Free Chapter 1 — You ARE The Words You Use - From Imperfect Phrases For Relationships
The following is the first chapter from ImPerfect Phrases For Relationships: 101 COMMON Things You Should Never Say To Someone Important To You... And What To Say Instead By Robert Bacal. It's a straight forward guide to help you eliminate the conversation "firestarters" and to replace them with more constructive and more cooperative ways of communicating.
You ARE The Words You Use
If you are interested in better relationships, at home and at work, you’ve no doubt come across a lot of the “advice” offered on how to create the relationships you want. After all it’s important for your personal life, and career to forge positive, peaceful and constructive relationships.
Unfortunately, much of the advice is vague. You’re told: Show the other person respect. Or Listen carefully. Or, stay calm. It’s impossible to disagree with vague advice, because...well, it’s so vague, and so superficially sensible that no sane person would object. It’s all pretty useless and the worst part is you don’t realize it’s all pretty useless.
The problem is that vague advice focuses on ideas or concepts — respect, caring, politeness, as if they mean the same thing to everyone. They don’t. They are also removed from what really counts, your visible behavior. You can only be known by what peopl