with a friend. We started with the usual kind of humour and kidding that good friends often have, but it just seemed different. We got to chatting about Dan’s challenges with work and personal development, and me being me, I thought that I had to coach him on what he was saying and on his direction. So, the more questions I asked him, the more specific and clear he became. His goals were making me excited as well. Just when I thought that we were wrapping up, he asked me a question that got me thinking. “With your experience in your business, why don’t you own the company that you are with?” I couldn’t answer him. I really didn’t know just what to say that would explain my motives for the position that I was in. Actually, it caught me completely unawares. My first reaction was, “Hold on there buddy, I’m usually the one who asks the questions, I don’t know if I’m ready to go there.” Right then and there, I got a real good feel for what it is like to be coached by someone who genuinely cares about you and who is interested in you and your future. To say the least, I was dumbfounded by the turn of events, and my reaction to it. But Dan just sat there and looked expectantly at me and waited for my answer. Well, that innocent question led us to an hour and a half of mutual questions and coaching. There was no power play, or cautious answers, it was just simply looking at our present realities and possibilities.
I have never had that opportunity to be coached in such a genuine way. We both had nothing to prove to each other, and we had everything to gain. We weren’t there to judge one another; we were there to support each other. So unique was the whole experience, that ever since our conversation it has had me thinking about who I am and who I could be, and let me tell you, I am ten times more excited today as I sit and write this than I was even when we talked. The awakening that I received was simply this: When we look at what we are capable of, and then look at what we have accomplished, we can become simply astounded with the possibilities that lay before us.
For as long as I have been in this business, I have enjoyed coaching the other person. It is easy for me to make it about them, it is a lot harder when it is me who is