*The Reverse S'more*

People generally refrain from difficult conversations, until and unless they have a method in place which helps them tackle difficult situations and confrontations in an "oh-so easy" manner that leaves people wondering how they do it in the first place, so consistently. 

However, for most of us, life seems easier when we can avoid those conversations or just go for them reluctantly as a person with acrophobia, or even better, tachophobia (fear of speed) would sit on a roller coaster. Just get on it, get it done, and pray that you come out of that terrifying experience in a single piece. 

Workplace situations are often the most dreaded scenarios. You need to get the work done and you need to make sure mistakes or inefficiencies are kept at bay. These requirements call for the so-called difficult conversations and this is the method I have adopted to come out of these unscathed. 

Not all conversations in life are easy, be it personal or professional communication. But there is always a good way of conveying something that the person might perceive as unpleasant. Most often it's a feedback that makes people feel uncomfortable. They might end up taking it personally rather than an outcome of the work they have done. 

Here's a way in which you could handle difficult feedback-related conversations: 

1. Appreciate the person's efforts 

2. Say that it could also be done 'this way' which 'might' provide better and quicker results

3. Once again, appreciate the person's overall effort at workplace which is not specific to the particular job outcome you were talking about. 

This makes the person feel valued as a part of the organization (even family). Even if they were partially considering point 2 earlier, now they feel motivated to actually do better and think of following what you said. 

Opening and closing with appreciation makes the person feel valued and thus open to suggestions, rather than feel victimized for being criticized and act out defensively opposing your suggestions. I would like to call this "The Reverse S'more Theory" : Marshmallows on the outside, cracker on this inside. 

 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My motto: "There is no bigger pleasure than going to bed, everyday, a little bit wiser and happier than you woke up that morning."

You can find out more about me and my works at: www.digiwitch.com