Who is in your circle?
Who is in your circle? When we are young, we have a large circle of friends and a larger circle of acquaintances. Over time that circle changes, I once read that we have a circle of influence (friends, family and acquaintances) of about 200 people. I am not sure if that number is true or not, but it is, I think, pretty close to the reality of our life.
When we marry and invite people to our wedding we try to hold the party to close friends and family from each side. So we take the time and have great discussions about who we should invite and who we could not invite. We eliminate from our list, those people who are not very close to us. This is hard for both the bride and the groom but once the elimination of people is completed, the wedding guest list is around 200 plus people.
When we die, the notice goes out to all those who have known us and at most funerals, there are about 200 hundred people, made up of friends, family, co-workers, and acquaintances. They are not the same people who were at our wedding, because as we move through life our circle of 200 changes. Some years it expands, some years it contracts, but the size stays fairly constant--unless you are not a very nice person. In your life, you have people who love you, mentored you, who helped you, who helped, you mentored and you love. Those people play an important role in our life. John Lennon sums it up well in his song "In My Life"
There are places I remember
All my life though some have changed
Some forever not for better
Some have gone and some remain
All these places have their moments
With lovers and friends I still can recall
Some are dead and some are living
In my life I've loved them all
But of all these friends and lovers
There is no one compares with you
And these memories lose their meaning
When I think of love as something new
Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I'll often stop and think about them
In my life I love you more
Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I'll often stop and think about them
In my life I love you more
In my life I love you more
Think about this words and the people that surround you even now. They see, hear, and feel what you see, hear, and feel. They trade vantage points, study possibilities, and learn to think bigger. They brag about you, compliment you, and laugh at your jokes. They only ever squabble over who loves you most.
Shhhh... they're reading this...
"
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Comments
Gloria (Glo) Ochoa
6 years ago #10
Debasish Majumder
6 years ago #9
Ken Boddie
6 years ago #8
Liesbeth Leysen, MSc.
6 years ago #7
Liesbeth Leysen, MSc.
6 years ago #6
John Rylance
6 years ago #5
Royce, i found in my work looking at social/behaviour issues in young children, revealed many unexpected facts. Some like the 10yr were thought provoking, while others like 6yr old were potentially concerning needing careful handling not just of him but of his peer group on friendship not just being about boy/girl friendships. Much of it reflected what was occurring in their parent(s) lives. We were walking on eggshells for a while.
Royce Shook
6 years ago #4
John, that ten-year-old made an interesting point and a very mature one, I think as we mature, we value all our friends and many of us don't have one best friend. The school culture that the young six-year-old boy was in is very strange to me. I never even thought of having a girlfriend until I was in grade 3. Never had one until university but that is a different story. I am glad that you were able to help build his confidence and self-esteem
John Rylance
6 years ago #3
Royce Shook
6 years ago #2
John, you are correct about the social media junkies, I think it is a sign of an immature outlook on life, to claim to have many, many friends. When I taught junior high school, I noticed that many young teens (grade 8 and 9--ages 14-15) would try to have as many friends as possible, but as they moved to grade 12 (17-19 years old) they would become more selective about who they called friends. John, I like your idea of us having an inner and outer circle.
John Rylance
6 years ago #1