Royce Shook

4 years ago · 1 min. reading time · 0 ·

Blogging
>
Royce blog
>
A waste of thyme

A waste of thyme

Saw a kid standing on one leg at an ATM.

Confused, I asked him what he was doing?

He told me he was just checking his balance.

Q. Which country's capital has the fastest-growing population?

A. Ireland. Every day it's Dublin.

I have many jokes about unemployed people, sadly none of them work.

So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world

I bought a wooden whistle. But it wooden whistle. so I bought a steel whistle. But it steel wooden whistle. So I bought a lead whistle. But it steel wooden lead me whistle.

RIP boiling water. You will be mist.

I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. – I lost my case.

Why did the tomato blush? – Because it saw the salad dressing.

Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? – It was a grave mistake.

I would tell you a construction pun, but I’m still working on it

If you give a gator a GPS, does that make it a navigator?

I had to clean out my spice rack and found everything was too old and had to be thrown out. – What a waste of thyme.

What do you call a dead parrot? Polygon

What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just WAVED.

Can you SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Why are you so SALTY? Don’t be a BEACH.

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? – Because they lactose.

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Answer: ground beef.

I had to clean out my spice rack and found everything was too old and had to be thrown out. – What a  waste of thyme.

My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles’ elbow.

My friend could not afford to pay his water bill anymore, so I sent him a card, “Get well soon.”

Where do mathematicians go to die?

The symmetry

Accordion to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected.

I was very lonely so I bought some shares. – It’s nice to have a bit of company.

nF

 

LNG LAVGIL)

Comments

Bill Stankiewicz

4 years ago #9

Love the post Royce, thank you @FRANCI for sharing. This reminds me of a song when I want to sing people tell me Bill sing "Far Far Away."

Bill Stankiewicz

4 years ago #8

Cool buzz

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #7

#7
Talking of whistles, @Praveen Raj Gullepalli, did you wet your blower on this windy blog? https://www.bebee.com/producer/@ken-boddie/epistle-on-the-whistle.

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #6

#7
Talking of whistles, Praveen Raj Gullepalli, did you wet your blower on this windy blog? https://www.bebee.com/producer/edit/69704.

Jim Murray

4 years ago #5

Funny shit, Royce. Hope they are all yours.

Royce Shook

4 years ago #4

Hi Swati, this is a picture from Mansfield Australia, Victoria State

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #3

BTW, Royce, I specialise in grand dad jokes. They're like dad jokes, only much, much older.

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #2

Hey, Royce, I bet that people used to laugh at you when you told them you wanted to be a dad joke specialist. Well nobody's laughing now. 🤣

Pascal Derrien

4 years ago #1

:-)

Articles from Royce Shook

View blog
4 hours ago · 4 min. reading time

My thanks to my cousin Irene for this and she received it from Karen · The telephone rang. · It was ...

3 days ago · 1 min. reading time

My thanks to Walter and his sense of "old" humour for these · 'OLD' IS WHEN... · Your sweetie says · ...

1 month ago · 1 min. reading time

In the last couple of years, there has been a move towards embracing a more comprehensive account of ...

Related professionals

You may be interested in these jobs

  • RT Medical

    Registered Practical Nurse RPN

    Found in: Talent CA C2 - 6 days ago


    RT Medical Brampton, Canada Part time

    Registered Practical Nurse (RPN) · At RT Medical, we're committed to providing the best quality services to support our patients and customers in their health and wellness needs. This commitment includes supporting all of our team members however we can. · Perks · $2000 signing ...

  • Randstad Canada

    Payroll Specialist

    Found in: Talent CA C2 - 2 days ago


    Randstad Canada Toronto, Canada Permanent

    Position: Payroll Specialist · Type: Permanent Full-Time · Location: Etobicoke, ON (Hybrid) · Salary: $70,000 - $75,000 · We are looking for a Payroll Specialist for one of North America's industrial gas and engineering companies. · Are a certified Payroll Compliance Practitione ...

  • Intelcom

    Développeur logiciel senior

    Found in: Talent CA C2 - 4 hours ago


    Intelcom Montreal, Canada Full time

    Ride the next mile with us · We're looking for a Senior Software Developer - Mobile to join our cutting-edge multi-platform front-end development team, which is expanding to develop new high-level projects for all business units, mainly in C# using the MAUI platform. We're lookin ...